Tag: family

Bumperpodcast #415 – Season 2 – Field Day

Natty reminisces about field day. Rufus and Pig reminisce about food!

The Bumperpodcast with Natty Bumpercar is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!! Also, The Bumperpodcast can now be found on the https://non-productive.com/ network. Yay!!!! Also, also, we have a Patreon page now!!! https://www.patreon.com/nattybumpercar

Another story about saving baby animals!

A feel good story!

Previous episode!

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Aloysius J. Pig 0:04
Okay, first things first, I really got to say hello, radio Fremont class today, we’re really happy you’re here and we’re happy that you’re gonna stay, and yada yada yada that you hit a play hip hop array, right? It’s me. I was just jpg.

Natty Bumpercar 0:22
Okay, yeah, sorry. It’s me. Natty Bumpercar started to start to step on you like that big no problem. How was Did you practice it before? Because it doesn’t sound like you did.

Aloysius J. Pig 0:32
I? Well, I was freestyle. And that’s what you do. And it’s what you in the bass. It’s what you do. You know, you you come up onto a hot mic and you’re like, Oh, I’m gonna spit some bass. I’m gonna say I’m gonna, you know, I got some rhymes. I got some bars. Bars. I’m gonna. I’m gonna give it to the people right now. Gift. I’m gonna give you the gift of my words.

Natty Bumpercar 0:54
The gift of gab from Okay. Well, great. Thanks. Hi, radio. Fremont glare. It’s me Natty Bumpercar Here. This is the bumper podcast. It’s a weekly podcast, but we are lovingly working with radio free Montclair and giving you guys first dibs at the episodes. So if you ever want to go back and listen to any of the other hundreds of episodes, just look up Natty Bumpercar and the bumper podcast. And you’ll have you will have things in your ears for a long time, which is a good thing.

Aloysius J. Pig 1:29
I don’t know. I

Rufus T. Rufus 1:30
know not. I decided everyone. This is me. Rufus to Rufus. I’m a lawyer here for the bumper podcast and I don’t really dip my toe into marketing because I feel like that’s the dark arts. I feel like it’s mystical, magical stuff that I don’t want to be involved with. But I think probably seeing people you will have stuff in your ears is not the best

Aloysius J. Pig 1:55
tagline. Yeah, well, I did go to a restaurant once. And on the front it said welcome to this restaurant. When you leave, you’ll have food in you.

Natty Bumpercar 2:07
Okay, so it wasn’t even like we’re friends meat or anything. It was just your you are gonna have food in you. At least it was food. It wasn’t just like your belly. Oh, have something some something.

Rufus T. Rufus 2:19
I just I used to eat when I was a boy child I used to eat at a restaurant called something something and whenever you go in, they’d have a special of the day. And I’d have to say is it’s a young man, what would you like to eat today? And I’d say you want to order the spreadsheet you just say add like little salt and salt. Yeah. And then you’d get it they’d bring it out to you or whatever it was for the day.

Aloysius J. Pig 2:43
I can’t believe you used to go to some some I’d ever do ever have to some some SassaFrass souffle. Oh, it was some magical stuff. Well, okay,

Natty Bumpercar 2:53
before we start, this is great. You guys are going down memory lane. But before this is actually an episode kind of about memory lane. Not restaurants. But about field day because this week it’s Field Day at the kids school

Rufus T. Rufus 3:08
Aloysius. I’ll talk to you on the side about something some I really feel like we could probably open a franchise around here. Can you imagine the lines? People I think people be nervous at first but then once they get a taste Yeah, they do. They’d be right in they have some some special all day all day long Swan songs on special running song some special with extra gravy.

Aloysius J. Pig 3:31
I mean, yeah, I think maybe we could do that. Put our focus on some some and move away from this old podcasting because this is a guy you go ahead and talk about your field day.

Natty Bumpercar 3:44
Okay, cool. Um, I love that I’m the backup plan now. So anyway, I remember growing up with field day, and you know, it was we used to do things like three three legged race and I don’t know like water balloon toss, and there was like a giant jump rope and everybody that would be spinning and you’d have to jump the rope and whatever. And it was a tug of war. I remember very specifically in tug of war it was it was on an asphalt blacktop and my team last but not only last, but like we I don’t know how the people pulled us and drugged us across the blacktop is what I remember. And

Rufus T. Rufus 4:30
I remember the tug of war now. So remember, at my school, when I went back to the schoolhouse, the school mom would say, everybody, it’s time for Field Day, and we’d all get very excited. But you understand I’m a little bit older than you and I grew up in a more rural area, aggregate farmers whatnot, and for fun for us Field Day was and they would just send us out into the field. You know, go on out into the field. Now

Aloysius J. Pig 5:02
that’s so funny because where I grew up, I grew up on a farm because I’m a pig and all you know, and for us, everyday was field day the way they’d say, We they’d feed us they still eat. So we like to say, Okay, I’ve got to the field and we had just one sheep. She would say, oh, it’s field day, you get all excited. I’m like it yesterday was good. Like, tomorrow is gonna be field day. Every day is field day. We’re on a farm.

Natty Bumpercar 5:33
Okay. So obviously, you guys, your experiences are very different from my experience, like because I was a kid in school.

Rufus T. Rufus 5:42
I’m pretty sure I indicated that I was also a young young living child in a school. I mentioned my school mom. Yeah.

Natty Bumpercar 5:51
I agree. So but the so the difference is, so we had like, you know, a playground and we would play like dodgeball, which was super fun. And there was we played like, capture the flag, and just all kinds of silly races, like, egg on a spoon.

