Tag: contracts

Bumperpodcast #414 – Season 2 – Funny Bone

Natty saves some baby ducklings. It’s truly the sweetest story on the block!
The Bumperpodcast with Natty Bumpercar is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!! Also, also, we have a Patreon page now!!! https://www.patreon.com/nattybumpercar Another story about saving baby animals! A feel good story! Previous episode!
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[av_toggle_container faq_markup=” initial=’0′ mode=’accordion’ sort=” styling=” colors=” font_color=” background_color=” border_color=” toggle_icon_color=” colors_current=” font_color_current=” toggle_icon_color_current=” background_current=” background_color_current=” background_gradient_current_direction=’vertical’ background_gradient_current_color1=” background_gradient_current_color2=” background_gradient_current_color3=” hover_colors=” hover_font_color=” hover_background_color=” hover_toggle_icon_color=” size-toggle=” av-medium-font-size-toggle=” av-small-font-size-toggle=” av-mini-font-size-toggle=” size-content=” av-medium-font-size-content=” av-small-font-size-content=” av-mini-font-size-content=” heading_tag=” heading_class=” alb_description=” id=” custom_class=” template_class=” av_uid=’av-l3okc1u4′ sc_version=’1.0′ admin_preview_bg=”] [av_toggle title=’Show Transcript:’ tags=” custom_id=” av_uid=’av-l3okc0ct’ sc_version=’1.0′] Natty Bumpercar 0:04 It finally happened. There I was unsuspecting, naive, maybe even. My youngest nine year old, came down with the COVID. He got the COVID The COVID is in the house and we put him in his room. We said Your, your now, Rapunzel bumper car up here in the room. Here’s a bell. Ring it if you need to look niggling in the evening, if you need food, whatever, ring twice. It’s very hard because this child he likes he likes to hug. He’s a hugger. Every day, I love you and He gives you hugs. And we couldn’t hug him. He was just over there. It was just like Ah, just put those in like a dual hug bank and then when you’re done you can just deposit withdraw all the hugs and then and then give us all the hugs. Please. Sad child. He was fine though. Honestly. He was living his best life. He was in his up in his in his is parapet, I think is maybe where he was we live in a castle. And he was he you know, had food delivered. He had all of his beverages and we would take them up and then we would take them away. We would had multiple screens where he could watch things he could play thing. Like he was doing great. His brother couldn’t get to him to attack him. So it was really I said, How are you feeling? Are you okay? And he’s like, Dad, this is the best vacation I’ve ever had. And I was like, Oh, wow, that’s really bad. Okay. Oh, we’ve been to the beach. No, we’ve been to some mountains. No. Been to a lake. But this is we’ve been to the big city museums. But this is this is this is it. This is the pinnacle. All right. Good to know, good to know. You’re easy, it’s easy to accommodate. Now I want everyone was in their rooms. So he was in his room. My wife was in was in our room. I took the couch with the other child who has a hard time sleeping by himself and the dogs. So we really, we were the core of the house. There were a lot of us down there. And on Wednesday night, what I’ve discovered is the dogs wake up several times a night several times a night. And they Oh, I was exhausted. This was Wednesday night. I was just like, I don’t feel good. I am exhausted because they got up at like 1131 33 Like every two hours or so. Banjo gets up and he was like, I gotta go outside. I’m like, okay, sometimes I’m like no business. Sometimes I do say okay, because if you don’t, he’s he. I mean he’s licking your face. He’s put his pawn yet. Like, hey, hey, and everything and so we got to get him outside. And he runs around in circles, Giants. Would you stop with the yipping in the yapping Producer 3:06 a natty I hate to burst into your story here but your three minutes and hey, I want to welcome everybody. Hello Radio Free Montclair. We’re actually recording this for them. So perhaps you should ask. I know normally on the show. You just kind of jump into a story and everyone’s supposed to catch up. Oh, yeah. But oh, ketchup. fries, ketchup. Right. But right now we want to welcome Hello, Radio Free Montclair. Natty Bumpercar 3:31 You’re right and I apologize. I Radio Free Montclair. This is me Natty Bumpercar at the bumper podcast here at headquarters, and we’re recording this episode. I’ve had three weeks of COVID related shenanigans in my brain that don’t work like it used to. And I was just I wanted to relay my story. Producer 3:52 Okay, perfect. You’re laying is starting the podcast for the radio Freeman. Claire and this one the viral and it’s good like you doing it. But you don’t have to tell us every single little thing you know, just kind of move the story forward. Go quickly and stuff. Natty Bumpercar 4:06 Yeah, I agree. I’m sorry. So kid, got it. And then third went there Wednesday night up. Thursday, I says to positive, didn’t feel great. Call the doctor. She sent me to the urgent care. They did another test. Well, actually, first, the doctor said why are you here? And I was like, because my doctor told me to come here. I didn’t I didn’t know what to I didn’t know what to do. And that’s always weird to me when you go to a doctor’s office and like well, why are you here? And it’s not like hi, how can I help you? Why are you here? It’s why are you here? You’re like, I don’t know. And so they put me on this Madsen deal stuff had crazy dreams like crazy dreams. Rufus T. Rufus 4:44 Sorry. This is me. Rufus to Rufus and I was brought over here by Allah wishes to let you know we cannot discuss the dreams the dreams are dreams and that crazy but they could still implicate some things if you understand what I’m saying. If you get My poor Alright, yeah, fine. Let’s just move along with your story. Natty Bumpercar 5:04 So fine. So the story is I stayed downstairs sleeping with no, I was upstairs for a while for a few days. And then because they put the they like put me in the door and they put tape tape on it to keep the sickness in or something. And after four days or so I ended up on the couch again with a kid and the dog. Why? Well, because the kid tested positive as well. And so now the wife is has sequestered herself up in her tiny little room and the other child was fine at that point go back to school, which is great. But the other child who had tested positive was now home going crazy because the children when they got it, they seem fine. It was you know, you hear stories of people are like God COVID It’s nothing. It’s just a cold and you’re like, No, it hits people in different ways. Did different there’s so many variables if you’re a kid, if you have red hair, if you get it on a Tuesday, I’ve heard it’s especially rough. If you eat Limburger