Last weekend I went and saw two very different movies. Here is what I thought of them.

Friday: I was quick witted enough to go to the box office earlier in the day to get tickets for the big monster rummages around big city summer blockbuster in the middle of winter “Cloverfield” – which was great because judging from the huge line and packed theater – it was the movie event of the night. Directed by Matt Reeves and produced by mister “I make Lost” J.J. Abrams – himself, I have been anxiously awaiting this movie since the first trailer that I saw. It was a great teaser that gave me very little information and just whetted my appetite for this unknown movie that was coming out. I am pretty sure that it didn’t even give me a title. It was a mystery.

When I went into the theater – I knew that the reviews had been all over the board. Some people just said that it was a great ride but not heavy on heavy stuff, others said that it was a reinvention of several genres and an important film and some other people said that it was schlocky piece of junk that preyed on fresh images from actual bad things that happened all too recently in everyone’s favorite “city with a bulls-eye” – New York.

My excitement was sliding on a thin layer of nervousness . . . could this “found footage” movie live up to the great marketing build-up that had been built-up around it. Well the answer is convoluted. My biggest recommendation when going to see this movie is to sit far away from the screen – or else you are in for 84 minutes of topsy-turvy stomach vertigo. It was fun – it was a throw away – it was a movie about a creepy monster that walks around and breaks things and after the initial exposition scenes – it moved along so quickly that I didn’t even have a chance to get too annoyed.

Annoyed – you say? Well – yeah. Unfortunately – the bulk of the point of the movie was missed on me because the people that we are running around the city with for the entire movie were (in my book) just not very likable. I mean – I rooted for them, gulped, gasped and sat at the edge of my seat for them – but at no time was I ever like “After you get away from all of that monster bad times – how’s about you and me go get a beer and talk about the good old days.” Or anything like that.

Except for the hoping off of my seat a couple of times and all of the things blowing up, the best part was when at some point the screen faded to black and someone said (out-loud in the theater) “Yo, that better not be the end.” Well – don’t you worry mister coconut – it wasn’t the end. There was still a teensy bit left. And I wonder if that teensy bit fullfilled whatever you thought was lacking when you talked to the darkened screen because when the end did come there was no clapping – just a bunch of people shuffling out trying to regain their balance. Trying to figure out what their best plan of action would be if a monster ever took the detour past the city and up the Hudson river to their neck of the woods. What would they say to it? Which of the town’s spectacular eateries and entertainment options would they offer?

I have to guess that was what they were trying to puzzle out behind their bleary eyes. I heard one girl come out of the bathroom and tell her boyfriend that she had “Totally just thrown up – yo.” I figured that I had just walked out of a really super expensive and well made pilot for some big show – next season – on a cable channel (due to the violence and gore) – and I was cool with that. It was a show that I would probably watch.

Probably.

  1. bumpercar
    bumpercar says:

    I’m not going to not agree with you there – sir.

    Just go into it with the thought that you are going to see a really great pilot to a show that will never be.

    Ooh – and you get to see the Star Trek teaser and the Iron Man trailer – but no Hulk – no Hulk to be seen.

    Anywhere.