Aloysius J. Pig 6:10
I know, I know, we’re not supposed to talk about something, something you already told me that. But they had this thing on the weekends, it was called the egg on a spoon. It was delicious. It was like this deviled egg. And it was right on the spoon. Right. So you didn’t have to like pick it up and get you know, that egg goop on you. It was just right down around the spoon. And so you’d say like, Hey, can we get an appetizer of egg on a spoon and then they bring you out I think there was six or eight or whatever. And on a on a little platter. And all the eggs are on different spoons. And so then everybody could just reach in grade the spoon, an egg on the spoon, but sometimes the egg would actually fall off and you’d lose it so that’s that’s so funny because that’s exactly what the egg on the spoon race is given deviled eggs to children who are outside that sounds like a good recipe for for some some stomach

Rufus T. Rufus 7:08
issues. No, no, no,

Natty Bumpercar 7:09
no sorry. So they’re not even they’re not real eggs. They’re just like plastic eggs like, like you find it Easter or whatever. And but they go on on spoons, and so they’re kind of slippery. And it’s a relay so the kids have to run back and forth with the egg on the spoon. The spoon drops you have to bend down, pick the egg up, put it back on the spoon and keep going until your team wins. There’s a lot of there’s a lot of team activities that feel

Aloysius J. Pig 7:34
it sounds like a it’s like a team building exercise or their trust falls and stuff like that. I think Hey, Rufus, do you think we should have a field day for the for the bumper podcast? Like maybe get everybody together and have I mean wouldn’t be many people obviously yeah, we could I don’t know we could try

Natty Bumpercar 7:51
so there’s no trust falls in grade school. I don’t and that’s the saddest thing is like field day pretty much in grade school like it doesn’t happen I don’t think maybe it does in middle school and stuff but it’s why why not just keep having field days everybody loves Field Day kids freak out for field day because it’s so much fun because it’s very low stakes but there’s also competition and and and who wins everybody wins because it’s Field Day

Rufus T. Rufus 8:24
sorry Aloysius I was over here looking through our contracts and what actually it is this is page 14 section eight subset F which I guess could stand for field day where it says that we are actually not allowed to participate in sporting activities as a group that’s no good. Yes and No of course unfortunately you know that this what this came from correct

Aloysius J. Pig 8:55
Ah wow, I didn’t even think about it. It’s just because in a time that Doodle Poodle Okay, everybody let somebody say

Doodle Poodle 9:05
hi, it’s me. I was just over in my studio making say to every party her podcast what

Producer 9:27
do the Buddha Nature me i producer and nothing as stepped out. I don’t know where he went exactly. But every day the gang here was talking about Field Day. And then reverse suggested that perhaps we should have a bumper podcast Field Day and but then he was looking through some papers and evidently there was

Aloysius J. Pig 9:51
it was an episode there was a thing that happened and we tried feel that’s such a section If I can’t remember exactly who was not sure Okay

listen, doodle poodle everybody has put it behind you. Everybody has forgotten and we’re gonna move on and I’m sorry that you were even brought into this this was actually you know this is honestly a mistake obviously. And you go back and do your totals and everything is gonna be okay

Doodle Poodle 10:25
I just want to make sure that everybody’s not mad at me or nothing though guys I’m still pretty sad about everything that happened and I want everybody to forgive me but I’m not gonna

Producer 10:42
send you some kind of upset don’t ever you should come down do you don’t need all everything is going to be a girl Hi

Natty Bumpercar 10:50
natty hey did I do to poodle just walk past me in the hall and he seemed a little bit upset is everything okay?

Aloysius J. Pig 10:57
Yeah, we were talking about field day and somebody said his name and then he came in but then he seemed like he got kind of upset and yeah,

Rufus T. Rufus 11:06
I saw him as well. Where you got to do to someone referred to the incident because you know we were contractually we’re not supposed to talk about the incident

Producer 11:15
i May I might I may I might have said something but I tried not to be specific at all. I didn’t want to upset him I am feel bad now that if he’s upset we were having such a nice episode talking about the restaurant restaurant and the fate of day memories. By the way in the swamp school where I went because I’m a frog we had a beautiful field. Oh, that’s good. Lily. Lily pad from toss

Natty Bumpercar 11:44
you play frog toss but your frogs what?

Aloysius J. Pig 11:46
None of this makes any sense to me. Hey, we’re a real fish you want to get out of here.

Rufus T. Rufus 11:51
Let’s go talk about something some French Ah, all

Natty Bumpercar 11:55
right. Well have fun it Field Day.

Outro 12:09
The bumper podcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp with Natty Bumpercar and some of his pals. It is family friendly, clean and ridiculous. Thanks a bundle for listening. If you love our show, and you’d like to help support the podcast, check out our Patreon page at https colon forward slash forward slash www.patreon.com forward slash Natty Bumpercar also pretty please subscribe wherever you get your podcasts, share it with everyone everywhere. post about it on all of the social medias or leave a rating and review. The bumper podcast is produced at headquarters in coffee can alley it’s recorded mixed and produced by producer. The bumper podcast features contributions from Aloysius jpg Rufus T Rufus doodle poodle, robot trunks and a gaggle of other silly rascals. Our head talker is probably Natty Bumpercar. We also have an absurd newsletter. Check it out and subscribe at Natty bumpercar.com/subscribe Also, you can follow me on Instagram and Twitter at Natty Bumpercar Hugs and hearts See you soon.

NonPro 13:29
This has been a non productive media presentation, executive producer Franco Blaue. This program and many others like it on the nonproductive network is distributed under a Creative Commons Attribution non commercial no derivatives license. Please share it but ask before trying to change it or sell it. For more information visit non dash productive.com

Transcribed by https://otter.ai
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June 11, 2022
Bumperpodcast #378 – Overwhelmed

Natty is completely overwhelmed – and is trying to figure out how to become more whelmed – while avoiding being underwhelmed. It’s a lot to take in – but, he’ll try his hardest!

The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

About This Episode

Natty Bumpercar returns to the Bumperpodcast after a hiatus to discuss feeling overwhelmed by the state of the world. In this introspective episode, Natty explores the etymology of 'overwhelmed,' 'underwhelmed,' and 'whelmed,' wondering why we can't just be normally whelmed. He shares candid stories about quarantine life, homeschooling his kids, dealing with a toy-destroying dog, and the challenges of performing comedy over Zoom. Natty reflects on the strange nature of time during quarantine, unfinished projects piling up, and finding silver linings in spending more family time together, even when grocery bills seem impossibly high.