cheese and just lingam or OWL other kinds of cheeses are fine, but if you eat that while you have it Oh, you’re a big trouble. So sorry shout out to the lingo burger Cheese Company. Didn’t mean to call you out. Is that really Lincoln? Burger? Not doesn’t feel kind of cheese. So it feels like a made up cheese Linnaean burger. Producer 6:26 That’s not right as Lynn burger lamb burger. It’s a smelly cheese and a lot of times they use in jokes, like an old cartoons and stuff. Limburger cheese, not Lincoln burger. You’re thinking of Lincoln berries. And then you’re putting that into cheese, which I don’t I mean, it could be possibly Yeah, just but I don’t know. Also, not particularly germane to the story, right? Natty Bumpercar 6:47 Who’s German? I’m kidding. Who’s Jemaine? That’s a joke. So while I was in bed, just crazy fevers, crazy fever, dreams, aches. I developed vertigo, which is where the world feels like it’s spinning around and but for me, they were like it they there was very specific language. They were like that have they have to unlock like, it’s like an a video game. If you go up to the guy and you say, I’d like to scroll, please. And he’s like, there is no scroll and you’re like, ah, I’d like to scroll of Lindenberger. And he’s like, Well, of course he has this scroll of thinking bug that’s how it is with doctors where if you don’t say the exact words and they’re like well this this doesn’t sound like it checks the boxes sorry champ. And so I was trying to describe it I was like, oh I can come up with was my brain feels like wow, wow, wow. Wow. Where it’s going in all different directions and my body feels like it’s going into different directions. They’re like so the room is spinning. And I was like no, it’s more than that. So much more my brain my body has taken dizziness to the to the to the 2020 twos and really has made it so much more than just oh the room is spinning like the room is spinning. That sounds like fun. Now what I was going through was wow what Wow. And it’s just something that we should be copywriting while we’re while we’re while because it’s fit feels like it has legs like something that we could definitely market and brand and get out there. Oh, this isn’t just grandpa’s dizziness. This is now well Wow. Wow. Wow. No. Yeah, I understand. It’s it’s certainly an idea. I love I you know, I love ideas. I love imagination, let people come up with things. But I think probably branding, a new version of dizziness isn’t really what we’re going to be doing. We’re not going to focus on that right now. If that’s okay, Oh, speaking of focusing on things. While I was sick, I managed to I wrote a short story. Friend of mine edited it, edited, edited it in it. It’s just under 1000 words, and I submitted it and it got rejected. And that’s great. That’s fine. It’s very exciting to me. I’ve never, I’ve had all these words in my brain. And sometimes I just have a really hard time getting them on to document and then actually having a friend to edit stuff is I need to I don’t know what you do with people who edit your things. I guess I’m gonna lock her in some sort of the barn here and I’ll bring her bas because people everyone knows people who edit. They love getting A’s. Anyway, and so I submitted that and then I also I made an online store for the CGA thing that I that I do Cedar Grove artists Alliance, and I made all the shirts I think I made like six different shirt variations designs and and and so that exists and I had to go through all the whole process when I when I first was doing web stuff a million years ago, setting up a store was like I’m at a store now it’s like really like there’s a lot But it’s like do you have your this thing? Do you have that thing? We can connect to this? Would you like for us to do this? And it’s all just like, oh, everything was like a huge learning process. But it exists and I actually forgot to have to launch it. Today. I was supposed to do it Monday. But then guess what? This week COVID came back COVID came back. Producer 10:18 I guess so glad you didn’t. I thought you’re gonna do like a song like, the COVID came back and you really don’t feel good. Or something like, Hey, write the cover EVs back. Hey, the coffee. These are the coffee. These are your Natty Bumpercar 10:36 coffee. These are okay. There. I love that producer was so excited to jump in with the AI is that his microphone wasn’t even on and then he kind of clicked in in the middle of it. That was very exciting. Good job. So yeah, I, it was a couple days ago. And listen, I’ve been talking to virtual doctors and I made a virtual Doctor wince. At one point. He was like, ah, when I told her what had been going on, and I said it you just wins. Because you don’t want to see people you don’t want to see wins. You don’t want to see pilots wins. You don’t want to see doctors wins. And you don’t want to see Carson wins. Hell, it’s a football joke. I don’t know who he is, but I know that name. And it just popped into my head anyway. So basically, I ended up in the emergency room for the stuff I still have. They gave me fluids, they gave me medicine. They gave me something called an anti vert vertigo, and everything checks out. I had an EKG and they said that I sound great, which makes me happy. And when they tried to give me the anti vert I said Ooh, wouldn’t be funny if it was an anti Bert. And then they were like what and I was like Hooper. And they were like No, no. Producer 11:49 Yeah, doctors aren’t typically known for their senses of humor. They find your funny. Hey, oh, Natty Bumpercar 11:55 let’s wrap it up with a funny bone joke. Outro 12:09 The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show, and you’d like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at https colon forward slash forward slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty Bumpercar also pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere. post about it on all of the social medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is produced at headquarters in coffee can alley it’s recorded mixed and produced by producer. The bumper podcast features contributions from Aloysius jpg Rufus T Rufus doodle poodle, robot trunks and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty Bumpercar. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty bumpercar.com/subscribe Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Natty Bumpercar Hugs and hearts See you soon. NonPro 13:29 This has been a non productive media presentation, executive producer Franco Blaue. This program and many others like it on the nonproductive network is distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution non commercial no derivatives license. Please share it but ask before trying to change it or sell it. For more information visit non dash productive.com Transcribed by https://otter.ai [/av_toggle] [/av_toggle_container]

