Tag: Headquarters

  • Bumperpodcast 76 – Bye-bye Bamboo!

    Bumperpodcast 76 – Bye-bye Bamboo!

    HOLY COW! Today is the last day of intern Bamboo’s internship … and everyone at Headquarters probably has a huge surprise in store … Maybe it’s a party?!

    You will probably have to listen to the Bumperpodcast to find out!

    Whoop-Whoop!

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    About This Episode

    In this chaotic episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar, Robot, and Aloysious J. Pig attempt to throw a goodbye party for intern Bamboo on her last day. The plan falls apart when Bamboo leaves before the party even starts, leaving the three characters standing around with party fixings and no guest of honor. Pig reveals he's not a fan of Robot and tries to spell his way out of an awkward situation. When Bamboo briefly returns, it's only to retrieve her forgotten purse, crushing their party hopes and prompting Robot to desperately beg to leave with her rather than stay with his bumbling co-hosts.

    Memorable Quotes

    “is there any way if we have this party it could just be you and i hanging out because i'm not a fan of r o b r o i can't spell it but i think you know who i'm pointing at”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    “hey bamboo you came back for your party this is so exciting because everybody got together we got stuff and fixings and everything”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “no no no no no no no no no no no take me with you don't leave me here with them”

    — Robot

    Topics: #goodbyeparty #workplacecomedy #failedplans #awkwardmoments #friendshipdynamics #interns

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Robot

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: okay see you later wait wait wait oh no wait everybody today oh bumper podcast today was today was intern bamboo's last day and she was we had a we were gonna oh wait a second robot come here hi robot are you ready for the big party no there's not gonna be a big party because bamboo already left she didn't hear at the beginning of the well i guess you couldn't have because it just happened but at the beginning of the bumper podcast she came up to the microphone and she said something like blah and then she shut the door and walked away oh dear oh dear indeed everybody it's oh no indeed stop cutting me off the robot i am a pig who is here to have a party i brought all of the the fixings did you bring the fixings yeah wait a minute oh i'm looking around the room here i see bumper car me i see robot boo that no by the way um where's bamboo uh that's the whole thing pig before we were gonna have a big party robot was gonna set up you were gonna bring the fixings and then what happened was uh i bamboo was here and beginning the show she she said goodbye and then she uh she uh she left so there's not there's i mean we can still have a party do you guys want to have a party i don't just the three of us like seriously bumper car this is between you and me okay no robots here in the room with us but is there any way if we have this party it could just be you and i hanging out because i'm not a fan of r o b r o i can't spell it but i think you know who i'm pointing at and looking at currently right now all right r o you want to help me out r o i can't r o b spell i'm a pig just i don't want him

    Robot: all right all right oh the door just opened

    Natty Bumpercar: hey bamboo you came back for your party this is so exciting because everybody got together we got stuff and fixings and everything and we're so glad that you actually i just forgot my purse all right

    Robot: no no no no no no no no no no no take me with you don't leave me here with them

  • Bumperpodcast 68 – Reintroduction!

    Bumperpodcast 68 – Reintroduction!

    Allow us to reintroduce ourselves! Everyone is onboard for the inaugural Bumperpodcast at New Headquarters … All excited to tell you about the fun new stuff that is going on and …

    Then – no one shows up … except for … Well – I’m not going to give the secret away here – now am I?!

    We might even learn how to spell a little bit on today’s Bumperpodcast!

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    About This Episode

    In episode 68, Natty Bumpercar welcomes listeners to the brand new Bumperpodcast headquarters after taking just one week off to move. Natty hilariously spells out his entire name and describes how moving boxes have been repurposed into castles and rocket ships throughout the new space. Despite planning to have the entire cast present for the big headquarters debut—including Mott the Sheep, Doodle Poodle, Baby Emerson, Aloysious J. Pig, Yetkin the Moose, and Cinnamon the Horse—everyone mysteriously disappears. Only Robot remains, and he reveals a mischievous secret about why everyone else is absent. This chaotic and funny episode captures the improvisational spirit of the show during a major transition.