Memorable Quotes

“I looked at myself in the mirror and I said today is not the day that I'm gonna break… and as I left the room I heard the mirror whisper 'or is it' and I was like whoa hey mirror I thought you had my back”
— Natty Bumpercar

“I'm hoping that this podcast is leaving you considerably whelmed. Not overwhelmed, not underwhelmed. I want to whelm you.”
— Natty Bumpercar

Topics: #quarantinelife #overwhelmed #parenting #homeschooling #comedy #zoom #time #family

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: oh bumper podcast what's been what are you doing who what are you where you been at where you been hiding from me or i've been missing you uh i know you're thinking over there whoa whoa don't don't point fingers at us we're the listeners we're the bumper podcast geteers where have you been natty natty bumper car who's supposed to be recording this on a weekly basis and hasn't for a while i don't know i try i even i here's the thing i have been overwhelmed uh can just considerably overwhelmed with uh the state of the world and uh i just i i haven't been able to get to it and then i started to think what does overwhelmed even mean like and then i started researching it and it was pretty cool because i feel like i'm constantly overwhelmed uh and then i was just like have i ever just been whelmed i would like to just at some point in my life instead of being overwhelmed just be whelmed just be uh just a baseline whelmed uh there's there's also you know sometimes i'm underwhelmed but uh currently overwhelmed so i'd like to find a nice a nice middle ground um and so what i started to do is i started to think about what does overwhelmed a thing well overwhelmed um it it just means to to bury or drown beneath a huge mass it's like a whoa that sounds intense you were overwhelmed right and uh so which is how i feel like it's it's cool because i think it used to be more of a uh almost like a nautical term where like a ship would be overwhelmed by the waves right and uh they it eventually kind of started to mean that uh you know you're it's you're just anything that can is taking you down is beating you down you you could become overwhelmed so in this scenario i'm the ship i'm the ship out on a sea on a very stormy sea and the waves are crashing over me they're overwhelming me they're threatening to take me the ship out of my ship down but no no no my friends they will not take they will not take me down no sir i um i did i woke up the other morning and i looked in the mirror and i was trying to give myself a pep talk and uh i i looked at the mirror and i looked at myself in the mirror and i said today is not the day that i'm gonna break and uh and i felt good about myself a little know you gotta build yourself up sometimes and as i as i left the room with a mirror in it i heard the mirror whisper you know or is it and i was like whoa hey mirror i thought you had my back and it's just like i have your reflection not your back and i was like ah good point good point um anyway so uh underwhelmed is another thing right are you overwhelmed are you underwhelmed underwhelmed isn't even a phrase it doesn't make any sense because uh if overwhelmed is talking about the waves crashing over the the the bow of the ship threatening to to pull it under you know one's ever going to be like ah the ocean is very calm today the boat is calm very underwhelmed now of course you might know what it's like ah we went to see that new movie i was super excited about it i didn't live up to my standards i was pretty underwhelmed so wait you're saying that the waves just were uh very calm at your at your ship i don't know and then and then whelmed i really feel like we should bring it back or i don't even know if it was ever there i'm hoping that this podcast is leaving you considerably whelmed not i don't want to be overwhelmed i don't want to be too much for you because there's too much else going on and i certainly don't want to you know uh be aiming too low i don't want to underwhelm you no i want to overwhelm you i want if you ever if somebody's like oh you listen to the bumper podcast yeah i do are you a bumper podcast couture i suppose i am how do you feel about that in one word can you describe to me uh the bumper podcast one word and you can just look at them straight in the eye and you can say whelmed it's gonna that's probably gonna go on our business card we're we're gonna hire a skywriter to you uh you know just write uh to an advertisement in the sky so people can know to tune in and they'll say it'll just say whelmed and we'll forget to uh actually put the bumper podcast or anything that ties it to us but eventually enough people are gonna know that when they hear the word whelmed boom they're talking about they should be thinking about the bumper podcast in my opinion the dog just joined me i have to tell you she's been completely underwhelmed today by the amount of attention and love that she's received and um what she's done to make up for that lack of love and attention is to destroy toys not my toys because i keep them in the high ground all right and she will not overwhelm my defenses to get to these toys the children however leave their toys scattered around the house everywhere that the dog can reach them and i uh a lot of times i'll wake up to shrieking ah yee ah oh which is a completely overwhelming way to start your day and i burst down the stairs and i say what's going on down here the dog ate our toy ah did she overwhelm your defenses no the toy was on the ground i'm like you can't leave the toy you can't leave the toys on the ground your toys look like her dog toys so she's going to eat them but they don't listen because why would they i don't know nothing i'm just their dad dad's that's a fun thing with kids is they're like ah dad you don't know nothing you don't know my my worries you don't know nothing about me my life i'm like buddy i helped make you like what are you talking about i know i've been here every day i know i know a little bit about you but i don't know anything about you about you uh but no no no no no dad you don't you come you're completely underwhelming me as a parent i'm like all right that's we don't have to keep using the over under and the whelmed during the episode um i was trying to figure out when the last time that i sent out an episode was and then i realized i don't even know what today is i've completely given up on time we did an episode of a while ago uh about time being linear and time folding in on itself and how strange time can be and then we got into nostalgia and stuff and the thing is is i don't it's i wake up every day and i don't i'm just like like we had to do the kids homework this morning and they were like what's today what assignment do i do and i was just like oof i had to look at my calendar i was just like it's uh well obviously it's tuesday and then i'm like how is it tuesday that's weird i mean yesterday was monday huh all right sure but i don't really believe i mean it's just like there's nothing uh solid concrete about the days that that are keeping me and my brain kind of in line with what day it is um which is a struggle when all this quarantine started i was i was very i was cleaning all the time and i was making lists of stuff to do and then i think just the more and more stuff that i was doing i have all these projects and i'm like oh my god i'm gonna have to do this project and i would start a project and then i would realize i don't have all the pieces to finish the project and i can't go to the store and so that's on the list and the more unfinished projects that i would get the more overwhelmed i would get right and and so then i would my list would just keep growing longer and then you know you wake up every day and you're just like okay we got to get the kids food we got to get their school stuff ready we got to talk to the teachers we got to talk to the school we got to talk to we got it we got to talk to the teachers we got to work we got to do the bumper podcast we got to do the uh hanging out with pig and pal show every day which is still happening gotta take the dog for a walk oh man we got to start the car every so often this is we it's just very strange but i have to say and i was talking to someone yesterday a medical professional if you will and what we were talking about was uh and i think i mentioned this before silver lining uh it's great to be able to hang out with my family i love it love it to pieces i make jokes about it about not wanting to hang out with a family but i i actually love it to pieces and um you know it's it's it's nice to be able to be the kid's teacher and to realize that i was completely correct and not going into uh being a teacher like for a job i should not have ever done that i'm glad i did not ever do that it's completely over the top i'm glad i did not ever do that i'm glad i did not see everything's overwhelming you go to the grocery store you're overwhelmed you walk into the cleaning supplies aisle you're underwhelmed you go to the front to pay and you're like how much food are we eating how can how is it possibly this much money every single time what are we what are we doing are we i mean all we're doing is eating is what's happening that's the only way that we've been able to get our brain levels our serotonin levels to uh to be at a nice even keel uh so that we're not overwhelmed and we're not underwhelmed is we just keep eating we might want to make sure that our stomach is completely whelmed i love it um anyway how are you doing are you hanging in there you you doing okay yeah i've been doing zoom comedy shows zoom comedy shows and um actually i have a a meeting with zoom uh at some point they haven't sent me the invitation yet but they said they are because we're gonna want to try to figure out the platform to see how i can make make zoom comedy shows even better because right now it's just uh you know you're just one random person just on video talking to nobody and then uh you know somebody will type in the chat lol and you're like ah that doesn't have the same effect on me and i'm like oh my god i'm on a comedian who's telling jokes uh as actually hearing someone laugh seeing someone type lol no it doesn't it doesn't do it for you you're like oh i guess that one that was a big one i got i got one lol oh wait look i got a uh a sideways laughing partially crying emoji ah i'm tearing it up tonight this is living the dream so i'm trying to see if there's a way to make that better um we do a weekly uh open mic and my friend's coffee joint it's a cedar beans coffee joint in cedar grove new jersey we got that figured out it's a blast it's really fun we're really uh trying to take charge of all this and and and and and fit into the new world right