May 28, 2022
Bumperpodcast #391 – Season 2 – Money

Natty is back to his old tricks. Monster shows up, as do a bunch of other people – and, they all want their money!

The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!! Also, also, we have a Patreon page now!!! https://www.patreon.com/nattybumpercar

About This Episode

In this hilarious episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar discovers he's in serious financial trouble. What starts as a casual conversation with Monster quickly escalates when Rufus T. Rufus arrives to settle a debt—by making Natty pay it. Things spiral out of control as Reginald reveals contractual obligations, Doodle Poodle mentions unpaid commissions, and even Producer refuses to work until he's paid. By the end, Natty realizes he owes money to practically everyone in the studio. The episode features witty wordplay about character names and a running gag about Reginald being a "classically trained actor" who's actually a pipe fitter.

Memorable Quotes

“Let me get this straight, I owe Rufus money, Rufus owes Monster money, I owe Reginald money and I owe Pig money. So it feels like other than you Monster, I owe everyone in this room money.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“The more plays, the more pays you know.”
— Rufus T. Rufus

“I can't come in right now because Natty owes me too much money and so I'm not going to do any work.”
— Producer

Topics: #money #debt #friendship #deception #contracts #employment #chaos #misunderstandings

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Doodle Poodle, Producer

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: Hey monster, what's going on? What a surprise. I wasn't expecting you here today you don't say that's crazy I didn't know about that are you serious hey are we really so this we're just gonna go back to the with the month monsters here now I get it I get it but I had no issue with you monster you're great you're great a guest you're very clean you're very punctual however we were trying to take the podcast into a completely different direction that they got you know like to have to have it make sense it's season two now we've grown up and we we wanted to have a plan and yeah I just didn't know that we were already well at uh monster level yeah well I I was I I was trying to take things back like old school you know like really bring it back and because right for a long time right now it's been like me you Rufus uh Reginald yeah Reginald do you know him

Doodle Poodle: really I had no idea

Natty Bumpercar: so you guys went to the same school together that's that's that's are you a classically trained actor the way he is I can't believe we're doing this really he's not even a classically trained actor you guys went to trade school you're you're you're a pipe fitter I had no I this is my mind is blown I hired him uh or you like see whatever a couple episodes ago to play future me and because he said he was a classically trained actor and now I find out that that he's not and the trades obviously are a great way to go to school and great thing to learn and uh you know to have a future but he's it could completely lie to me he pulled the wool over my eyes ears he pulled the wool over my head how does that work he pulled the wool over your eyes and ears

Doodle Poodle: well actually actually I'm not it's me and sometimes people say that I I look like a little bit like a uh a lamb who has wool because I have a poodle and I have curly hair

Natty Bumpercar: that's actually a good point yeah yeah well of course and I think people understand that but yeah you're right doodle poodle you do look a little bit like a lamb because of the curly hair but you know your name is doodle poodle and so it kind of throws off the whole game like people know that you're a poodle who likes to do

Doodle Poodle: it's very little people know that you're a pig because your name is right so um uh so doodle

Natty Bumpercar: poodle I think what he was saying is you actually have what you are a poodle and what you like to do to doodle in your name uh his name is Aloysius J Pig so I mean yeah there is that defining he's a pig in his name but Aloysius isn't really uh yeah exactly everyone so my name is uh Rufus T Rufus and that would be like if my name was uh expert something like that you understand so doodle poodle you are a doodle who poodles and uh excuse me I gotta flip that on its side you are a poodle who doodles uh Aloysius you are of course the star of the show the big man of the hour loving it up loving the power yeah dude wait I got confused sorry I messed my rhyme that's okay no I thought you were really you were you sound like you're about to really uh bust out some jams as the kids are saying these days hey Rufus nice to see you what have you been up to well as a point of contention as a point of bonafide uh monster over here uh I owe him uh of some money and I decided to stop on by normally I would stop on by the other way by not stopping on by but today I decided to uh to rectify to uh reconfigure to you know to do hard jobs uh uh obloviate a bit uh on the facts in the matter at hand ipso facto and and and and pay the man back you're actually gonna pay him back you've never paid me back you've owed me money for like uh decades like millennia like a long time mighty long time and i don't feel like i've ever even seen a penny from you like you you make we've been out to dinner where you had the opportunity just to pick up my tab to pay me back and you still you wouldn't even do that you you you you snuck out the back and left me with a bill which then made you owe me more money all right okay okay okay let's all just calm down a little bit here uh whoo so holy cow um i lost my train of thought that growl was very intense uh uh uh monster um but i'm glad rufus that you came by to to settle up your debt i think that's a great thing for you to do it's it's like an all-new rufus paying off debts so um speaking of paying off uh debts natty uh you actually uh here's my bill for services rendered and uh if you could just pay me in cash right now that what i'm gonna do is just slide those stacks over the monster and uh you're gonna be clear then i'm gonna be clear and then we're all gonna be clear understand okay now i now i kind of see what's happening wait okay so i i don't i owe you money i don't think i owe you what service is rendered what are we talking about well i looked over the patreon uh patreon.com natty bumper car and there was some legal issues i had to attend to uh and then there was the contract of uh rosenkrantz or guildenstern whatever his name was wait you just made me forget his name when you did that you're rufus rosen how did you just did you just messed up my brain now i can't remember his name hello everyone it's me reginald it's very happy to see everyone here and monsters what it's i can't believe i haven't seen you since university meow meow meow well yes indubitably indeed i i understand that yes there is some uh money some funds that are owed to me and i'd greatly appreciate if i could get my hands on wait so who owes you money reginald well see now natty that's what i came to discuss with you so according to these contracts which have your uh uh uh signature on the bottom uh he he was due to be paid a significant amount of money some funds you understand so wait so i owe him money well yeah so it's it's a little confusing but actually anytime the episode is played he's supposed to get a cut you understand so you got his flat fee and then every time an episode is played he gets some uh a little bit of money and uh i didn't want to you know it's good news but the the podcast is is doing well and it's charting around the world around the planet people are listening to it's australia how you doing i got south korea i think it was how you're doing all right so we're doing wonderfully uh however the bad side the downside is the more plays the more pays you know let me get this straight i've been on this show for 390 to 91 episodes i never got any money and all of a sudden this dude who uh came in and and tricked us he's getting money for every time somebody listens it doesn't make any sense rufus you're my lawyer and you're taking care of this

Doodle Poodle: guy not me right so i feel like i need a little bit of money too is what i'm saying i literally

