Tag: identity

  • Bumperpodcast #459 – Season 3 – Zeitgeist

    Bumperpodcast #459 – Season 3 – Zeitgeist

    In this episode of the Bumperpodcast, Aloysius explains a phenomenal new idea for the podcast – you can’t wait to hear it!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

    About This Episode

    In this hilarious episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar, Aloysious J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, Doodle Poodle, and Producer spontaneously break into an improvised song that quickly devolves into comedic chaos. The crew discusses trying group therapy to reduce their on-air fighting, but the conversation takes an unexpected turn when Rufus reveals he's gotten caught up in a suspicious mobile game. After accidentally giving away his credit card information to a game about planetary princesses, Rufus has moved on to a communication-based social experiment game where he plays as "Kool Cat" (spelled K-U-L-K-A-T). The episode hilariously escalates as Rufus explains the game's bizarre mechanics—starting with just blinking and sighing, then graduating to simple emotional lines—and concludes with the shocking revelation that he believes he's fallen in love within this strange digital world.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I think it's okay to have fun and for it not to be perfect. And if it's a little silly, or if you make mistakes, because that's kind of how you learn, is by doing.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “I gave up my sandwich for this? I could have stayed over in the kitchen, is what I'm saying.”

    — Rufus T. Rufus

    “The big news here, everybody is in this game, this communication games. Well, I think that I have fallen in love.”

    — Rufus T. Rufus

    Topics: #improvisedmusic #friendship #onlinegames #scams #therapy #communication #socialmedia #identity

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Aloysious J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, Doodle Poodle, Producer, Robot

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: oh no oh is it happening i'm not sure hey aloysius yeah get on over here what is this

    Aloysious J. Pig: it sounds like a song yeah i'm rolling rolling rolling everybody knows i'm rolling rolling i'm a ball i'm a ball i'm up on the hill and i'm rolling go hey paul are you a chicken i think

    Natty Bumpercar: that you're a chicken everybody knows that i love little chicken hey everybody slow everybody just

    Rufus T. Rufus: think this song could be great if you don't say stupid stuff um no you're in my head and i don't

    Doodle Poodle: know what to say i love the music and i love the beat but i don't know what to say i agree this was

    Natty Bumpercar: fun but then all of a sudden there's rules and stuff and i don't know what i'm supposed to do and i don't know what i'm supposed to say is this dumb i feel like this is dumb am i being dumb right now yeah

    Rufus T. Rufus: okay if you gotta ask then you're probably being dumb if you gotta ask this you know the song is done how about that producer shut it down now wow you know that was that was fun we haven't done a little song like that in a long time so i understand we're a little bit out of practice but honestly uh producer that the the the the the the beats the jams the rhythm it was all so much fun i was i was astounded by it great job yeah no i heard uh i was i was a little bit out of my mind I was over in the kitchen, right? I was going to make myself a little sound. And I heard a calamity over here, the ruckus, if you will, the music. And I said to myself, I'm going to hold off on this sandwich and go see what everybody's up to over in the studio. And I came over, and y'all looked so happy, smiling, and your head's bopping to the beat. And then I stopped listening to the words, what you're saying, and I said, I gave up my sandwich for this? This is what I can't, I could have stayed over in the kitchen, is what I'm saying. Yeah, well, again, I was having fun.

    Natty Bumpercar: I think it's okay to have fun and for it not to be perfect. And if it's a little silly, or if you make mistakes, because that's kind of how you learn, is by doing. And we haven't done a song in so long.

    Rufus T. Rufus: And then right when we came in, I heard the music, and I was like, this, let's, you know, I didn't expect it, and I didn't know it was going to happen, but was I excited? Yes, very. And was I ready? Not so much. I don't even have my rhyme book. You guys, if I'm to be honest, I don't even, I didn't bring it in today. You know, I brought these receipts. I brought, this seems to be a candy wrapper. This is a napkin. I just, I have garbage. I have garbage in my pocket here, but I don't have my rhymes. So, you know, I just kind of went with it, and I don't know. Now, Natty? This is, I hear you. This is all valid. I appreciate you.

    Producer: Um. Yeah, it's really, you guys are doing great with the therapy, right? We're doing group therapy, and so sometimes we all get together, and we talk, you know? And so we were trying to figure out how to not fight on the podcast as much, and we, so we, so now what we're going to do is we're going to bring in another person, a third party, and talk to them about it so that we could kind of, you know, stop, again, fighting on the podcast.