    Memorable Quotes

    “we aren't fooling around we took old headquarters we put it into boxes we moved to new headquarters and now we've got castles and rocket ships”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “i told him that you only wanted me on the show that you only wanted robot the show because everybody loves”

    — Robot

    Topics: #newheadquarters #moving #spelling #castles #rocketships #robot #mystery

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Robot

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah this is the bumper podcast and we're in new headquarters it's so exciting everybody cheer it's uh where i thought i'd gathered everybody up i everybody anybody i don't need them i had so let me here's what we're gonna do we decided well we decided everyone was gonna be here and that didn't work out but i'm in control of this part so what i'm gonna do is i'm gonna reintroduce myself my name is natty bumper car natty bumper car n-a-t-t-y b-u-m-p hold on i'm supposed to write this down anybody got any scratch paper n-a-t-t-y b-u-m-p e bump b-u-m-p bump e i just had to break it down b-u-m p-e-r bumper bumper yeah bumper car b-u-m-p-e-r-c-a-r that's my name natty bumper car and you guys are here at the bumper podcast which is great because we haven't seen you in like well i mean we took a week off it wasn't that crazy i moved to whole headquarters and all we did was take a week off what i mean this is devotion this determination this is kind of crazy time is what it is what have you guys been doing in the last week we've been i mean we've got boxes everywhere which is fun because you know what you do with boxes you take them and then you put them together and you build castles so there's actually we have castles inside of headquarters and rocket ships yes like really what we've done is i mean we aren't fooling around we took old headquarters we put it into boxes we moved to new headquarters and now we've got a new headquarters and now we've got a new headquarters and now we've got a new headquarters and now we've got castles and rocket ships these things don't normally go together all that well rockets and castle ships wait a minute anyway so what i was saying was i had everyone i had mott the sheep he was here he was gonna say hi i had doodle poodle he had kid i mean he was walking around uh had baby emerson uh pig was here uh yetkin the moose cinnamon the horse i mean like the place was packed full of people and i don't know where anybody went to i do i do hi robot how's it going well you better tell the secret really quick because the show's running out really soon and everybody's gonna want to hear your secret is well do you know where everyone is of course i do

    Robot: i told him that you only wanted me on the show that you only wanted robot the show because everybody loves

  • Bumperpodcast 66 – Moving!

    Bumperpodcast 66 – Moving!

    It’s all about Headquarters . . .  why?! Because – Headquarters is getting moved from over here to over there.

    Moving. Moving. Moving. All of the world is moving all around and all about.

    We also learn that putting Cranberry juice into the morning cup of tea is a delicious treat that gets a Bumpercar’s day started out super-duper right!

    Listen today to here all of that and a whole lot more – today – on the Bumperpodcast!

    Don’t forget to email me your questions, musings and whatnot at bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com.

    Hooray!

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    About This Episode

    In this episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar returns after a week-long absence to explain the chaos at headquarters. The show is in the midst of moving to a new location, with everything being packed up and moved. Natty is clearly frazzled by the relocation process, admitting he doesn't even know the new address yet beyond that it starts with the letter C. The episode captures Natty's energetic, stream-of-consciousness style as he discusses packing up elephants' trunks, drinking cranberry juice tea that turns into rocket fuel, and the general confusion that comes with moving too much. It's a short but amusing glimpse into the behind-the-scenes upheaval of the podcast's production.

    Memorable Quotes

    “Too much moving equals confused bumper car. I mean, I just learned my address for headquarters this.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “I put a little cranberry juice in my tea this morning. Oh, that's a good trick for me to find out about. Evidently, cranberry juice makes my tea in the morning rocket fuel.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #moving #headquarters #behindthescenes #cranberryjuice #confusion #anxiety