Natty Bumpercar: don't even know why we do this podcast anymore so let me get this straight uh i owe rufus money rufus owes monster money i owe reginald money and i owe pig money so it feels like other than you monster i owe everyone in this room money which is just ridiculous wait are you serious i thought i paid you back for that so i owe you for that too come on this is for a timeshare deal that monster and i went on so now i owe everyone does anyone owe me any money uh no natty no no no uh no one owes you anything all right you're just you're lucky to have us here you're lucky that we're uh even engaged because you know with the uh financial situation as it is and you being uh out of pocket quite a bit let's just say it's not a ideal situation can we delete that that that whole channel every time somebody records on that layer it does we can only get one channel i don't understand what's happening there but we got to fix that producer can you come in and can you can you work on this

Producer: thing i can't come in right now because natty owes me too much money and so i'm not going to do any work it's a work of sin i'm not going to do any work it's a work of sin i'm not going to do any work it's a work of sin

Natty Bumpercar: so now i owe producer money too awesome doodle poodle how are we are we pretty uh pretty square

Doodle Poodle: we pretty good actually i wasn't gonna bring it up but i was working on a commission of a portrait that you were you hired me for and you said you were gonna pay me part of it up front so i could

Natty Bumpercar: get materials and you never did and cool cool cool uh all right well then you know what i'm gonna go get a second job and i'm gonna go get a second job and i'm gonna go get a second job or if you guys want to go to patreon.com slash natty bumper car and join that'd be amazing because evidently i've got bills to pay hey it's good to see everyone thrilled we're doing the podcast i'm natty bumper car and you my little bumper pod casketeers are the best things in the world

Unknown: this has been a non-productive media presentation executive producer frank hablaui this program and many others like it on the non-productive network is distributed under a creative commons attribution non-commercial no derivatives license please share it but ask before trying to change it or sell it for more information visit non-productive.com

Doodle Poodle: you

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April 7, 2021
Bumperpodcast #386 – A new microphone

Natty is still stuck in a car – but, now he has a new microphone. He also has no lunch …. The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals! You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening! Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!!

About This Episode

Natty Bumpercar and Aloysious J. Pig discuss the podcast's irregular recording schedule in this hilariously chaotic episode. Pig discovers he's been getting paid while Natty works for mere 'exposure,' leading to a debate about artist compensation featuring negotiated payment in tacos and quesadillas. Rufus T. Rufus weighs in on contracts and accounting while managing to mangle the names of Pig's other show's characters. The gang touches on missed episodes, Halloween stories that are now too old to tell, and lost computers before wrapping up with detailed nacho orders and pandemic safety reminders.

Memorable Quotes

“Exposure doesn't buy me any tacos”
— Aloysious J. Pig

“We're paying you with experience. This is a high profile gig, which means you're getting a lot of eyeballs, a lot of ears on your product.”
— Rufus T. Rufus

“You gotta pay the talent and everybody knows that I'm the talent. I can make a little song, I could do a little dance, I could tell a couple jokes.”
— Aloysious J. Pig

Topics: #comedy #podcasting #artistcompensation #contracts #food #recordingschedules #friendship