    Rufus T. Rufus: Wait, you guys actually did that? I thought that was a joke. I thought, I saw, I saw, I saw, I saw the message come across, you know, but what happens with me is, on my devices, you know, I'll be there playing the games with the, you know, it's like a, I don't know, some sort of word game, but there's like little animals, and there's like, you have to do, it's a fun game. They say it tests your mind. It brings elasticity to your brain, and so I was sitting there playing, and bloop, there goes a message, right? And it said, uh, uh, uh, schedule group, uh, group therapy bumper podcast. And I, and I said, oh, well, now this is interesting. And I went to click on it, and it had already disappeared. And what happens, I clicked an, an, an advertisement, and, uh, I guess the game, uh, is, you've got these little ads, so you don't got to pay for it necessarily. And, and then all of a sudden, I'm in this space game, and it's like, you got to save the, the princess, the planet, the princess of planets or something, planets of princesses. And I said, oh, my word, you know, and I got into it, because I, I, you know, you throw me into a situation like that, and I'm going to step up, because that's what I do. And, and I, you know, I said, all right, let's go. And then, uh, honestly, uh, it was an ad that you couldn't even, I felt like I was playing, but I, nothing, I wasn't controlling nothing. But what I did was I went in, I played the game, I gave them my credit card information, and, uh, they, they took it very willingly, I'll say. And, uh, now the game has turned into, uh, me, uh, working with my bank and trying to, to, well, they took, they took everything, the, the, the, the princess planets. They took all my, all my money. And, uh. Rufus? What were we talking about? Okay, Rufus, okay. We're going to, we're going to put a pin in that, because we're going to, we have, obviously got to come back to, um, hmm, you giving out your credit card information and now losing all of the, your money. Um, oh, pig, I thought we were supposed to, like, cut him off from the, um, the outside stuff. I thought it was just, you know, the games are fine, but as long as they just are on the phone and they're not, you know, whatever, going around into the world, you're not, you're not, like, talking to anybody on these games, are you? Well, I mean, it's not so much as a, as a, as a talk. Uh, I'm happy to say I didn't cross that line. But what it is, is they make you a, a, a, an avatar. You know, I, you see you sit there and you can design it. And I put, uh, look at me. I'm like a, a, a kitten is what my, I made it. It's orange, got some stripes, you know. I put some fun of glasses on them, fun of hat. And, uh, I named them. Now, hold on. It's Kool Cat, but with all, with all, it's K-U-L-K-A-T. Yeah, Kool, Kool. It looks like it says Kull Cat, but, uh, the regular Kool Cat was taken, and Kool Cat, uh, all the way up to 49 was taken. Kool Cat 1, Kool Cat 2, all the way. And so I said, all right, let's, let's mix this up a little bit. And so what I did was, uh, K-O-O-L Cat, uh, and that was also taken way up into the numbers. And I said, all right, let's kind of mix this up a little bit. And then I figured out, uh, U can sound, if you do it right, if you look at it, you know, kind of to the side, that U, it's going to sound like the, the, uh, ooh, right? So Kool, Kool Cat was my name. Okay, stop, stop. So I think we've, we've, again, we've lost the thread here a little bit. So are you speaking to, are the people, are you talking to people online? Is, is this something where you're communicating with your, uh, Kool Cat? Well, no, so I didn't, I did not, uh, pay for this, this part of it. So I, I did not speak necessarily because you gotta, you know, I gotta, I think you gotta be a level 1700 or whatever it is to unlock the microphone, you know? And that's when I think the communication really starts. But what they allow you to do early on in the game so that you can build a communication, is you take your avatar, again, I'm Kool Cat, and you can type in and you can say like, well, okay, you actually can't even type in at the, at the state, I'm looking forward. Now, what I can do is I can just choose little, little word like bubbles, you understand? And so I can click it and it goes like, yee-haw, right? Yee-haw, like that. And, uh, and you can do one and it just goes, wah-wah. Like a sad thing, right? So right now I'm at, I'm at kind of the base of communication. Yeah. But that's why I know that this is real. Well, so I don't, okay. There's a lot to unpack here. Um, so you are communicating, but it's just through, uh, basic phrases. How many, how many phrases do you have unlocked? Do you unlock more phrases as you go? Yeah, yeah. The higher the levels, or the more you pay, the, the, the more you can communicate. Yeah. This is actually, this whole thing, this game, they built it. It's around, uh, communicating with people all around the world. I have, I have friends. I have a friend in, uh, Bengalidoo. I have a friend in, uh, uh, Washon, I think it is. Uh, uh, there's places just all around. I don't even know if these places are real, but that's just what it says under the name, you understand? So I don't even know if I'm talking to actual people or not. Uh, just, just a quick search. I looked up, uh, Bengalidoo, not a place. There is a place called Washon, but that's as, it's as like a series of restaurants. There's like Washon 1, Washon 17, the real Washon, the original Washon. So I, that, I don't know if it's an actual place, but it is, it is, uh, there are things that come up if I search for that. Uh, so, um, back, is this the person that took your, your, your credit card information and your money and everything? Oh, good job, Pig. Let's, yeah, good. Get him back on track. Uh, so Rufus, um, is, is, is this the game that you put your information in or, or is this a different game? Well, again, this, this one here is not really a game so much as a, as a social experiment is what they say. They say we're going to take communication back to its root, right? You know, cause when you first start, you don't even have these phrases. You just, it's like, uh, there's, there's some lines, right? There's like one that's like bent down and that looks like a sad face. Just, just, just a bent down line. And so you can walk up to people and depending on your day, how you're feeling, you just click that little line. Sometimes it's a happy effect, you know, just a smile looks like, and then sometimes it's, you know, and that's where you start off. Right. And I forgot before that you actually, you get, uh, you just go up to people and blink. That's, that's the, the, the first one is you, you can go up to people. And you can blink or you can sigh. And that's the first step, I believe. I, I don't hate the concept. If I'm to be honest, I kind of like, you know, cause I think communication in society is a little bit broken right now. So maybe this is what we need to do. We need to take it all the way back to where you just, you can, you can walk by people and you can blink and you can throw up a little line. Maybe it's an, you know, maybe a straight up and down is like an exclamation point. Like, whoa, you know, like that. Or maybe, uh, yeah, you got your sad, you got your happy. Cause like, right. I think maybe there's just too much going on and people don't know how to express it. And so we need to take them back to, uh, you know, almost like babies. Just be like, I go, go, you know, whatever you say like that. And, oh, you know, just like take it and have people figure that stuff out before they keep talking to each other. Right. Yeah. I, I mean, I, I, I, from that perspective, I kind of like it, but we have to get back to the credit cards and the money and, and, and everything. The else that's going on. So, um, Rufus, if you could, I guess, just give your phone to producer. Cause he's kind of our technical genius and, and we'll, we'll, we'll sort this out. We'll, we'll call the bank. We'll get that all fixed up. And, oh, what? Well, um, I didn't mean to interrupt you. Uh, and I think it's a good plan to get the phone to produce it. Cause I've actually locked myself out. And the, the big news here, everybody is in this game, this communication games. Well, I think that I have fallen in love.

    Robot: The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty bumper car and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean, and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show. And you'd like to help support the podcast. Check out our Patreon page at HTTPS colon forward slash forward slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty bumper car. Also pretty, please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere, post about it on all of the social medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is produced at headquarters in coffee can alley. It's recorded mixed and produced by producers. The bumper podcast features contributions from Aloysius, J pig, Rufus, T Rufus, doodle poodle, robot trunks, and a gag, all of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty bumper car. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty bumper car.com slash subscribe. Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Natty bumper car. Hugs and hearts. See you soon. See you soon.

