A ROUGH WEEK!

Here is an illustration of how a week that starts to go downhill can quickly pick up speed as it rolls rolls rolls down down down – to the point where you have to address the situation(s) that is(are) happening as being oddly humorous – if even just because you can’t really believe that the world is serious about what is going on. . .

This specific series of events started when I burst out of my house fretting about being on the cusp of “about to be” being (and being and being) late to a meeting that had taken me months to arrange. Immediately I was stuck by the distinct brokenness of the windshield of my car – which was a state that it hadn’t been in when I had gone to sleep the night before.

I yelped a little curse and sped towards getting severely lost for my meeting somewhere in the wilds near the Alabama border – when I go the bright idea to call up my lizard endorsed insurance company to ask what I should do about the ever (ever) growing crack on the big piece of glass in front of me. Their first suggestion was to pay the $500 (five-hundred dollar) deductible – which didn’t sound very fun to me. The next was to contact the glass company directly and see what they said.

Well – I got in touch with the glass company – where I got stuck knee deep in an odd conversation about poetry and the cosmic nature of cosmic things that are cosmological in nature. All the while, I was getting more and more crazy twisted lost and later and later to my meeting. It was a strange time to be driving around – but I scheduled the windshield to get repaired the next day – in my driveway – for only $200 (two-hundred dollar bills) and all seemed better in the world. I even (eventually) got to my meeting.

The next day rolled around and the nice guy came and fixed my windshield (in my driveway) – it was great – the world was great. The world continued it’s upswing when I found a super cheap new XM Satellite Radio for the car. I tend to drive as much as a trucker up and down the east coast (or the E.C. as we call it in the driving trade – because abbreviations are quicker to say) – and the XM has become my favorite crutch to lean on as I drive. So I bought the new unit and properly installed all of the wires running along the (new) windshield and the antenna coming out of the trunk and everything. Things were really on the up and up and up and up – I’d say.

We are officially at the middle (the high point) of the movie (the bad movie) where everything starts to zip downward style.

Now (and we are still in day number two here – the same day that the windshield was installed and the XM was bought/installed) I had another meeting in the afternoon. So I got into my awesome car and went went went to it. But not – of course – before I had to go to the tire place around the corner to get the sadly flattened tire happily unflattened. On the way home was where the next batch fun happened (it was becoming an all I could eat buffet of fun). It started raining – the kind of crazy rain where you can barely drive – and so I did what you are kind of supposed to do . . . I turned on the wipers. Nothing happened. On the highway – in the pouring rain – into the “emergency lane” I went. Out of the car – fiddle-faddle with the wiper – and then POP! The windshield cracked again . . . the wipers were too tight – or the glass was too lame – or something.

Luckily – the company came out the next day to repair the (put in a new) windshield. Everything seemed to be looking up . . . Until I got into the car later – to find that the newly installed antennae wire had been cut during the windshield re-installation process . . . the windshield and the tire were doing well . . . the XM was dead . . . my head started hurting.

I took the XM back (sneakily putting my old – also broken – but not in any detectable way – antennae into the box) – to get a different one. Evidently – I got the last one. There were no replacements.

It had been three days of 2 (two) broken windshields, a flat tire and a bought/installed/broken/returned radio thingy. It all made me sleepy, so I went home and took a nap. That usually makes the world a slightly better place.

Slightly . . .

Yep – yep – yep – I seriously know that I am cheating by just posting 2 (two) ants for the sum total of this week so far . . . but I am away from the cave – they let me out! They let let me out!!

But fear not – fear mongers – because tomorrow there will be words (a lot of them) . . .

But before I go – 2 (two) quick things:

  • I found out a couple of hours ago – that one of my penguins may be endangered. This isn’t even speaking in one of my odd codes – there is just more of a back story than I am able to jump into for right this second . . . All I can say is that I fear for his safety.
  • I was just just told a story by someone who spent his morning saving a duckling. I suppose that as one bird prepares to leave the world – another needs to be saved.

Birds of a feather – Flock together. Aye – yo – that is fowl. Get your ducks in a row. If it walks like a duck and quacks like a duck. Bird brain. Snow birds. Birdy-Birdy Two by Four can’t fit through the birdcage door. You are such a chicken. Eagle eyes. Goosed. Quack quack waddle waddle. Quack quack waddle waddle. Quack quack waddle waddle.

So – last night – and all of the time – I noticed that my bag was breaking me. It was ridiculously heavy. It hurt very much – my neck and my back.

I got curious how much it weighed . . . how about 15.4 (fifteen point four) pounds!

Then I got curious as to how much my clothes weighed . . . they were 6.2 (six point two) pounds!

It is a wonder that I can even walk upright . . . carrying 21.6 (twenty one and a half) pounds around all day and night . . . from doing a little research – I think that a knight in shining armor only had to carry around 17 (seventeen) or so pounds . . . and turtles – only about a couple or so . . . my research is sound!
So now – I only carry 1 (one) bag of marshmallows in my bag – and for clothes – I use leaves.

Today is a new day.