Unknown: okay see you guys later so you you you you you you

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May 12, 2020
Bumperpodcast #372 – Sick Natty and Football

On today’s Bumperpodcas, Natty has a bit of the sickness, but is joined by one of his favorite children – who asked him to to tell an old story!

The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

About This Episode

In episode 372 of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar sounds different because he's caught a cold after his family passed around various illnesses. Natty and his co-host discuss flu shots, the meaning of words like "lemonade" and "Gatorade," and share funny thoughts about favorite family members. The conversation takes a nostalgic turn as Natty tells the story of his brief high school football career with the St. Pius Golden Lions, including a knee injury that ended his season before it began. The episode features the show's signature improvisational humor, complete with Winnie the Pooh playing football and a memorable tale about being thrown to the ground in his only play as a wide receiver.

Memorable Quotes

“I'm a panther bear… I said a panda… oh a panda bear you are a little panda bear”
— Natty Bumpercar

“When I used to live in Brooklyn, my name was Scribble. Because every time I dribbled I would scribble around the court and I would miss the basket.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“He grabbed me with both hands and picked me up off the ground, and he said, get off me. And he threw me down. That was my football experience.”
— Natty Bumpercar

Topics: #illness #family #football #highschool #sportsinjuries #childhoodmemories #winniethepooh

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: oh hi everybody it's me natty bumper car and this is how I sound now because I got sick and who is who got me sick was it you no are you sure yes interesting because I feel like you might have been sick a couple of weeks ago with a stomach bug but that was a long time ago yeah I know it was probably Ollie he had a oh wait a minute that's right you had a stomach plug blow a stomach plug and then Ollie had the flu and then ever since then I've had a cold yeah did you know though I got tested for the flu I've been tested twice so far and both times no flu me too you didn't get tested yeah no you didn't get tested at all right sure no I'm not sure of anything are you sure question oh a question mark is in the air let's see I'm gonna walk over to that question block and I'm gonna tap it and what comes out of that question block no one knows it's a mystery well well I

Unknown: don't know if I took it I think I did you took what the flu shot oh no you definitely had a flu

Natty Bumpercar: shot oh it hurt yeah now hold on a second you just said you didn't remember if you had it and now you're saying it definitively hurt I don't understand that doesn't

Unknown: make any sense it did happen but I forgot but now you remember yeah I'm a panther bear you're a

Natty Bumpercar: panther bear what's a panther bear I said a panda oh a panda bear you are a little panda bear this you know this is not a uh video podcast this is just an audio podcast do you know what audio means um it doesn't show anything audio is sound oh yeah like sound waves sound waves yeah audio is made up of sound waves what was that did you just did you just take a drink and then you choked a little bit yes oh my what are you drinking today minute made lemonade ew I only drink homemade natural lemonade that's made by lemons did you know that no in Georgia probably in Georgia the only kind of lemonade we drink is made by lemons really no did you know that lemon sorry for the cough did you know that lemonade so it's like if it's two words it's lemon and then it's aid and what aid is help I know it's always what help lemon help it's like gator aid gator help is that crazy yeah yeah and so lemon how do you drink lemon help yes that's awesome and gator help gator which is your favorite gator help so I'm going to drink some help or lemon help both i don't care i can't choose you can't shoot they're both your favorite it's kind of like my children you're both my favorite are you sure i'm positive okay thank you yeah who do you think's my who do you think my iso is my most favorite mommy or popcorn and who do you think is my mostest favorite emerson which is me wait no you're my favorite oh wait you and oliver oh no i'm confused you and oliver my favorite popcorn is my most favorite and mommy

Unknown: is my mostest favoritist why why is popcorn most because she's still just a baby i know you're old

Natty Bumpercar: you're but she's gonna turn seven uh march 31st that's her birthday i know can you believe that yeah we're like we're in she's almost a year old can you yeah she's probably

Unknown: six years old right now. Probably. And then she's going to turn seven.

Natty Bumpercar: So wait, that means she'll be as old as Oliver. Yes, I know. Oh, that's crazy. So there'll be two seven-year-olds in our house.

Unknown: And then next year she'll be 14.

Natty Bumpercar: So she'll, and how old will you be? 11? That's, so she's going to be the, she's going to be

Unknown: the oldest. No, you're not going to

Natty Bumpercar: really care. No, she won't be my mostest, favoritest anymore because she won't be my baby.