  • Bumperpodcast #407 – Season 2 – Mystery

    Bumperpodcast #407 – Season 2 – Mystery


    Natty is thrilled to be in the studio — and is even more thrilled when a couple of his old pals show up!

    The Bumperpodcast with Natty Bumpercar is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!! Also, also, we have a Patreon page now!!! https://www.patreon.com/nattybumpercar.

    And – and – and — Natty Bumpercar is now an Ambassador for the Improv channel on Vurbl!! Here is a link to that page: https://vurbl.com/browse/comedy/improv/ go hang out — it’ll be fun!!

    Another story about saving baby animals!

    A feel good story!

    Previous episode!

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe


    [av_toggle_container faq_markup=” initial=’0′ mode=’accordion’ sort=” styling=” colors=” font_color=” background_color=” border_color=” toggle_icon_color=” colors_current=” font_color_current=” toggle_icon_color_current=” background_current=” background_color_current=” background_gradient_current_direction=’vertical’ background_gradient_current_color1=” background_gradient_current_color2=” background_gradient_current_color3=” hover_colors=” hover_font_color=” hover_background_color=” hover_toggle_icon_color=” alb_description=” id=” custom_class=” template_class=” av_uid=’av-9q1l2j’ sc_version=’1.0′ admin_preview_bg=”]
    [av_toggle title=’Show Transcript:’ tags=” custom_id=” av_uid=’av-6vzgjv’ sc_version=’1.0′]
    Natty Bumpercar 0:03
    Well, well. Well, well, well, if it isn’t the bumper broadcast. There’s sirens outside. They’re coming to get me. For what? For not recording a podcast the last couple of weeks I’ve been busy. The holiday season, it’s holiday season it cetera, et cetera.

    Rufus T. Rufus 0:28
    Is that just gonna? Are you just gonna? You seem like you’re in good spirits, Natalie, but well, you know, what is holiday season? Sorry. It’s already Yeah, I

    Natty Bumpercar 0:41
    understand. No, Rufus. It’s I’m just happy to be here. And I’m thrilled. And I’m in the bumper barn. And you know what, we’ve made a lot of progress. I would say that we are about six 70% Done with the insulation, which means I can be in here. Well, it’s really I can be in here because it’s like 62 degrees, which in December is weird and scary. And but we’re just gonna roll with it and try to make lemons out of lemonade. Well, that’s not something we can do. Is that so? Is it. A big Do we have a recipe to turn lemons into lemonade? Lemonade? Lemonade in the lemon?

    Producer 1:24
    No, I don’t I don’t we she’s not here yet for these shots, right? But I don’t know if you need recipe bursting here in the lab where we make the bumper pad case. Okay, here and get quieter. Yep, sorry. I’m not really entirely sure if we have those.

    Natty Bumpercar 1:40
    You know what, you’re probably right. I usually they’re probably in the kitchen or maybe in the library, but it makes sense that they are not here in the studio because we don’t cook here. So why would we need

    Peanut Lou 1:52
    to hire me Pina loo? I haven’t been on the podcast. Yo. Yeah, I forgot what I’m supposed to do here. Anybody please tell me what I’m supposed to do on the

    Natty Bumpercar 2:05
    piano below. knows what’s going on kitty cat man

    Spot Elliot 2:16
    is going on. It’s me.

    Natty Bumpercar 2:22
    Yeah, what’s going on? For anyone who doesn’t know because they have not been on the show in a long time. Spot Elliot and peanut Lou. Were cats that I rescued a long time ago and they’re best friends. And they’re so sweet. And I love them to pieces.

    Peanut Lou 2:39
    So so so so so buttons we I keep wanting to find who I see you.

    Rufus T. Rufus 2:49
    You know it? I love talking to new people who has it? Who is it? I’m so excited. Why are you why are you so you’re very amped on this episode. Now there were two almost three minutes in it if your energy is F is too much if I’m to be honest, let’s Can we just tamp it down a little bit fine.

    Producer 3:06
    I was going to say something but you know cuz I’m producing the whole show. So my name is on the credit in so yeah, this it really impacts me if you are acting the little looky loo and you’re going out and people are like our producers on that chair. I don’t know if I want to hire him. And I’m like, oh, please hire me because just don’t ignore the horse. If you could just focus on the engineering but the producing

    Unknown Speaker 3:32
    anyway, so he special guest Okay, hold on. Here we go.

    Santa 3:37
    Well, Lou, it’s wonderful to see. I’m so happy to be here on this. DREW. Is everyone been nice to show I’ve been a bit naughty.

    Rufus T. Rufus 3:51
    I’d like to know you’re saying I don’t like you. And it’s nice to be here. Obviously everyone loves it when Santa Claus comes into town. However, you can’t just come in and immediately start asking people if they have been naughty or they have been nice it’s it’s they have the rights you understand as citizens of the United States of America. And so for you to start implying and infer and that maybe they haven’t been on the ice is a little bit too much

    Santa 4:21
    Now Rufus ervice it’s wonderful for you to be here. First and foremost, I have a couple of issues or a couple of bones to pick with you if you if you don’t mind. I have been keeping my eye on everyone but you in particular have have certainly caught my eye over the course of a year. What

    Natty Bumpercar 4:44
    did you do? What did you do? What did you do? Why are you sad? Oh, you’re in trouble. Oh,

    Rufus T. Rufus 4:53
    no, I will not have the spotlight of injustice turned upon me. As the light is so bright that when you shine it upon me, you will see that I have done nothing incorrect. Nothing, introspect, nothing that you would ever reject. I say to you that I’ve been wonderful this year, everybody knows that you can look at my Yelp reviews, up to a 3.5 star rating. That’s three and a half out of five. So I feel like this year I’ve really turned things around.

    Santa 5:31
    Of course, you’ve turned things around reviews, but it’s not all about the star ratings and star reviews you understand. It’s about did you help anyone? Were you kind to anyone? Did you give of yourself? Did you did you go out of your way to try to make someone feel better? Did you notice that someone was down and think to yourself, I couldn’t pick them up? I can help them out. Right? Did you do any of these?