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: Where in the world, where in the beans, where in the hill of beans have you been, Daddy Bumpercar? We've been missing you. You weren't here last week and the website hasn't been updated except for all those Mott the Sheep pictures, which don't even really seem like updates because it just seems like you're putting pictures of a sheep on the website. Where have you been? Well, calm down, everybody. There's crazy stuff going on over here in headquarters. Yeah, in headquarters, around headquarters, all about headquarters because you know what's going on? We're pulling up the tent stakes, pulling up the tent poles, the elephants are all around. They're gathering up their belongings. They're gathering up their peanuts and their, um, their, their, their, their things. Wait a minute. Their trunks. That's what I was trying to say. They're packing their trunks. I wish I would have said that just like I just said it. And not like I had to think about it. Hello, everyone. We're moving headquarters. We're in the midst of moving headquarters. Everything's going into boxes. Everything's getting wrapped up tightly and nicely because we don't want to break anything. Even though, unfortunately, sometimes when we move, things get broken. Sometimes hearts get broken when you move. I know. It's so sad. What have you guys been doing? Like, I know I could just sit here and talk about myself. Sometimes I worry about you guys, too, especially when I haven't talked to you for a whole week. Am I going too fast? Wow. What was in my tea that I drank? Oh, that's right. I put a little cranberry juice in my tea this morning. Oh, that's a good trick for me to find out about. Evidently, cranberry juice makes my tea in the morning rocket fuel. It really just winds me up. Well, not only the tea, but the whole fact that headquarters is moving. I'm not going to lie to you guys. I was freaked out. I don't like to move. I move too much. Too much moving equals confused bumper car. I mean, I just learned my address for headquarters this. We call this place headquarters this. We're calling new headquarters headquarters that. I don't even know where it is. People say to me, well, bumper car, where's your new headquarters? And I say to them. I don't know. And I'm not even being like obtuse. I honestly genuinely don't know. It's in. I say it's in a place that begins with the letter C. And that's not enough for people. People want more. People want a letter C. You're moving to the letter C bumper car. That doesn't make any sense. Why are you being so like that? And I said like this.

    Unknown: She's going to. I said you're pushing the collaborative. You're pushing the collaborative. We're gonna make sure everybody's back up next year. Keep it up. Be ahuman. We're not gonna let it hurt our friends. We're not gonna let anybody make you out on campus unless you take over. No! You gotta come back over next year, bitches. But we did it anyways. I know, didn't we? Always. I'm out. I'm out. Bye guys. Bye guys. I wanna kiss. Take a while. I don't know. Could get all these things over with. Bye.

  • Bumperpodcast 64 – Rude Bears . . .

    Bumperpodcast 64 – Rude Bears . . .

    There is someone at the door banging away . . . could it be a rude polar bear? Why would I even think that was a possibility?
    Listen to find out today – on the Bumperpodcast!
    Don’t forget to email me your questions, musings and whatnot at bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com.
    Hooray!

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    About This Episode

    In this episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar deals with an unusual cold snap at Coffee Can Alley headquarters. A mysterious vortex of cold has attracted polar bears who keep knocking on the door, causing Socks the dog to bark incessantly. Natty recounts a bizarre encounter with a particularly rude polar bear visitor wearing boots who engaged in some truly disgusting behavior. This short comedy episode features Natty's trademark storytelling style and absurd humor about arctic wildlife with questionable manners.

    Memorable Quotes

    “this polar bear was wearing a pair of boots which i thought to be interesting but you know maybe it was because it was so cold”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “he started chewing on his nails right in front of my face how gross is that”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “he took off his boot pulled up his foot and started chewing on his toenails”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #polarbears #coldweather #coffeecanalley #dogs #neighbors #manners #absurdcomedy #headquarters