Unknown: Ollie will. Ollie will. Oh, that's right. He'll only be eight.

Natty Bumpercar: Yeah, and you'll be 11 and she'll be 14. Yeah. That's kind of bananas. Frank. I don't remember. I didn't call you Frank. Do you remember, do you know your friend Peter? Yeah. So I was talking to him and he had a really interesting concept. He said, um, it was about dog years and, oh, I can't remember it. I can't believe it. But he said something about dog years and then he, um, you know what stinks? I just call, I had to make a phone call because I couldn't remember what he said and then the person that I talked to who I had told it to also couldn't remember. So we have lost an integral part of knowledge. A very special bit of knowledge about dog years and now I'm sad. Are you just going to crunch on ice? Yeah. Is that good? Do you think that's good for your teeth? No. I've heard it's not, but I don't really know. It seems like it's ice. Is it going to hurt them? I don't think it will. Maybe it could. I don't chew ice except for so the ice that you have in your mouth is kind of, it's hard ice, right? No. But it is. But they make this ice that there's like little pellets and they're softer and they're like wonderful to chew on. Like amazing to chew on. That's where you ate today. Did you like it? Yes, it was good. It hurt my stomach. Everything hurts my stomach these days. All I can eat anymore is… It used to.

Unknown: Remember when it always hurt my stomach when I ever eat? Every time you ate anything

Natty Bumpercar: you would say, what would you say? Oh, daddy my tummy hurts.

Unknown: No, my stomach hurts. Oh, my tum-tum. My

Natty Bumpercar: rummy tum-tum hurts. What's that mean? I don't know. I was just making up a silly word. Yeah, I do remember that. And now daddy's tummy hurts every time he eats. Scribble. Scribble. You know what that is? So, Emerson just found a basketball that's in our basement where we record and it's got the word scribble on it because when I used to live in Brooklyn, New York when I went to Pratt Institute I would go and play basketball on the courts and my name was Scribble. Because every time I dribbled I would scribble around the court and I would miss the basket. Really? Yeah, I love basketball but I'm not very good at it. I didn't play it growing up and so I don't have all those skills that you might

Unknown: need to have. You played football growing up and then you

Natty Bumpercar: hurt yourself. No, I played soccer growing up. My whole life I played soccer until I was a sophomore in high school so I was probably 14? 15? 16? No, I was probably 15 and I stopped playing. I didn't make the team so I couldn't play soccer anymore. I know, sad. And then I played senior year I played football. And then he hurt his knee. Knee? Yeah, not my high knee but my knee.

Unknown: And then he almost died. Nope,

Natty Bumpercar: that didn't happen. But what did happen it was before, do you know this story? No. So

Unknown: Oh, you didn't even get to play.

Natty Bumpercar: I didn't. In junior year I was playing in PE we were outside playing flag football and It was flag? Well, no, no, no so we were playing flag football in PE like in, you know how you have gym? Yeah, gym. Yeah, and so we were outside and we were playing it and our PE coach was the football coach for the next year. He was new. And he came up to me and he had a real southern accent. He said, son, you ever played football before? Like that. And I was just like no? Because I was really skinny and I was really small but I was really fast. And I was like, no, I never played football. Why would I do that? And he's like, next year you're gonna play on the varsity team. Like that. And I was like, okay. And so then I had to start going to practice and practice for high school football was like five, six times a week. It was all the time. The school bought my equipment, like my pads and my helmet, everything. They bought it for me. And then there were football camps over the summer.

Unknown: Wait, do you still have the stuff around?

Natty Bumpercar: No, it was so long ago. I don't have any of it. Sad. I know.

Unknown: Did it have the Georgia sign?

Natty Bumpercar: No, that was before I went to Georgia. This was in high school.

Unknown: Oh, what did it look like?

Natty Bumpercar: It was blue and gold and it was I went to a place called St. Pius and we were the St. Pius, I don't even remember, Golden Lions. We were the Golden Lions. The Golden Lions. And and so

Unknown: Wendy the Pooh played.

Natty Bumpercar: Wendy the Pooh played, yeah. And it's hot. And honey broke. And Eeyore, his honey broke? Yeah, and Eeyore's tail fell off. Oh, that's so sad. Did they lose the game? Yeah, but

Unknown: Eeyore's tail always falls off. Why does it

Natty Bumpercar: always fall off? I don't know. It feels like they should find a solution for that. And Tigger. Yeah, Tigger's just jumping around. What does he say? And then they got tackled hard. Wonderful thing about Tiggers is Tiggers are wonderful things. Their tops are made out of rubber and their bottoms are made out of springs. They're bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, bouncy, fun, fun, fun, fun, fun. But the most wonderful thing about Tiggers is I ain't the only one. Oh, I'm the only one.

Unknown: Um, wait, no. He got tackled and got a concussion. Who did?

Natty Bumpercar: Tigger? Tigger. Oh, no. So did the doctors take care of him? No. No? Was Piglet? He wasn't on the field, was he? He's too tiny.

Unknown: He juked everyone out. Really?

Natty Bumpercar: Yes. What about Kanga and Roo? Did they play? No. Kanga was watching and Roo was rooting? Yeah. And Owl?

Unknown: Um, we don't want to talk about that. Oh,

Natty Bumpercar: something awful happened to Owl. So do you know what happened? So I went through we had summer practice. Yeah. And then we had something called two-a-days. And two-a-days are where you have a practice in the morning and then another practice in the afternoon. Wow. So you're practicing for like six hours, eight hours a day. And this is two weeks before school starts. You're at school every day. Eight hours. Boom. Practice, practice, practice, practice, practice, practice, practice. Because they want you to be ready for the season. And that's in rain. That's in hot. It's everything. And I in the first week I ran straight and then I cut to my right and then I went back to the left. And when I did that, my knee went kablumble. Like that. It went kablumble. And I was like, ow, that hurts. But I was young and I was kind of I didn't know. And I was just like, well, I hurt my knee, but I still played on it for a day or two. And then the team doctor came and I said, hey, my knee feels funny. And he did this little test. And he was like, oh, no. Oh, no. Did your knee go kablumble? And I was like, it did go kablumble. And so then I had to go. They took me to a hospital. And I had to get an MRI. Which, you know, the CAT scan that you were going to get? I hated it. So it's like that. But it was for my knee. So I didn't have to. My head didn't have to go in. But it was like this. It was kind of like a super x-ray is what we'll call it. MRI stands for, I think, magnetic resonance imaging. And it's so scary. But then they found out that my knee was busted. And so they did surgery on it. Orthoscopic. Where they put tiny, tiny, tiny little things in my knee and tried

Unknown: to fix it. Nothing happened. It didn't work.