    Producer 6:02
    I didn’t know that this one time that I was in the hallway. And I was working on some wiring systems and Rufus was trying to get through and he did he picked me Oh, okay, so he picked you up. So that’s what you’re talking about? Yes. But then he just moved me to design I don’t know if he’s the type of peeking you’re talking about you actually physically oh boy picked up and kind of he was really tossed to me didn’t really display down he could have just very busy lifted me and then we’re talking about

    Santa 6:40
    No No, obviously this is not the type of pick me up that we’re talking about when talking about emotionally picking people up when they’re down in despair when they’re in the dumps when they’re sad. This however, this feels like borderline assault if I’m to be completely honest, Rufus. For the moment I feel like you’re not on the nice list. You’re not on any list at all. You’re kind of in between lists if you will. I know most people don’t even realize that but I do have those the naughty list and there’s a nice list but there’s also kind of this in between list that will that we’re gonna sit you upon right now you’re on. You’re on the fence as it were.

    Unknown Speaker 7:24
    So I’m noticing something kind of strange. Yeah, I’m dying Santa Claus. Santa Wilbur like Well, first

    Natty Bumpercar 7:31
    off, I noticed that too. Peanut Lou and I it’s kind of strange. Because every time Santa comes in the room, Rufus leaves the room and every time Rufus is in the rooms, waiting, every time Sam is in the room, Rufus leaves the room and every time Rufus is in the room, Santa leaves. Yeah, you guys aren’t ever in the room at the same time right now. No roof is it’s just you what’s going

    Rufus T. Rufus 7:55
    on? You’re being a bit conspiratorial, and there’s nothing to see. I think you know, Sam is obviously a very busy man. I’m a very busy man myself. We’re in the time of year right now. People need lawyers more than they need. I don’t know fishing the sea or whatever that the phrase is. People need lawyers more than they need a honey bee now that just rhymed. It didn’t make any more sense. I did it people need lawyers more than wool socks. I use the phrase good No, you’re usually better off usually I am. But yeah, no, I’m not.

    Natty Bumpercar 8:34
    Are you a little You seem like you’re a little bit flustered. Maybe a little bit freaked out is that is what’s going on.

    Santa 8:41
    Now. Rufus has had to leave the room as he had a lot of things. He had other engagements to take care of. But now I sent him here to talk to everybody. Now, Rufus, I feel like again, you’re on the fence, but I know that you can probably pull it all together. I believe in you and you should also believe in yourself.

    Aloysius J. Pig 9:03
    Hi, everybody. It’s me Aloysius. JPEGs really weird energy in the room right now. I Santa’s I guess is here. Wow. Spawn le and Vina Lu What’s up kids? You guy What are you doing? Are you bad seniors so long. We’re

    Spot Elliot 9:21
    just hanging out here. So I used to do I do talk he does sing now what’s right and you give me honest, your voice seems to be a lot deeper.

    Peanut Lou 9:32
    Yes. He’s got some sort of a Trojan going on how it’s happening. Really? Yeah, he’s your wife. Oh, I do a lot deeper. Yeah, you’re right.

    Aloysius J. Pig 9:42
    But you sound just like you normally did so I but it’s anyway, it’s splendid to see you guys with an agenda room. Has anybody seen real fast?

    Natty Bumpercar 9:50

    No, but it’s weird because every time Rufus talks san is not here, and every time Santa talks, Rufus isn’t here. I think there’s something strange going on with your hours

    Producer 9:59
    so far. Just To say that it totes banoo because you say that this whole situation is taught.

    Natty Bumpercar 10:04
    Not only what I say it’s totes banoo, but I would say it’s a total mystery

    Outro 10:20
    the bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show, and you’d like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at https colon forward slash forward slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty Bumpercar also pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere, post about it on all of the social medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is produced at headquarters in coffee can alley it’s recorded mixed and produced by producer. The bumper podcast features contributions from Aloysius J pig Rufus T Rufus doodle poodle, robot trunks and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty Bumpercar. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty bumpercar.com/subscribe Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Natty Bumpercar Hugs in hearts See you soon.

    NonPro 11:39
    This has been a non productive media presentation, executive producer Frank Blaue. This program and many others like it on the non productive network is distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution non commercial no derivatives license, please share it but ask before trying to change it or sell it. For more information visit non dash productive.com
    [/av_toggle]

    [/av_toggle_container]

  • Bumperpodcast #353 – Monster

    Bumperpodcast #353 – Monster

    Emerson is on the Bumperpodcast today, and there is also a monster. They have a regular hoot!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com, or to call in and leave a message – 646.847.7976. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this chaotic episode of Bumperpodcast, Aloysious J. Pig attempts to host a show called "Monster Interview Monster" but gets confused when his guest, a young human named Emerson, insists he's not a monster. The interview quickly derails as they debate who is and isn't a monster, with Aloysious struggling to understand the difference. Natty Bumpercar, Doodle Poodle, and Rufus T. Rufus each drop by to interact with Emerson, who has been mysteriously left alone in the studio. Meanwhile, a mysterious blue monster with peach horns and a fish tail keeps appearing and disappearing. The episode features the reveal of the studio dog's name (Popcorn) and ends with Rufus T. Rufus attempting to recruit Emerson in a scheme to take over the podcast.

    Memorable Quotes

    “you don't have fur like a monster you don't have a tail like a monster you don't have horns let me see your teeth no you don't have sharp pointy teeth like a monster are you sure you're a human”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    “I'm saying, son, piles of money. This whole podcast could become your podcast. All of this, one day, can and will be yours.”