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Producer

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: well well well if it isn't the bumper podcast the uh once every uh three or four weeks uh podcast that happens sometimes exciting news uh we got a little microphone that plugs into the computer so that as i'm sitting in the car i don't know if you listened to the last episode it was so long ago i barely remember it myself but i can i can sit in the car and and try to record these things because uh the issue being uh i'm sitting in my car a lot i don't have access to uh the studio back at headquarters and uh so i um hey bumper car what's going on everybody everybody it's my friend pig aloesius jay pig what's going on aloesius jay pig that's a great song and everything uh i was wondering about this new recording schedule do i still get paid the same amount wait wait what you get paid to do the bumper i didn't know that who's signing those checks well as you can imagine netty uh it's our rufus t rufus actually comes in and signs the ledger the signs the does the accounting that does the uh balance into the books as it were and i haven't charge of uh human resources well we have human resources accounting uh-huh let's see the legal department yeah that makes sense as i do that as well and uh got my i got my uh fingers in a lot of pies as as as it were oh cool so i mean i guess that begs the question if if pig is getting does that mean that like i get paid as well well that's that's a terrific question uh for you to ask uh i don't know if you've looked at your contract lately but uh what we're paying you with is experience we're paying you this is a high profile uh gig uh as as they say and that means you're getting a lot of eyeballs a lot of ears on your product which means you get to promote yourself you understand so are you getting paid yes insofacto you are getting paid long term this is a long game of getting your uh name out there uh for people to go and then purchase whatever products you have or whatever it is i honestly natty it's you you got the best of both worlds you get to come on the bubba podcast you get to do your thing and then people everybody out there everybody in the world did like oh natty bumper car i gotta go get me some of that bumper car whatever you know your uh what is it your uh yogurt whatever yum yum sure sure yeah uh yeah so it's really getting getting your name out there and that's that's worth more than any money you could ever buy you i would think i i i kind of disagree i mean i kind of see what you guys are saying um that seems to happen a lot with uh artists and uh comedian whatever kind of you know like entrepreneur like not opportune uh entertainers where people are like hey you want to come do my show and you're like yeah sure uh you know what's what does it pay and they say oh this is a non-paying gig but just think of all the exposure you're gonna get and you're like exposure doesn't buy me any tacos now hold on a second as i just heard you say if you'd like to be paid in tacos then we can certainly cut back on some of the exposure because you know we do promote this and uh maybe work that out with a chimichanga a chalupa something like that a little taco action a burrito uh maybe a i don't know a chalupa a quesadilla i know we could do that as well i know we had a uh a uh an entertainer uh that we used to pay in uh in in in in in quesadilla and he was very happy with the deal uh and my uh contract that uh lunch is actually provided and you're talking about all this food if i could get just a plate of nachos today wait i would very much appreciate it are you kidding me you have you get lunch and you get paid this is how how who who is who did your contract this doesn't make any sense to me like i it's the bumper podcast i am natty bumper car and so it's named after me me and here we go always comes back to the name listen natty you gotta pay the talent and everybody knows that i'm the talent i can make a little song i could do a little dance i could tell a couple jokes okay i do jokes everybody's here for pig well yeah but um i mean i guess a lot of people are here for me too probably i mean like for instance we've been recording so infrequently that i have all kinds of cool fun stories like i could talk about halloween yeah so halloween already happened and uh some people aren't gonna be interested because it was a while it was you know it's last week so it's like that's old news so you gotta maybe uh think of something else um what about oh ah what about i don't think i told anybody about when we lost the computer and what a big you know deal that turned into and and and how crazy that was for a few days right i uh again it was like it was it feels like that was like a year ago and maybe more i don't know it was a long time ago i think we can agree on that right i don't well i don't think it was it was quite that long ago but i mean i guess it was a little while ago but it was such a crazy story that i thought that people might want to hear it or i don't know i could talk about like the outdoor comedy shows that you know i've done a few i don't want to step on your toes but it's kind of like a whatever floats your boat type of situation uh bumper car uh me you know i like uh to take every opportunity every show to kind of uh you know i i call it i say kick out the jams raise the roof i don't like to rehash i don't like to go back in time i like to look forward in time if you understand okay a little bit of time i don't like to go back in time i like to look forward in time little pig progress is what i'm all about okay um yeah you really have deflated you've deflated me taking the wind out of my sails here aloysius um oh i forgot to tell you too there are some people who have missed you uh and or are asking me how you have been doing uh yeah who's somebody's asking you about me yeah i hope you're not telling you don't talk to you what do you say because i know i'm interested in in that which we're in a whole new world right now who exactly is asking you about me i mean based on your current reaction i don't think i feel like giving out any names but just people who are concerned they haven't seen you you you just abruptly stopped doing uh hanging out with pig and pals and you know because we haven't been recording the podcast as often like people are just kind of just like where's where's pig haven't seen pig and uh that's really all they asked me that it's not anything beyond that it's just like where is pig is pig okay we miss pig now i believe i can step in here uh pig is currently under contract contractual uh re-mitigation for hanging out with pig and pals and we're trying to figure out how to bring the show back because we understand that it was beloved as in the community in the whole world somebody once said it brings a light to the day in the darkness and especially now that you know it's dark when you wake up and it's dark when you go to bed we need more light we need more aloes we need more uh i don't know all the other little friends that come along there's i don't know uh timmy maybe uh zippy phil i don't know the names necessarily but you know there's like a horse a frog whoever it is but uh a lot of dinosaurs i remember that but anyway we're we're we're working behind the scenes to see what we can get done okay i i love uh rufus the names i don't think you even got one right you're like oh you know we got marshmallow we got uh an animal cracker we got uh um uh shampoo random things i love shampoo i like i like zippy and skippy no it's a good one i think uh oh well okay well then that makes me happy and i think maybe that and also people missed you because you were doing the uh open mic you were sneaking in at the end of the open mic when it was virtual and to the cedar beans show and and that hasn't been happening virtually lately and so uh people have been missing you there too so i mean i you know you were really out there and you were there for a while pig and uh feels like you've kind of pulled back a little bit which is totally understandable you got a lot on your plate yes she's like an eating thing like you say i eat too much food no that's not what it was at all i was just saying you you have a lot that you're responsible for maybe i guess that's what i'm trying to say um anyway cool uh yeah so listen bumper car i'm glad you're here i'm glad you got this this cool new microphone that we can try to do shows with so hopefully you'll be able to hear me you can start doing more shows then people will get more pig which will make more people happy um and again uh i don't know who's responsible for getting my lunch today rufus but nachos would be nice with some black olives some cheese i don't no sour cream please it makes the chips kind of yucky uh guacamole do it like that a couple of onions you know uh and uh tomatoes some uh uh uh what's that it called picante no it's uh it's uh it's salsa picante what am i thinking what's picante i don't know i don't know you know how i like it just my my normal order so i'm uh i guess if we're doing lunch orders that i'm actually pretty hungry as well so i would love to get in on this pig it was great talking to you and i uh no no so natty you actually remember you don't get lunch on your contract you don't get nothing you get no zero okay zilch okay nada all right all right so you maybe you can share off a pig's plate or get something else okay so i guess no lunch for me but i'm glad we just recorded an episode i hope you're doing well we've missed you tremendously please stay safe um keep social distancing keep wearing masks wash your paws wash your claws wash your hands woman and man we got to get through this and the only way we're going to get through this is together bumper podcast this has been a non-productive media presentation executive producer frank

Producer: hablaui this program and many others like it on the non-productive network is distributed under a creative commons attribution non-commercial no derivatives license please share it but ask before trying to change it or not or sell it for more information visit non-productive.com

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November 5, 2020
Bumperpodcast #382 – Sal Salesman

Who is Sal Salesman – and what plans does he have for Natty and the Bumperpodcast?! The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals! You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening! Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!!

About This Episode

In episode 382 of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar's recording session takes a dark turn when the aggressive salesman Sal Salesman bursts in and criticizes everything about the podcast. Sal demands Natty hire a full staff, implement SEO strategies, and completely overhaul the show's operations. When Rufus T. Rufus attempts to defend Natty, he's tricked into signing a contract that gives Sal control of the podcast. The episode ends with a shocking twist: Aloysius J. Pig reveals he invited Sal Salesman and has worked with him before, leading to chaos as Rufus storms off and the future of the Bumperpodcast hangs in the balance.

Memorable Quotes

“You come to a locked door and you start to cry. I come to doors and they're locked and I kick those doors open and I give myself super excellent opportunities.”
— Sal Salesman

“This podcast is just about friends getting together and hanging out. If it takes off one day, great. But if it doesn't, totally fine.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“This is a tiny pond and there's only room for one shark here. And that shark's name is Sal Salesman.”
— Sal Salesman

Topics: #podcasting #business #betrayal #contracts #seo #friendship #takeover #comedy

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Aloysius J. Pig, Producer

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: Bumper podcast it's me not a bumper car and I'm so happy to be here I'm so thrilled because I don't know that feels like the podcast is going in the right direction like people are listening and you know we're on we're on the nonproductive.com like their network now and and and I'm this is my second week in a row recording thanks life for letting me do my podcast and it's just everything feels like your podcast is garbage yes who are you why are you here why are you being mean to me

Aloysius J. Pig: just look around yourself you see this is not even a studio it's just a basement and your podcast