Natty Bumpercar: No, it did not. And then I went to physical therapy and I was on crutches for the whole season. And so I'd get to go to pep rallies. Do you know what a pep rally is? No. So a pep rally is like when all the students gather around in one room and they cheer on the team. Where they're like, Go Golden Lions! And I was out in the middle of the floor like, Yeah, I'm a Golden Lion. Look at me. And then the last game of the season, the coach asked me, he wanted me to dress up in uniform. Dress out. Get in uniform. I was like, okay. And I was standing on the sideline. And then with just, I mean, like 20 seconds to go in the game, he goes, Bump a car. Get in there. And I was like, what? Do what? He was like, get in the game. And I was like, oh no, no. What? Because I didn't know what to do. So I went in the huddle. We were on offense. I was a wide receiver. And I was terrified. And I said to the quarterback, I was like, I don't know what to do. I don't know where to stand. I don't know anything. He's like, just go over there. Stand. When I say hut, run. I was like, I can do that. I know how to do that. So he goes, hut, hut, hut. And he gets the ball. And I run. And as a wide receiver, you're the guy who catches the ball. And there's a guy called a defensive back. And he's the one who tries to stop you from catching the ball. And so, I was supposed to run out, bounce off that guy, and then cut to the inside. That was my plan. But when I went, I bounced to bounce off of him. He grabbed me with both hands and picked me up off the ground, because he was a really big guy. And then he said, get off me. And he threw me down. And then the time of the clock ran off. And the referee whistle went, like that. And the game was over. That was my football experience. Who lost? Oh, we lost by a lot.

Unknown: No, they cheated.

Natty Bumpercar: No, they didn't cheat. They just were better than us.

Unknown: Why did they say, get off me?

Natty Bumpercar: Uh, I don't know. I think he didn't like that I bounced off of him. But that's what I thought I was supposed to do. That's what I did.

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March 6, 2020
Bumperpodcast #367 – Time is a flat circle

Natty starts talking about time, and baubles, and then gets a bit nostalgic, and also a bit flustered. It’s almost like deja vu!

The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

About This Episode

In episode 367 of the Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar reflects on post-holiday blues and the passage of time after all the festive decorations come down. Host Natty explores deep concepts like "time is a flat circle" and nostalgia, sharing humorous stories about conflating memories of family dogs Popcorn and Irving Brown Socks. The episode takes listeners through Natty's personal experiences with déjà vu, cave crickets in a Georgia crawl space, and his children's nostalgia for "the good old days" at the brown house. Natty wraps up with motivational thoughts about using time wisely and the mysterious Tree Wolf who takes away Christmas trees each year, leaving pine needles everywhere.

Memorable Quotes

“Did you know in school in my yearbook I was labeled the one who likes fancy doodads the most? My middle name is sparkly doodad bumper car. It's not but…”
— Natty Bumpercar

“The tree wolf comes out of the forest and he takes our tree and he drags it back into the forest. The tree wolf is not a clean wolf, he's a dirty wolf.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“Time is a flat circle and time is not linear. Your memories, the older you get they all build up and sometimes they start to get a little bit combined.”
— Natty Bumpercar

Topics: #time #nostalgia #post-holiday #memories #philosophy #family #dogs #motivation