    — Rufus T. Rufus

    “I went to the pig hospital 22 times, which was rough because my insurance only covered the first 20 visits.”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    Topics: #monsters #interviews #confusion #identity #childhood #imagination #studiochaos #legalschemes

    Featuring: Aloysious J. Pig, Natty Bumpercar, Doodle Poodle

    Full Transcript

    Aloysious J. Pig: um hello my name is monster and today i'm going to interview a monster so hi what is your name little monster i'm not a monster my name's emerson but i'm a monster and i supposed to do an interview show called monster interview monster are you a monster no what are you exactly a human a human let's see you no you don't have fur like a monster you don't have a tail like a monster you don't have horns let me see your teeth no you don't have sharp pointy teeth like a are you sure you're on are you so you're you're not a monster i'm not a monster am i a monster

    Unknown: yes why am i a monster because you have horns a tail oh yeah well i've got a ton of fur it

    Aloysious J. Pig: writes from my my my father monster side of the family so i thought of her okay are you um are you blue no you're not blue are you red no huh you're just kind of like kid you look like a kid basically to me i'm white okay well you're kind of peachy you're not really i mean white is you know the color i'd say you're more like silver have you ever seen yourself in the sun i'd say you're more bronze oh i don't go out i don't tan i don't

    Unknown: tan well other people will tan i don't i don't tan okay i do go to the pool have you ever been to the

    Aloysious J. Pig: pool yes you know they kick me out of the pool you know why because you're a monster good because i'm

    Unknown: a monster yes it's also because i'm so furry and then you're gonna spread infections in your fur

    Aloysious J. Pig: i'm not sick or nothing i'm just a monster okay what about your drools i thought it's true a little bit i don't you you drool no Nine. I heard you say that. I'm sorry. I got very confused. So wait, what does a nine-year-old do with their time to play and stuff? Their imagination. Is it their imagination? Yeah. So, okay, can we pretend imagination now? No. You don't want to play, right? So I was going to say this. I'm imagining that I'm a boat and I'm sailing to a place called Volcano and there's a carrot and I need someone to help me. Will you help me? What? So there's a poodle and he's eating a bagel and… Okay. Okay. And then we have to arrest the princess. Where's Natty Bumpercar? I don't know. He just… I'm on the schedule today for the monster… I'm going to kick you out. Please don't kick Kick me out. Kick. Ow! Okay. Nice talking to you. Okay. Hey Em, what are you doing here?

    Natty Bumpercar: Nothing. Are you doing a podcast? Yeah. Were you talking to yourself or? I was talking to this monster. What monster? Did you get his name? No. That happens too often. People come in here and they just start doing podcasts and they don't even sign up properly. How am I supposed to… I can't even charge him if I don't know who it is.

    Unknown: So if we can't charge him, we can't make money. Okay. I think his name was… I don't know. You don't know? Okay. Do you know what he looked like? He was blue. Okay. He had horns. Okay. Like peach horns. Peach horns? Yeah. Okay. And he had a tail that looked like a fish. A fish tail? Yeah. Ew. Okay. His eyes were bigger than… Like saucers? Yeah. Like you

    Natty Bumpercar: saw a saucer? Like a plate? Like a little plate? Yeah. Okay. I think I'm getting a pretty good description. So he was blue. He had horns that were peach colored. He had a tail that looked like a fish. And eyes as big as saucers. Okay. I'm going to track this monster down. And… He's outside. He's outside. Did he just go out? What did he do? He left you in the middle of an interview? Yeah. Did he just walk out by himself? Yeah. Weird. I would never do that. I would never just… Oh wait. Hold on. What's… Oh, I got to go take care of something. Can you keep talking for a few minutes? Yeah.

    Aloysious J. Pig: Hey, bud. What's going on? Good. What is… I was looking for Natty. He's supposed to give me a paycheck today. I think he's with Popcorn. It's Paycheck Friday. He's with Popcorn? Yeah. The dog. Oh, we gave away the dog's name. That's right. Last week we were telling everybody that we got a dog. And now we said to find out the name, go watch this video, which we didn't link to the video. So no one's going to find it. But we're going to find it. We're going to find it. We're going to find it. We're going to find it. We're going to find it. But, so Popcorn… We have a dog named Popcorn here at Headquarters. Oh, also, hey everyone, it's me, Aloysius J. Pig. What? That's my name. You didn't know that? No, I didn't know that. Have we ever met before? No. I'm pretty sure we've met before. You're

    Unknown: the one that always used to beat me up, right? That was five years ago. Yeah, bro. I remember,

    Aloysious J. Pig: okay. I still remember these things. You do? Yes. You beat me up several times. Like every time you saw me, it ended up in a brawl and you're punching me and you're scratching and fighting. You're a little bruiser. I know.

    Unknown: And then you had to go to the hospital 20 times.

    Aloysious J. Pig: I went to the pig hospital.

    Unknown: 22 times.

    Aloysious J. Pig: 22 times, which was rough because my insurance only covered the first 20 visits.

    Unknown: And then the other time when we have another kid.

    Aloysious J. Pig: Who's the other kid? Oliver. Never met

    Unknown: him. Yes, you have.

    Aloysious J. Pig: What does he look like? Oh, wait. I did meet Oliver. He's the one with a blue fur. He's got peach horns. He's got a fish tail. That's not him? Who's that then?

    Unknown: He's my brother.

    Aloysious J. Pig: The monster is your brother?

    Unknown: No, Oliver is my brother. That's not his name. The monster's name is Oliver.

    Aloysious J. Pig: Wait a minute. So, hold on a second. How many people are we talking about here? We're talking about one brother named

    Unknown: Oliver. Oliver.

    Aloysious J. Pig: And we're talking about some monster. Whose name we don't know?

    Unknown: Yeah, we don't know his name.

    Aloysious J. Pig: Okay. This is very strange. Weird things happen around here, I feel. Yep. Oh, speaking of weird things, I just realized I have an appointment, so I gotta go. Okay? Can you keep talking? Yes. Alright. I'll see you later, kid. Good to see you. Please, thanks for not beating me up. I appreciate it. Ow! It's a hit.

    Doodle Poodle: Ah! Beautiful! It's a little fire here. Uh, hello? Who's this? Emerson. Toodle poodle. I heard that we got another dog in the house. You're a dog. I'm Noah. I'm a dog. That's why I was Where's the banana? I haven't drawn a banana in a long time. It's been like 20 years. It's been like 20 years since I drew a banana. It's been like 20 years since I drew. Oh. So what year was that? I don't remember.

    Unknown: Huh?