Natty Bumpercar: no one listens to it do you even have any s-t-o s-t-o what is s-t-o s-e-o oh I don't know if I have any s-t-o I just know that I come down here and yeah it is a basement but it's also my studio and I record my podcast every week and it's the bumper podcast and I don't know oh yeah exactly you don't know you don't know anything all you do is come down here

Aloysius J. Pig: yeah with all your little friends every week and this is what you have nothing to show for

Natty Bumpercar: that's not true I have a lot to show for this is my 382nd episode and people seem to like my show and they seem to listen to it and yeah my little friend my little friend my little friend my little friend Say hello to my little friends I was having a good day I was having a good day Anyway You're going to stop doing this podcast Until you figure out exactly what you're doing What your five year goal is And what your angle is And what your perspective is And what your niche is None of these things exist On your show That's not, well, it's the Bumper Podcast It's all about Coffee Can Alley And all the shenanigans that happen here at Headquarters With me, Natty Bumpercar Everyone's favorite comedian And his friends Aloysius J. Pig Rufus T. Rufus shows up Doodle Poodle Robot is even I don't know where Robot is right now, honestly But what do we It's just a fun show We don't have to have Perspective and niche And all these Who are you anyway? You haven't even told me Oh my My name is Salesman Sal And I'm here to offer you A deal of a lifetime A deal of the century A deal that will make your podcast Pop in ways that it currently Does not Okay, you're a salesman? You're the worst salesman I've ever talked to in my entire life Salesmen aren't supposed to be mean I don't, why did Why did you come in mean? You're supposed to like, if you want to sell me Something, it seems like you would come in nicely You don't know anything about the magic Of sales Do you, do you Look at me in the eyes and tell me That you do because you can't Because you don't What? You're now hiring Hiring? You're hiring No Put the ad out Go on the web and hire someone I'm not gonna hire anyone I don't make any money from doing the podcast Why do I need to start hiring people? Why do I need a staff? You need to go hire someone But you're gonna start taking notes And you're going to publish them With every episode And you're going to do SEO So do we know what that stands for At this point? It stands for super Excellent Opportunities I'm pretty sure it doesn't stand for that At all, but keep going With your sales bitch Now that you're here and you have me Hostage, you might as well just get it All out By the way How did you get here? How did you get here? How did you get in here? I come to doors I come to doors and they're closed I come to doors and they're locked And I kick those doors open And I give myself Super excellent opportunities Because I am made of S-E-O Something that you clearly don't understand You come to a locked door And you start to cry I don't start to cry When I come to a locked door I might get my keys out I might knock I might push the door about me But I don't cry Unless you're talking about that one time That I went to the ice cream shop And it clearly said that it was open And that the doors were locked And I could see people inside And they wouldn't let me in to eat ice cream Is that what you're talking about? That is not what I am talking about You're going to hire someone to also Along with your notes Along with your S-E-O To make new graphics New images For your videos For every single show You're going to have to hire people To distribute your podcast Around the world To all the ears that will listen to it An ad salesman will be hired as well What? You're going to need an office manager How many people are you expecting me to hire? I can't afford this I can't even afford one person Let alone like the five or six people That you just mentioned This podcast is just about friends Getting together and hanging out Alright? If it takes off one day, great But if it doesn't, totally fine Alright? I mean, I can't I'm not going to hire like a whole So you're saying I need To make show notes Which, okay, all these things are actually I've read are good ideas But show notes New graphics for every episode Get into podcast directorates That was something that you mentioned Kind of, I guess Yes And then the office manager Which I don't really I don't really know how that helps Or what that's for Do you even have a contest, Maven? Who does all your contests? Do you even do contests? Do you have merch? Do you do any of these things? How do you expect people to find you And listen to your podcast If you haven't even done any? Do you have a social Engineering team? A development arm Of your podcast? An application? You have nothing You don't even have a cleaning crew Down here, do you? I don't have a cleaning crew And your voice just kind of changed To European somehow I don't I was all happy at the beginning of the day And now I'm finding out all these things That I don't have And I was happy before I realized I didn't have them But now I'm like, oh, jeez I need to have all these things To make my podcast the best podcast it can possibly be You still haven't told me your name My name is on my business card Which I have put in front of you ten minutes ago Before you even started yammering on I put it on top of the pile of papers Which are your contract Now hold on, hold on, hold on One second here Did I hear the word contract bump a car? Yeah, Rufus, help Uh-huh Yeah Now who is this gentleman here on this, uh I don't know his name Dom suit suit That he's wearing in my establishment Until here You listen here to me, sir You have no idea Who you are You have no idea Who you are messing with I am podcasts I am the one I am the person Who is going to take this podcast To the stars And I am also going to take it away If he doesn't listen So, Rufus, really quickly Just to catch you up This guy just came in while I was about to record the podcast And he started making all these threats And saying I was doing everything wrong with the podcast He wants me to hire a whole team of people Which you know I can't do Because you have all my friends And all my money in your back pocket And I need help, please You're not allowed to carry your money around Because you get it stuck to the bubble gum And then it's all stuck together And we can't use it anymore Do you remember that? How much money we've lost over the years, Bumpercar? A lot of it A lot of it Exactly So, anyway, sir Again, let me just look at your car Your name is Sal Salesman? That's your name? Huh Well, I'm Rufus T. Rufus And I am the legal counsel for the Bumpercar Club Bumper podcast and headquarters And Coffee Can Alley Impromptu, impromptu And so I would appreciate if you'd stop harassing and haranguing my client It's inappropriate It's uncalled for And it's unnecessary We've got this podcast under wraps and under control And so I'm gonna ask you Not once, not twice But zero times To please exsort the room Get out with yourself It's very interesting that you've looked at my car Because what you don't understand is that Common new business practices are It's a trap Just by lifting my card up You have signed the contract, Rufus T. Rufus And so now I am the lawyer I am the SEO maven I am the contract contractual I, Sal Salesman Own this account and everything involved with it And so moving forward my lawyer friend You are the one who will be leaving You are the one who no longer belongs here No Good day, sir Rufus I say, good day No, Rufus, what are you just walking away for? Don't worry, Bumpercar I got this I've been down before I've been down before I've been down before But I am not out I will figure this out And I will be back I promise you This Sal Salesman, he's no lawyer He doesn't understand the law What he understands is money And taking money away from people And that's not what I'm about Rufus I will return Oh Natty, hey, it's me, Aloysius J. Pig What are you crying about? Why, like, this time? I mean, is that why they're all Hey! Sal Salesman, you came Good to see you Yes, I came and I saw And I took over I now run this show, Aloysius So thank you for the invitation I very much appreciate it It'll be good working with you again Wait a minute Big twist Aloysius, you're the one who brought this Sal Salesman into the show And you've worked with him before? I thought you and I And especially I thought you and Rufus, T. Rufus, were friends How could you do this to Rufus? Hold on, we're good Everything's fine, everything's okay Sal, I think you're just gonna work in concert with Rufus, right? No, Sal, this is a tiny pond And there's only room for one shark here And that shark's name is Sal Salesman And so, no more room