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: oh woe is me woe is me woe is me it is that time of year when all of the beautiful sparkly baubles go away the lights the trees the ornaments all the fancy doodads and it makes me so sad because i love fancy doodads why did you know in school in my yearbook i was labeled the one who likes fancy doodads the most did you know that my middle name is sparkly doodad bumper car it's not but guys it's it's hard because we just went through all the big holidays you had your thanksgivings you had all this stuff in december we had new year's and now we're just in june january oh january it's this cold month that's just here and it's fine it's good i'm not gonna knock january why one of my sweet beautiful children was born in january but it's it's it's it's not the best month because i mean what do i yeah all the fun stuff just to happen now we gotta wait we gotta wait for what's the next thing valentine's day all right did you know i was at the grocery store the other day and uh they were taking all the christmas stuff down so this was december 26th and they were putting the valentine's day stuff up in december and i was just like no grocery store i will not buy your heart-shaped candies yet not until february 12th in a rush a mad rush that's when i get my cards and whatnot you know here's the thing it made me think of time and and i read i there was a cool uh little not slogan little saying call it says time is a flat circle and i was like what does that mean what is a flat what does that mean like a flat circle i guess if it was a 3d circle it would be a ball but time is a flat circle and so it was just kind of like the things that you have done will come back around and you'll do them again and again and again throughout your entire life i don't and i don't know really what the point of it is i guess it's just to say to pay attention you know also time is not linear what does linear mean it means like a straight line so time can fold back on you on itself and i know that doesn't make any sense but time is weird if you think about it you know you're born you live you do your life and then you're in you go away i guess i don't know i don't know what happens i haven't been there yet but you have memories and you have nostalgia and what that is is when the holidays come and maybe you smell a candle that smells like a tree and then you have another time that you smelled a candle that smelled like a tree and the time kind of folds in on itself and your memories and the older you get your memories they all build up right and so sometimes they start to get a little bit combined um especially my brain loves to conflate things what does conflate mean it means to just kind of squish things together a little bit sometimes unintended it's like how i uh you know i'll look at our dog popcorn who's uh 10 months old beagle black lab maybe you've met her i hope you have and uh just seeing her uh the way she'll run in the backyard sometimes will uh make me have little flashbacks to memories of irving brown socks my my puppy dog uh and then i start to think about things that socks did but things that popcorn did and then i can't remember which of the dogs actually did that thing and then i start to conflate them and then i just put them in the uh dog folder in my brain i'm like well that's a dog activity i'm just gonna put it in the dog box this is where the memories of dog things go and sometimes if it gets jostled or shaken up or moved around i'm just gonna put it in the dog box and then i start to think about then uh you know maybe one of the two of the thoughts will get a little confused um now that's a funny thing because it can get confusing have you ever had deja vu do you know what that is deja vu is super cool that's when you're doing something and then you kind of your brain goes wait a minute haven't i been here before haven't i done this thing before already wasn't i already in this exact spot or you know somebody will say to you like uh uh oh i'll have a fruit smoothie and you're like yeah you will how did i know you were gonna say that i feel like i've been in this very moment already and i don't know what deja vu is is it just your mind working quicker than the world around it is it just you know maybe you were kind of not focused not paying attention and then you come back to the world and it's kind of overwhelming and your brain is just like ah this is that okay here we are and this is what's happening i don't know is it is it uh shadows of whispers of memories of of things that are happening i don't know i don't know we're not learning i mean we're learning all kinds of fun stuff what we learned so far time is a flat circle time is not linear the one i just said deja vu that one conflation that was a big one to learn today um but so the older you get it's it's it's fun even my kids they uh you know 10 and 7 they they they will get nostalgic for things in their past i mean emerson's only 10 years old but he'll be like oh i remember the good old days remember the good old days i'm like what is the good old what does that mean to you what are the good old days you're 10 years old all your days have been pretty good what are the what are the good old days he's like ah the good old days where we lived in the brown house i'm like ah yes the brown house uh emerson has a a few touchstones uh that he likes to his memories go back to they flow back to and the brown house is one of them remember the brown house dad and i'm like yeah you were four how do you like what kind of foundational memories were you making at the brown house i remember the brown house was cold i remember the brown house was uh uh dark and it had um those cave crickets in the basement what are cave crickets they're horrifying monstrous little bugs that have these four legs and when they bounce they go boom like that and they're aggressive they'll come at you they're not bugs that are like i'm gonna scurry away i don't want to see people no they're bugs that are like like hey hey hey you hey hey you're like no no thank you i don't want no thank you please no go away bug not a fan not a fan when we used to live in georgia this was pre-children uh i had to do a lot of work under our house we had a crawl space a crawl space is a space under a house uh it's usually like three i think ours is maybe two and a half three feet so not not not a lot dirt you know it's the the ground is under the house dirt yucky dirt dirt dirt dirt and i had to go under there and clean out the whole space take everything that was out in there out and then i put in uh a new uh i put stuff called lime which is just some stuff you put in the dirt i don't know it changes the ph what does that mean i don't know so i was told to do and then i had to put this new liner on the ground to keep the moisture from the ground away from the house and as i'm doing all this work by myself in the dark these crickets would come at me constantly like boing boing boing what are you doing boing what are you doing boing what are you doing boing and i was just like please leave me alone i couldn't even sit up in there so i'd have to roll away from them and they would follow me and they were faster at hopping than i was at rolling and it was just not pleasant it was just not pleasant at all i'm hoping that that is not something if time is in fact a flat circle that is going to come around to me again and again i don't want to have any more confrontation i don't want to have any more confrontation i don't with cave crickets don't want to at all back to the point and time use it preciously use it wisely don't dawdle get as much stuff done as you can don't overextend yourself because if you do you might get sick and i don't want you to get tired okay i want you to live to your potential with and use your time as best you can and i don't want you to get tired okay i want you to live to your best as you can make yourself happy do good things for yourself do good things for other people use your time wisely right right this has become a motivational speech and i'm fine with that time is not infinite your your your time is finite finite finite finite infinite finite finite no finite uh what does that mean that means there's a beginning and there's an end so use all the time that you have as best as you can and and it'll be great it'll be great even if you have to rest a little bit that's still using your time just be cognizant be aware that you're using your time it'll be good it'll be good i uh i was reading all these quotes like famous people quotes and it was just they were all basically like um you know what was it uh this is uh charles darwin said a man who dares to waste one hour of life has not discovered the value of life okay so don't waste your time charles we got it charles darwin one day you should look him up he's cool he went to the galapagos islands there were turtles there there's more to them but that's that's that's just the high notes we're just hitting the high notes guy named uh let's see thomas jefferson you ever heard of him he's a big name says determined never to be idle no person will have occasion to complain of the want of time who never loses any it is wonderful how much can be done if we are always doing so just do stuff i mean these guys are much wordier than i am i'm basically like uh you should do some stuff maybe you should do some stuff like i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know like that but um anyway guys you know what i'm gonna go be nostalgic about my my my baubles my tree my christmas lights i'm gonna go uh clean up the glitter that fell on the ground as i was moving things oh and i'm gonna tell you one one more quick story so in our house here at headquarters every year the uh when it's time to take the tree down we take we have to take everything off the tree we take all the ornaments we take the lights off and uh then the tree wolf comes out of the forest and he takes our tree and he drags it back into the forest and i don't know what happens after that do you guys have a tree wolf where does your tree go how did who how does your tree leave the house my kids they some of them they were like dad you take the tree out and i was just like that's not even possible i can't pick this tree up it's too big doesn't even fit through the door the tree wolf does it and the worst thing about the tree wolf is that when he drags the tree out of the house he leaves all the needles everywhere the tree wolf is not a clean wolf he's a dirty wolf but anyway collecting trees for all these years out in the forest out in the woods i don't know what his plan is i don't know what his angle is but i know the tree wolf means business and i do too and you do too you know why because you're the bumper podcast cateers and it's a new year new year what does that mean we're getting stickers made pretty soon i'll tell you how you can get a sticker so just keep listening keep being awesome i love you you're my best friend all right

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January 16, 2020
Bumperpodcast #366 – Decade Review

Natty invites all of his favorite guests over to talk about their favorite moments from the last decade. It’s a magical journey of reminiscing!