    Doodle Poodle: But like… Yeah. 1320 and I thought human was gricked just like, I just wish I would 've been one. What is it? What is it? I want a banana dog. Is that something in your memory? I thought I saw something in your memory. But it's a very famous cartoon. um. All. All. Yeah. Catch them all? Gotta, it makes more sense when you say that. Okay. Okay. Hey, it was good to see you, buddy. You too. I wanna go now? Okay. Okay. Where are you gonna go? That's a great question. I'm gonna go make some drawings. Okay. I like to doodle. Oh, no. What can I draw? What should I draw? A turtle. I'm gonna go draw a turtle. I'm gonna go draw a turtle. I'm gonna go draw a turtle. I'm gonna go draw turtle. It's gonna be a very slow drawing. Okay. Okay. Bye-bye.

    Aloysious J. Pig: Uh, now, excuse me, son. This is Rufus G. Rufus. Uh, now, what exactly are you doing in here by yourself? That is against the law. Or is it? Because everybody left me. There was a monster. My dad. Dude. Um. Aloysius was here. He owes me money. And who else? The little dog man. Uh-huh. Now, listen, uh, you, I just want you to know, when I say it is against the law, it is not against the law for you, but they are liable for leaving you in here by yourself, a minor, a youngster. So, what I am saying is, if you need representation, if you need a lawyer to sue them, this… I'm not gonna sue them. I'm saying, son, piles of money. This whole podcast could become your podcast. All of this, one day, you're one day, can and will be yours. Okay. You're gonna take it? Yes. Let's pink it, promise, pink it, swear. Okay. Rufus T. Rufus and Emerson are finally gonna take this thing down. We're gonna take it over. I will go work on the paperwork, okay? Okay. All right. Hey, kid,

    Unknown: I came back. The monster. Oh, my God. Why'd you come back and left me and then… I'm gonna kick you out again.

    Aloysious J. Pig: No!

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

  • Bumperpodcast #281 – History

    Bumperpodcast #281 – History

    Bumpercar and Pig talk about how the past can define you, if you let it. They also wish everyone a Happy New Year – and bring some songs and cheer!

    Did you like porridge? Let us know by sending an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com.

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals! 

    About This Episode

    In episode 281 of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar starts the new year exhausted from the busy December holiday season. Aloysious J. Pig calls him out for complaining and shares his own philosophy about managing how others perceive you. The conversation takes an unexpected turn as Pig reveals his struggles with being labeled as messy at his favorite slop restaurant, leading to an insightful discussion about reputation, identity, and how past behaviors define us. The episode features a hilarious revelation about someone from their past named Porridge Pete who now runs the very slop restaurant Pig frequents. Natty and Pig decide to hit the mall together, with plans to revisit Natty's old "green pants" identity and grab some food at Pete's restaurant.

    Memorable Quotes

    “You're not stuck to that narrative. You control your own narrative, right? So what you do is you got to go back in, you got to flip the script.”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    “I wore green pants four times in my life, and you happen to be there for it, and so now I'm bumper green pants to you. Completely ignore the last 20 years of my life.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Porridge Pete actually held on to what he was doing when he was growing up, whereas you, bumper green pants, ain't never wear no green pants no more because you don't want to be known about the green pants.”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    Topics: #identity #friendship #reputation #newyear #restaurants #nostalgia #self-improvement #socialperception

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Aloysious J. Pig

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: oh bumper podcast i am so tired i tell you what i am limping into this new year this year i am spent i am done with i am over it's so december is such a busy month i know it's a fun month you got a lot going on you got a lot you're doing a lot of stuff for people you're helping out you're doing this you're doing that you're over here you're over there you're moving you're shaking you're going to parties you're shaking hands you're kissing babies you're doing whatever you got to do but man it is unstoppable unflappable unrelenting is what it is uh but we made it i think you know it's a few days i guess to go maybe a day or two

    Aloysious J. Pig: but i'm i'm happy to uh hey hey bubs what's going on big hey buddy what are you doing i'm just hanging out what are you just complaining again a little bit a little going on with you i ain't nothing what are you always so upset about you always so Oh, I'm so tired. Oh, blah, blah, blah. Oh, I'm so popular. I got to go all the parties. Oh, I got to go shake hands and kiss babies. Come on, bro. Just be happy that, you know, people want you to come hang out and want to see you and stuff. That's a good thing.

    Natty Bumpercar: It's a good thing to be like you, bumper car. It's a good thing to do all the things that you, you know. I don't know the words to the song. I just made it up. Yeah, you just made it up. Okay, that's fine. I agree with you, pig. I am happy. I'm so happy. I have a great life. I'm thrilled. But I do, I get sleepy, sleepy tired. And here's what happens. I get super excited about this, that, and this, and that, and those, and this, and this, and that. And then I spread myself too thin, and then I get wah, wah, wah. And that's, you know, that's a good problem to have, that I'm so busy that I'm getting worn out. So if it sounds like I'm complaining. Which I'm sure it did sound like I was complaining because I was kind of. You were definitely complaining a little bit. Yes. That's what you do. I was kind of complaining. That's fine. Then I'm sorry. No. I apologize. That's a thank you. I shouldn't be complaining. I'm living the dream. I'm living the life. The dream, buddy. And I'm happy as a clam. I hope you're good. I'm so good. You never tell me about yourself, guys. You don't ask. And girls, and people, and whatnot. How are you doing? For a second, I thought. You're not answering. Oh, I thought you were talking to me, but then I realized, oh, you're talking to the bumper cop, papa. Buccateers. Yeah, that thing. Yeah. But it's fun. You can ask me how I'm doing, too. Pig, how are you? Oh, thank you. Yeah, of course.

    Aloysious J. Pig: I actually am doing, you know.