Aloysius J. Pig: What have I done? Oh, no, Rufus! Rufus, I gotta go catch him Bumper car, you gotta figure this out Rufus!

Natty Bumpercar: Okay, um, I'm so confused right now But you listen to me, Sal Salesman Other people have come into this show and tried to take it over And they've failed every single time And I don't really know who you are or what you're about Well, wait a minute The one that really tried to take it over was Rufus, T. Rufus And he did have a lot of control in the end Huh I mean We're gonna fight you the whole way But I can't promise you that we're gonna win And that this isn't your show now And, ah, I'm not really good at these speeches But next week we're gonna figure this out I promise you, Sal Salesman Indeed we shall Indeed we shall Oh Oh Oh

Producer: This has been a non-productive media presentation Executive producer, Frank Hablawi This program and many others like it on the Non-Productive Network Is distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution Non-Commercial No-Derivatives License Please share it, but ask before trying to change it or sell it For more information, visit non-productive.com

Aloysius J. Pig: For more information, visit non-productive.com For more information, visit non-productive.com

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July 17, 2020
Bumperpodcast #381 – Moving

What in the world is going on in the studio? What are Rufus and Pig up to – and how is Doodle Poodle involved?! The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals! You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening! Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!!

About This Episode

In episode 381 of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar returns to the studio only to find Rufus T. Rufus and Aloysious J. Pig attempting to shut it down and convert it into a hot yoga studio. Doodle Poodle had been recruited to distract Natty while the move happened, but the plan fails spectacularly. Natty explains his recent absence was due to pandemic challenges, homeschooling, and dealing with his dog Popcorn's separation anxiety. The episode features hilarious confusion over whether they're discussing hot yoga or hot yogurt, and Natty announces the podcast's exciting new partnership with nonproductive.com. Trunks from Pig and Pals also makes a brief appearance in this chaotic return to regular programming.

Memorable Quotes

“Did you just say yoga or yogurt because hot yoga yogurt does not sound appealing or appetizing to me or anyone on the planet.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“We're in the middle of a pandemic there's a lot going on, the kids are home, we're trying to work, we're trying to be teachers.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“It's a bumper podcast bumper as you will.”
— Aloysious J. Pig

Topics: #podcastnetworks #contracts #studiodrama #pandemiclife #yoga #yogurt #doodlepoodle #yumya

Featuring: Aloysious J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, Natty Bumpercar, Doodle Poodle, Trunks, Producer

Full Transcript

Aloysious J. Pig: uh yeah so you're just gonna want to move all those shelves over to the near the door

Rufus T. Rufus: perfect perfect and uh be sure that they don't mess up any of that paperwork that's inside of those uh cabinets because they are very important to the whole situation yeah yeah yeah okay of

Aloysious J. Pig: course so guys just be what he said just be obviously be careful with everything you're moving look at that lamp it can go also get a water cooler it's all this is all gonna go out

Rufus T. Rufus: front okay hey guys what's well what's what's going on now uh hey uh natty bumper car uh well so what we're doing here is we're gonna clean out the studio uh it's not a money maker you understand and uh we're gonna turn it into a hot yoga studio did you just say yoga or yogurt because

Aloysious J. Pig: hot yoga yogurt does not sound uh appealing or appetizing to me or anyone on the planet i think he said hot

Natty Bumpercar: yoga but i i do agree that hot yogurt sounds unpleasant um but why are we getting rid of this studio and why are we doing anything right now why who are these guys and why are they moving

Rufus T. Rufus: now i pig i was under the assumption that the dog uh the poodle dog was gonna be uh occupying natty's time during this transition what what happened with that exactly uh i don't

Aloysious J. Pig: know the last i heard that they were they was going out to uh to make some doodles and as they as the dog doodle poodle does and now but he's here so i can't i've been trying to text doodle poodle on the phone and i have not been able to get through to him so okay so this makes a little

Natty Bumpercar: bit more sense now because doodle poodle came to my room this morning and he was like oh my god i'm he said that we had to go on a doodling adventure he said and made me pack my bag and he said we're gonna be out all day and i was like well this is strange like i i hang out with doodle poodle every so often but this seemed like he was he had a a real strange intensity about him yeah and i um i was wondering what was going on and now i'm back and wondering even more what's going on

Rufus T. Rufus: yeah well uh pig as soon as you get doodle poodle on the line just uh hold on for a second i gotta talk to him but listen uh natty we didn't want to have to do this to you in person but you uh have stopped doing the bumper podcast on a regular basis you understand and uh ipso facto in your uh uh eternium your uh agreement here your uh law abiding uh paperwork uh your uh contract yeah your contract exactly i was having a hard time he uh you we we if you don't occupy the space of the studio at least three weeks out of the month that's three episodes per month no uh for more than two months then we uh we have to sell everything and shut it down as are you

Natty Bumpercar: serious like we're in the middle of a pandemic there's a lot going on the week we're their kids are home we're trying to work we're trying to be teachers i'm trying to be you know the my we haven't taken the dog to the therapist lately so i'm trying to help her out with all of her issues do she can't be home alone by herself did you know this she she gets anxiety she gets very worried separation anxiety that's what it's called and that's what i've been dealing with and the dog every time i leave the room i hear this not even a bark she says murph my name isn't murph what does murph mean murph murph i don't know i never heard the dog say murph before it's very strange this is popcorn right yes this is popcorn and it just i'm sorry that i haven't put out episodes as as normally as i usually do lately but it's just so much on my plate and it's i'm overwhelmed i'm not i'm not even well

