I was at the big store walking around the other day – and found myself mulling around the tissue aisle. Needless to say – I was pretty put out by how terrible the box designs were – but one thing did manage to tweak my interest in a moderately positive way. It was a box – sligtly unlike the other boxes . . . it was almost like there was a slight glow – the glow of health and supremacy – coming from the box. I had to stop and investigate.
It was a box of Puffs plus . . . with Vicks. “They have gone too far!” I yelled in my head. “How many more things can they possibly add to a tissue?” I needled at myself. I then – while holding a box – looked at a lady – arched my eyebrow and said with measured incredulity “This is simply too much!” as I tossed the box back onto the shelf and went on my merry way. I am pretty sure that she agreed with me.
The only problem was that the gears, cogs and wheels in my head started spinning – as they often do with new products – and then I came to the conclusion that I needed to try them. So – on my way to the pencil factory – where we make the best pencils in the business – I picked up a box. My world has changed – yet again – this time for the better.
I love them so much. I just wave them around in the air – smelling the Vicks smell feeling my breathing get a tiny bit less constricted and getting slightly nauseous. Then – when it is actually time to use them – it is confusing bliss. The need to blow my nose gets all twisted up with the desire to breath in deep the aroma of health – and things get goopy. I am still working on the goopy part. I will overcome.
Next up will be tissues that have all of this stuff – but that are also connected to social networking sites – and that alert your doctor as to if you are sick and how sick you are – and that will call you a car service to go to the airport to get to the drier climates out west – where there are good prospects for hard working folk – and stuff like that. The future is coming – and ain’t she a beaut?!
So – big news from the news desk – here in Coffee-Can Alley – maybe big news – that is – or maybe a hoax!
The other night I was driving home and it was dark – like how it gets at night – and right in front of us (really really far in front) – there was a light – like a super-slow-motion shooting star. Only much much bigger. I got all hoppity and started dancing about seeing a spaceship – while pushing the other scary thought back into my head (missle). My passenger then started to say the term “Space junk” over and over.
The car became a back and forth between “I think we just saw a spaceship” and her saying “Nothing but space junk.” Back and forth and back and forth.
Then I found this website where someone else had seen it
Here is his little story:
Full Description of event/sighting: My fiancée and I were driving home from dinner when we were stopped at a light. She asked me what time it is and I noted that it was exactly 8:00pm. Then I looked up to the sky (as I do much of the time when I’m a passenger) and spotted it. We both saw what appeared to be a “shooting star” except that it was traveling much slower. It’s speed still far exceeded that of any jet, airplane, or man made object, but was present for 4 – 5 seconds. The strange thing was that this star-like object had light being emitted from around it’s sides and there was a darker shape in the center so it looked quite man-made. The object’s path was parabolic heading downwards and towards the east. For a minute, I honestly thought it was a missile heading towards New York City, however, a missile does not fly in a parabolic manner. Judging by the other sightings I’ve read about, UFOs seem to travel in erratic straight lines that drastically change directions. This object did not travel in such a way. The object traveled in a single direction that seemed to head down and east simultaneously.
Pretty nifty! So I guess that I can cross that off of my old bucket list – eh?! Saw a spaceship flying around the nighttime sky . . . And even if it was just some boring old space junk (I mean what is “space junk” anyway?!) – that certainly isn’t as much fun to think of as seeing a ship – so I’ll just stick with my story.