    Natty Bumpercar: You just kind of trailed off like you don't know what I'm doing. No, it's because I get self-conscious. Here's my thing. You like to complain a lot. That's like your thing. What I like to do is I like to keep things close to the vest. I like to keep the cards to the table. I like to keep everything that's going on internally, internal, if you know what I'm saying. And why is that? Because I get nervous. You know, I don't want people to, I had this problem with my friends, right, where I used to complain a lot, and then they just, they would take me there. They'd be like, oh, here comes the pig. He's going to complain. And then they put me over on that shelf, and I never got out of it, which is kind of sad because I want my friends to be like, oh, no, here comes the pig. Watch out, guys. It sounds like a party's about to start. It sounds like a party's about to start up in here. It sounds like a party's about to start up in here. Party up in here. We're pig. Party up in here. Well, but I think once you muddy those waters, it gets, people are like, oh, that's a dude who complains a lot, you know? And even if it ain't your fault, even if you're going through stuff and you're like, oh, you guys are my friends. I'm going to talk to you about this stuff. Then sometimes, sometimes that's just what happens. You end up dumping a lot of negative stuff on your friends, and then they're like, oh, well, here comes Mr. Negative Pig, and then womp, womp, there you go. It's a weird thing. Friendships are weird. I'm not going to lie to you. Not even friendship, but relationships in the whole wide world. For instance, I got this one place I go to for slop, right? The best slop in the whole town, the whole city, the whole state, maybe the whole coast. And I was going there for a while, and then the people started to recognize me, and a couple of times. A couple of times. I was down and out. I made a mess on the table, and all of a sudden, they're not as nice to me, because they're like, oh, here comes that messy pig. And I'm like, bro, I'm a pig. That's what I do. You run a slop restaurant, guess what's going to happen? It's going to get a bit messy, you know? So it's totally cool, though, man, because what you do, you're not stuck to that narrative. You control your own narrative, right? So what you do is you got to go back in, you got to flip the script. You got to rewrite it a little bit. So now when I go into that restaurant, I go in with cleaner, and I actually clean my table like all serious business. Like, I got to make it sparkle, and I got to make it shine. So, you know, here's the thing. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. You do you. But you got to understand how you act and how the wow reacts to you. Yeah, okay. It's all intertwined. It's all connected. Pig. You understand? Yeah, I do. But that was really insightful and really deep. And I feel like even though you said you want to keep internal things internal, I feel like maybe you just opened up a little bit. Like, maybe you just told us a little bit about the inner workings of pig, which is pretty darn cool, if I do say so myself. And I totally agree with you, too. It's the type of thing where if you go back to your hometown on the holidays or whatever, and people, you know, you haven't been there in 10 years or whatever, but you're seeing people from high school or college or wherever, you know, from a long time ago, and they see you, and they're like, hey, what's up, bumper car green pants, because you wore green pants 20 years ago for four days or something like that, and then that's who you are to them. They're like, yeah, what's up, you remember, man, you used to wear green pants all the time. Oh, bro, your green pants. And you're like, cool. I wore green pants four times in my life, and you happen to be there for it, and so now I'm bumper green pants to you. No, that's great. Completely ignore the last 20 years of my life. That's fine. That makes a lot of sense. Let's just scoot it on back to where I wore green pants a couple of times. And it's weird, because that's the stuff that defines who you are, and it's kind of in your history and in your lineage, and it might have directed, like, maybe I don't wear green pants anymore because I wore it four times, and I got the nickname Natty Green Pants, so maybe, you know, that stuff is definitely important because it happened, but, you know, again, just kind of take that guy to the side and be like, that's hilarious. What's up, porridge Pete, or whatever, you know, because he ate porridge when he was in pre-K, and, you know, but then you're doing the same thing to him, so don't do that. Let's see. Let's think this through. Let's think this through. Let's, uh… What?

    Aloysious J. Pig: You went to school with Porridge Pete? Bro, he used to make the best porridge I ever had in my whole life.

    Natty Bumpercar: As a matter of fact, and this is a weird connection that you just did to what I just did, but Porridge Pete grew up to open a restaurant that sells slop. That's the restaurant that I was talking about just a minute ago. What? Mind blown. Totally blown. Porridge Pete married this girl named Sally. Right? And then Sally and Pete opened up a little bitty restaurant somewhere far away. It did so well that they franchised that out. Boom, bam, boom. Right? They got all this money, but that wasn't what his dream was. Porridge Pete opened up slop. It's called slop. And he makes all kinds of stuff, like porridge, like stew, like grits, like corn cob soup. Soup? Like, I'm talking, like, all this… All this stuff that's, you know, kind of sloppy meals, right? It's so weird. It's so crazy. So here's the thing. Porridge Pete actually held on to what he was doing when he was growing up, eating the porridge, making the porridge, whereas you, bumper green pants, ain't never wear no green pants no more because you don't want to be known about the green pants. It's weird. He let his history define him. You ran away from your history. You know what I'm thinking, bro? Yeah, that makes sense. Here's the thing. What's the thing? What's the thing? Here's the thing. What's the thing? Tell me what the thing is. Tell me what the thing is. Also, it's really weird and cool that you know Porridge Pete. Yeah, I know. We're going to go… That's cool, too. We're going to go to the mall. We're going to go to the green pants store. We're going to use your gift card that Santa Claus brought to you, and we're going to buy you… Are you ready for it? Are you ready for this? Are you ready for it? Are you ready for this? A whole stick of green pants. 2017 bumper green pants is making his re-arrival upon the scene. He's going to make it crystal clean. He's going to show everybody what he means. He's bumper green pants. He's bumper green pants. Everybody look. It's Natty Green Pants. Go. Natty Green Pants. Natty, Natty Green Pants. Go. Natty Green Pants. Here he comes, y'all. I like the song a lot. I don't like the idea so much. I've got plenty of pants. I do have a gift card, which is kind of cool. We can go to the mall. I'm fine with that. Does Slop… Do they have any locations in mall food courts? Yeah, I think they definitely do. They do. They've got little kiosks. Really? Yeah, you can go. You can get it. No, it sounds interesting to me. All the food that they serve, it sounds pretty darn fascinating. No, it's not interesting or fascinating. I would love to try it if you're willing to go to the mall with me. You're going to buy for me? You're going to buy me some, huh? Of course I'm buying. Perfect. I'm always buying. You're always buying because I'm always selling. No, you're buying because you've got the money bags, all right? Money bags in your green pants and whatnot. All right, let me get my stuff together. Let me make myself pretty because if I'm going out in public, I've got to be like that pig. People are like, oh my God, is that that pig? And I'm like, yeah, of course it is. Hey, what's going on, bro? Like that. Yeah, yeah, no, okay. Okay, you finish this up and I'm going to get ready. I'm going to call Petey Porridge also and I'm going to… Porridge Petey? Porridge Petey, yeah. And we're going to see if he can hook us up. Okay. Okay. Bye, everybody. 2017. You know what I mean? It's me, Aloysius. Hugs and hearts. Bloop, bloop, bloop, bloop. All right, good job. Thanks so much for hanging out, pig. You made me feel better. You actually made me feel a lot better about everything. And you know what? That's how I want to feel and that's how I want you to feel is better.