Rufus T. Rufus: well well well well well well well well well well well yeah yeah classic episode that was classic bumper podcast right there

Natty Bumpercar: thanks and it's i'm i'm just i can you guys stop moving stuff please thank you so here's the other thing is we got picked up by a podcast network so we're gonna be on on nonproductive.com which is super cool and I talked to Frank over there and he wants to start putting the episodes out over there and that's awesome because you know that's a cool thing more people are going to listen to this I guess that's their problem not mine

Rufus T. Rufus: now that is a good point pig it sounds like that's a them kind of problem but now I have a me kind of problem you're falling into agreements with other people without any sort of contract is there anything I need to read maybe anything I need to sign I could endorse it with my signature I could you know put a stamp on it maybe a seal something like that

Natty Bumpercar: no I talked to Frank again he was very nice and I gave them I mean this is getting into the weeds but the RSS feed which is how people find the podcast and then he's going to put it on the network and then we have a little bumper at the end of the episode

Aloysious J. Pig: oh like the bumper podcast so it's just another bumper for the bumper podcast it's a bumper podcast bumper as you will

Natty Bumpercar: yes exactly and uh good point and uh

Aloysious J. Pig: oh it's doodle poodle I'm going to put him on speaker one second

Doodle Poodle: it's me doodle poodle I don't know I don't know where natty went we were out on the field and we were going to make some doodles

Rufus T. Rufus: he's here doodle poodle he's here

Doodle Poodle: oh he's back there huh I'm really sorry

Rufus T. Rufus: well you had one job doodle poodle you had one one job which was to keep natty bumper car occupied and you didn't do it necessarily and so he came back here and he found out what we're doing here in the studio which means no hot yogurt for you my doggy friend

Natty Bumpercar: I'm pretty sure that we decided that it was hot yoga yoga not yogurt because again the idea of hot yogurt it doesn't appeal to me I like cold yogurt cold I do

Aloysious J. Pig: so hey speaking of yogurt bumper car how's that yumya treating you have you been mass producing and mass manufacturing yumya over at see the bean

Doodle Poodle: oh yeah natty I forgot about yumya I was supposed to help you to make a logo right we're gonna doodle a logo for yumya yumya yumya

Natty Bumpercar: I know it's fun to say guys doodle poodle don't worry about it we already figured out kind of a logo type of thing but thank you for your help and also doodle poodle I'm so sad that you were involved with pig and rufus like I expect this from rufus I kind of have started to expect this from pig as well but from you why are you part of this plan

Doodle Poodle: they promised me that I could have some hot yogurt no it's yoga any kind of yogurt

Natty Bumpercar: it's yoga we established that yeah it's yogurt

Doodle Poodle: I don't like to do yoga it hurts my is it yoga

Rufus T. Rufus: or yogurt

Aloysious J. Pig: this is so confusing

Rufus T. Rufus: this is all very confusing but I gotta say gentlemen you can keep up with work because we are paying you by the hour so just go ahead and take all the shelves over there those chairs will stack on each other for easiest storage and movability

Natty Bumpercar: so we're not stacking everybody stop you guys can go home we have to pay you okay just hold on a second I will come pay you I'll write you a check and listen we're not moving anything we're not closing down the studio there's not going to be any hot yoga certainly no hot yoga hot yogurt because again we are on nonproductive.com and they're going to have our podcast and it's very exciting and we're going to be recording more often and you know it's going to be great so this is the bumper podcast I am Natty Bumpercar you were hearing Rufus T. Rufus who is the lawyer around here you were hearing Aloysius J. Pig who is I guess the pig around here you were hearing Doodle Poodle the poodle who doodles because we're so literal and there's all kinds of other characters who are going to come around but we can't wait for you guys to get involved in all the shenanigans here at Coffee Can Alley we do make yum-yum it's kind of a yogurt-y treat it's pretty delicious we have this podcast every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday Aloysius J. Pig there he and his pals they have a show called Hanging Out with Pig and Pals we're real busy we're working on illustrating a book for a friend of mine there's a lot of shenanigans going on over here I know that's the second time that I've said it I may say it a third time I won't, don't worry but here's the thing we're excited to be back we've missed you and um

Rufus T. Rufus: now here I have this paper over here that I need you to look at and read just to make sure that we are in agreement that you understand that 50% occupancy or else this room this studio as it were will be returned to its original state which is of course the yogurt shop no it's yoga

Aloysious J. Pig: yoga

Doodle Poodle: that sounds like toga toga like we're gonna have a big party or something I love parties parties are the most fun thing in the whole wide world

Natty Bumpercar: I I love parties and fine Rufus I'll read over this contract again but we're fine we're gonna we're gonna keep pumping out episodes this is episode 381 do you understand how amazing that is this podcast has been around longer than the children longer than the dog yep okay this is

Rufus T. Rufus: it's got legs that's true I hope it it's got legs knows how to it's a song yeah

Aloysious J. Pig: that was really good that was really close to copyright infringement for a lawyer I gotta say and it sounds please don't ever sing again Rufus that was painful

Natty Bumpercar: to my sweet little ears uh ooh speaking of sweet little ears I forgot hey um from pig and pals hey trunks get over here I wanna hear from you real quick

Trunks: yeah yeah everybody it's me trunks and I don't know if I'm supposed to do the weather report over here or what exactly but um it's nice to see you I can't wait to have some hot yogurt

Natty Bumpercar: alright everybody this has been the bumper podcast I am natty bumper car to everyone from nonproductive.com welcome aboard we're gonna have a lot of fun I almost promise I don't promise nothing but I do promise that uh you'll be hearing my voice more than ever so uh hugs and hugs and hearts take care of yourself goodbye

Producer: this has been a nonproductive media presentation executive producer Frank Hablawi this program and many others like it on the nonproductive network is distributed under a creative commons attribution non-commercial no derivatives license please share it but ask before trying to change it or sell it for more information visit non-productive.com

Doodle Poodle: you you you you you you you you you

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July 10, 2020