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: bumper podcast it's me natty bumper car your best friend in coffee can alley and other places if you'll have me we gotta turn this music off though really quick somebody's at the door shut the music off we don't want them nowhere here shut them off come on robot come on oh thank you this is much nicer and quieter you guys it's been really really cold around coffee can alley especially around headquarters i feel like there's a vortex of cold that is surrounding headquarters right now what we've been getting is a bunch of polar bears that just come up to headquarters and they just knock on the door like that repeatedly i don't know if you can hear them but that makes socks the dog bark that's right irving brown socks the dog he barks when somebody knocks at the door especially if it's a polar bear did you hear him he doesn't like it when people knock especially polar bears can i tell you why well here's the story bumper podcast by the way it's nice to see you i should tell you that i actually broke away from other important things i'm supposed to be doing right now to talk to you you don't have to say thanks or anything but i do hope that you appreciate it because we certainly appreciate you anyway back to the story at hand one day this polar bear comes knocking on our headquarters door just like that knock knock knock knock knock and i didn't know at the time and so i went and i answered the door because you know maybe he was a neighbor in need of some sugar or some milk or something or whatever polar bears need i didn't know i did look out of the peephole though you should always look out of your peephole bumper podcast if someone knocking at your door because you don't know who it is me i answered the door when it was a polar bear which doesn't make a whole bunch of sense but you know that's fine so this polar bear was wearing a pair of boots which i thought to be interesting but i guess it was because it was so cold that he was wearing boots so it made a little bit of sense and while he was talking to me can i tell you what this polar bear did he started chewing on his nails right in front of my face how gross is that right in front of my face you come to headquarters knock on my door make my dog bark and then you start chewing your nails your polar bear nails right in front of my face that's ridiculous bumper podcast you should never do that and so i said excuse me could you stop that you know what he did he took off his boot pulled up his foot and started chewing on his toenails

    Unknown: and then he took off his foot and started chewing his toenails

  • Bumperpodcast 63 – Meetings . . .

    Bumperpodcast 63 – Meetings . . .

    Meetings and meetings and electronic mails and video chats and face to faces and telephone calls . . . Man! Life around Headquarters has gotten nutty-busy!

    But – then – there is a glitch in the show when I realize that I can no longer say my own name . . . Was it one of the meetings that I had? Was it something that I ate?

    Listen to find out today – on the Bumperpodcast!

    Don’t forget to email me your questions, musings and whatnot at bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com.

    Hooray!

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    About This Episode

    In episode 63 of the Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar finds himself in a bizarre predicament when he suddenly can't say his own name properly. After a series of business meetings involving press kits and website changes, Natty discovers the surprising culprit: his name is in the process of being trademarked. The episode features Natty's hilarious confusion as he tries to figure out what's happening, while also revealing that fan-favorite character Pig continues to steal the spotlight at live shows. This short comedic episode showcases the absurdist humor that makes Bumperpodcast a unique comedy experience.

    Memorable Quotes

    “People come up to me at shows and they say, is pig here? Will we be seeing pig tonight? Some nights I say yes and they're very happy.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “My name is in the process of being trademarked. What?”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #trademark #identitycrisis #businessmeetings #liveshows #pig #website #presskit

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: well well well if it isn't the bumper podcast it's so great to see you like i'm really thrilled i'm also really tired i'm not gonna lie to you it's been a busy busy few days busy doing what well i had some meetings and i talked to some people on the telephone and i sent some people some electronic mail you know all the normal stuff that a bumper does wait a bumper why can't i say it anymore my name is this is the bumper podcast okay i was able to say that i talked for a while and then it's uh me me Wow that is strange i evidently can't say my name anymore let's go back over those meetings that i was having and see if maybe one of them could have possibly messed with how i say my name is that even possible is that something that can happen i don't know let's see i uh i had a meeting you With someone who said, you know, he said, hey, here's what you need to do. Hey, here's what you need to do, my friend. He said, press kit. Make a press kit. That's fine. Makes sense. Make a video press kit type explaining thing. That also makes sense and seems like great advice. Change your website. Your website isn't doing it, which is depressing because that makes me tired. Having to think about changing my website. It exhausts me. But I don't think that has anything to do with my name either. We also talked about pig. Everyone loves pig. I'm not going to lie to you. People come up to me at shows and they say, is pig here? Will we be seeing pig tonight? Some nights I say yes and they're very happy. Some nights I have to say no. Cinnamon the horse is here. Maybe he's going to. Have you met my friend Yitkin the moose? Maybe he's going to entertain you. What other meeting did I have that would have messed with my name? Going through my papers here, shuffling through. Ah, here it is. Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, bumper podcast. My name is in the process of being trademarked. What?

    Unknown: Thrill the opening of Yeng . . . .