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

  • Bumperpodcast #208: There’s a pirate on this ship!

    Bumperpodcast #208: There’s a pirate on this ship!

    The Bumperpodcast is taken over by a pirate! What’s his name? I have no idea … and neither does he! Listen and learn … On this tyrannical episode of the Bumperpodcast!

    Comedian, Natty Bumpercar talks about some junk with Robot and Pig, and some other junk in today’s edition of the Bumperpodcast.

    Are you pirate-ish? Let us know by sending an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com.

    About This Episode

    In this hilarious episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar transforms into a forgetful pirate captain who realizes the organizational challenges of running a pirate ship where nobody knows anyone's name. The rambling pirate contemplates the difficulties of delegating tasks like swabbing the deck and catching fish when every crew member is just "pirate man." After considering solutions like chore boards, continuing education classes, and a gold star reward system, the pirate captain ultimately abandons these civilized ideas and embraces the chaotic pirate life of stealing, looting, and pillaging. This absurdist monologue showcases Natty's improvisational comedy style as he navigates the logical paradoxes of pirate ship management.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I'm going to be stealing your women and your children and your booty and your gold and your frankincense and your myrrh and your Kit Kats, because I love Kit Kats.”

    — Natty Bumpercar (as Pirate)

    “We're gonna have all the different chores of the ship upon the board. It's gonna say, swab the deck, hang the sails, get the fish, you know, all the different things that happen.”

    — Natty Bumpercar (as Pirate)

    “We don't care about names. We don't care about reading. We don't care about writing because we are pirates, and all we care about is stealing and ravaging.”

    — Natty Bumpercar (as Pirate)

    Topics: #pirates #identity #organization #absurdistcomedy #workplacehumor #kitkats #improvisation

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: Did you notice that there was a lot of complaining and whining and hooting and hinting and hinting me in last week on the Bumper Podcast? Well, this is, uh, my name is, uh, I'm a pirate, probably. And my name, yeah, well, my name is, I don't remember my name, because I'm a pirate, and when people see me, people know my name, and so I don't have to go around telling people what my name is. I waff off my ship into the port, and I steal everything, and people know my name, but I would just by my face, and a little bit by my voice as well, but they don't necessarily, I don't have to, I don't have a business card. Why would I? I'm a pirate. Pirates don't, I can't read, and I don't care what my name is anymore. You care what my name is. Because I'm the one who's going to be stealing things from you. I'm going to be stealing your women and your children and your booty and your gold and your frankincense and your myrrh and your Kit Kats, because I love Kit Kats. I don't understand how they're made. There's, there's cookie crisp, and then there's chocolate, and they're all squished together into tiny microcosmic little things, and of the pirate ship, we all break off one for our friends, and we say, give me a break. Har! Give me a break. Break me off a piece of that. There. Har. Bar. But it's difficult, because as we're all pirates, and we, none of us care much about our names, then we look around the pirate ship, and when you have to get something done, it's like, hey, there, you, pirate man over there, and then the one looks around, because no one, everyone's a pirate man on the ship, and so they don't know who's talking to who, because they're all, pirates, and so you never get anything done. It's a, really, we should probably figure out some sort of a naming mechanism so that people know who's talking to who at all times. It makes the ships very difficult. It makes every little thing a lot more difficult than it should have been if you could have just said, hello there, pirate Bob, I need you to go and get me some fish. There's a lot of fish that they would, a lot of, that's a lot of, that's a big job on the ship. Who's gonna get the fish? And if we could have a board, maybe, on the ship. Now, I'm thinking we're probably going to need to take some sort of reading lessons, where we all read, and we have names, and we have a, a chore board. Yeah, that's what we need. We need a chore board, and we're gonna have all the different chores of the ship upon the board. It's gonna say, uh, swab the deck, uh, hang the sails, uh, get the fish, you know, all the different things that happen. And then we can be like, uh, pirate Bob, you do Tuesday. Uh, who's gonna do the laboratories? That's what we call bathrooms on the pirate ship. No, we don't. No, no. We don't call it laboratories. No, we don't. We don't call it laboratories. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. That's right. Over the rail. Because we're pirates. Good joke. Uh, uh, pirate man. No, you. You're the one who said the pirate Right there, I'm pointing at you because, yes, with the stripy shirt, black and white, not blue. Yes, black, white, you. Funny joke. You know what? We're also on the board. We're gonna have gold stars, and if anyone has a funny joke or a good idea, they're gonna get a gold star next to their names. So, here's what we're gonna do. We're gonna take some continuing education classes. We're going to learn how to read just basic stuff you understand. Nothing too hard. And then from there, we're all gonna get names. What's that? Good point. We're probably going to need to have names before we do the continuing education so that we can fill out all the forms and all the paperwork and take the classes. Are you correct? We can't fill out the paperwork if we don't know how to read and we don't know how to write. This is never gonna work. Is this what we've done? We've never done this. Okay. So, what is your plan? Excellent. We don't care about names. We don't care about reading. We don't care about writing because we are pirates, and all we care about is stealing and ravaging, right? Yes, and looting and pillaging and more stealing. So, no more names. You're a pirate. You're a pirate blue pants. You're a pirate red bird, and I'm the captain pirate of the whole ship, I think. Is that my name? Huzzah!

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe