[Old Story #1]

My Meeting With Barry

There was this one day – when I was walking home from working in the yard of all yards. I made a stop at the pill and convenience store on the corner of road and drive – where I picked up a lunch/breakfast/snack of a 20 oz. Mountain Dew and a “Big Grab” of “Spicier Nacho Doritos” – and hold onto your booties kids – because we are just getting started here.

After leaving the store (with my goods in tow) I was approached in most frightful ways by some of the neighborhood dogs – one was a big ol’ and mean ol’ rottweiler (who was without gate). They would do that run up to the edge of their property (like they even pay any sort of rent) all full of bluster and barking and making a show. I would just not even look at them – wouldn’t even give them the pleasure (plus somewhere in my head – a voice told me that as long as I didn’t look in their direction or speed up or eat a chip – then all would be okay).

I was dirt and tired gloom – but as I passed the outer skirts of dog-land – trudge trudge trudge – I knew that there was the possibility of one more test in front of me. So I started to expect another dog (a chow) on the corner. And – I should point out that it has been my experience that sometimes . . . chows like to eat people. If you just look in their odd teddy bear fluff dog eyes. . . you will see what I talking about.

Anyway no dog – so safe – safe home – home.

As I went over the crest of the flat road, I noticed that there was a guy on the other side of the street – about a hundred yards or so away. After a quick mental note was made that there was about to be another human in my vicinity – not another thought came into my head – but more chips did – yum! Then it happened – right when we were across the street from each other:

[B=Barry and M=Me]

B: HEY . . .
M: huh?!
B: Said hey
M: Uhrm – oh – hey
B: What you drinkin’
M: Huh?!
B: What you drinkin’ there?
M: Oh – drinking – uhm . . . just some mountain dew.

**pause**

B: Let me get a sip of that . . .
M: Noooooo
B: Whats that? I’m just like you – and I need something to drink . . .
M: Uhm . . . No I – uhm . . . can’t . . .

And we are still across the street from each other – keep that in mind . . .

B: Whats the matter . . . you sick or something?
M: No – well – ah . . . my – It’s just that my doctor told me that I can’t let people drink after me . . .
B: Whats the matter . . . you sick or something?
M: No – well – ah . . . my – It’s just that my doctor told me that I can’t let people drink after me . . .
B: (Even from across the street kind of looking nervous at this point – just a tiny bit – at least.) You got some disease or something??
M: (Acting kind of ashamed-ish and weird) Noooo – no . . . not any disease – – it’s just this problem – it’s uhrm . . .

**pause**

M: It’s this . . . upper-respiratory thing . . .

After a few ticks on the clock (seconds and stuff)

B: Well can I get fifty cent so that I can get something to drink?
M: Oh – yeah sure – I think that I have (end up pulling seventy-five cents out of my pocket!) – ooh yeah – I have seventy-five.

And then I stand there with the money in my hand – with him still standing across the street . . .

M:Well?! Here it is – come get it . . .

There was no – no – no way that I was going to cart his money all the way to his side of the street . . .

B: Oh – thanks (and then he comes over to my side of the street)
M: So what is your name anyway?!
B: Barry –
M: Well Barry – my name is Nat – and I live over that-a-way – down there a bit. Uhm . . . it was nice to meet you . . . (and then we exchange a kind of weak weak “pound” type of thing)

Then Barry started to walk down the street – (back back) from the way that I came . . .

B: (He turned back towards me – only a few feet away at this point) Hey man . . . you take care of yourself with that . . .
M: ahrm . . . thanks Barry – – thanks a lot. I will.

And then we parted ways. My favorite part of the whole exchange was that at a couple of points – – I managed to throw in some little **cough coughs** – – to I guess push forth the whole “upper-respiratory problem” that I was having . . .

That was the last time that I ever saw Barry. But I can’t help but think that if Id see him again – it might just spoil things (a bit). Fare thee well – friend Barry – and may your upper-respiratory system always find good health!