The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

About This Episode

In this special decade-ending episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar celebrates the last show of 2019 and the entire 2010s by inviting characters to share their favorite memories from the past ten years. The episode features appearances from quirky characters including Bargle, Cousin, Heos, Frenchie, and Ullman, who share humorous and touching stories ranging from community kudzu dinners to lactose intolerance discoveries. Regular cast members Aloysius J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, and Doodle Poodle also join to reflect on their decade. The episode concludes with a heartwarming surprise appearance from Natty's real-life children, Ollie and Emmy, who share what they're thankful for as the show wraps up a decade of puppet comedy.

Memorable Quotes

“You got to live your life. You got to live your life, man. You got to live your life. Because otherwise, you're not going to live.”
— Frenchie

“You got to be present. You got to be aware of the world around you. You got to live in it. Otherwise, what are you doing? You're here for a certain amount of time.”
— Natty Bumpercar

“You're bringing in all these random characters. Who's Frenchie? Who's Bargle? They ain't never been on the show. It don't make no sense, man.”
— Aloysius J. Pig

Topics: #nostalgia #newyear #reflection #friendship #family #decaderetrospective #gratitude

Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Ollie (Natty's son), Emmy (Natty's daughter)

Full Transcript

Natty Bumpercar: well well well hello there bumper podcast it's me natty bumper car and this is the last show not just of 2019 but of the entire decade 10 years of bumper podcasts why i remember when you were just a tiny bumper podcast and now look at you all grown up and big i'm so proud of you um so what i thought would be a fun idea for this episode would be if we um reminisce a little bit if we you know got some of the our pals that are on the show and had them in and kind of you know just reminisce and and and and thought about fun things that happened like maybe their favorite things so without further ado uh i'm gonna bring in our first guest so uh um take it away i guess oh look at that production we have a cool noise hey so um go ahead bargle what's what's what's your yes biggest memory i like it i like it i like it wow really i don't remember that well i'm so glad that you decided to come in and share that i'm not you know what i'm impressed because a lot of people don't put themselves out on podcasts or in friendships or relationships like you just did bargle so i'm i hey i'm glad we made it through the last decade and i can't wait to see what we do next decade cool cool cool well i mean that's gonna be hard to uh to top i mean it's not a competition but let's bring in our next guest to see what what how his decade was and what his favorite memory was well i remember when i was just a knee-high tadpole growing up in the kudzu wood thatту behind my house because i wasn't allowed in the house necessarily and all the kudzu creatures kept me company and one day we were supposed to be having a community kudzu dinner and we couldn't afford none of the food and so what we did was to um we all gathered our resources and we had a talent show and everybody came out from the hills to the valleys and we earned enough money that we all got to share a chestnut which was roasted on an open fire and just made everybody's dicky. That was my favorite moment of them all. That's wonderful. Thanks for having me, Natty. Absolutely, cousin. I'm so glad you could be here. Wow, this is really working out better than I ever would have expected. What great stories we're getting. I mean, they came together as a community. I'm so happy right now. I'm going to keep going because I feel like we're doing amazingly and I don't want to stop. Let's see, who's coming up? Oh, it's Heos. What's going on, Heos? Your name? Your name always cracks me up. I love it when you come on this show. Oh, really? That happened? And was she okay? Oh, thank goodness. I got worried. It turns out funny in the end. Yeah. That's tremendous. Man. Oh, really? Yes. Well, I didn't expect that. It's a real twist. Yes. Ah, thanks, Heos. It's great. Wow. I mean, it's like story after story after story. It's… I feel like everybody's had a pretty great decade. I guess we'll keep going. I don't know. Play the noise, producer. Right. So, I didn't know. I'm just… There. I almost went out of tune. I didn't want to have one of those. You don't. Because I was like, who wants to have breakfast and some lunch? That's too much. I don't believe it's proper. Yeah. And so, what I'm thinking is like, I'm going to go to Antibody. I'm going to have a spotter. You know, just a copper. And I'm going to just take it in and look around a bit. You guys do that sometimes. And so, my last decade, I was like, whoa, I just… Oh, other place. Yeah. And I was like, did you know? I didn't. I didn't know. How could you? And I had to really do to write a book. I did some research. And I did a walkabout. And I was just like, I think this is wonderful. This whole world is just such a big place. Yeah, it's huge. And I was like, look at this. You know, so it's like eye-opening. I was like, oh. I had no idea. I was just going to be like, experience. Everything. And I was just like, oh, stop. Oh. And so, I wanted to tell you that. And I was like, ugh. Yeah. And then, I didn't know. But I was like, really into it. And I was like, oh, man. There's a lot. And so, I didn't tell you. But I wanted to tell everybody about it. It's like, got to get out of there. You got to do your own stuff. All right? Because otherwise, you're not going to live. You got to live your life. Yeah, you got to live your life. You got to live your life, man. You got to live your life. All right. I agree. That's all I got. That's the best. Hey, you're the best, man. No, Frenchie. Listen. I think you hit the nail on the head there. You went out there. You weren't just going to sit around. And you lived your life. And you experienced the world. And it was an eye-opening experience. And I think that's what you have to do in life. I always talk about it on the podcast. But you got to be present. You got to be aware of the world around you. You got to live in it. Right? Otherwise, what are you doing? Like, you're here for a certain amount of time. And you got to, really, you got to keep your eyes open. Keep your ears open. Interact with people. Hear their stories. Get their perspectives. And you may not always agree with it. You may not even like it. But I think it's important to stay aware. Right? Of what's happening around you. This is, I think, my favorite episode that we've ever done. Let's see. I think we've got one more. And then we've got a couple surprise guests coming in. But let's see how your, what your favorite moment of the last decade was. Ullman, get up here. Well, I don't really appreciate it that you say this is my last decade. No, no, no. Because I've been here for much longer. No, not your last decade. The last. The. Excuse me. The. I didn't know what you meant by that. No, yeah, the last decade. My choice is the last decade. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, sorry. Not my last decade. No, no. No. That's a, that's a bit of nomic. I understand now. Okay, good, good, good. Sorry about that. Let me research. My favorite moment of the last decade, I believe, was I fell in love with a beautiful sunset What? What? Named. Named. Sunrise and the clouds and the skies and the butterflies and people saying why, why and all such things as that. And I chose to live that life with sunrise and sunset and the butterflies. You're still rhyming. And also I found out that I'm allergic. To what? What are you allergic to? To milk. Like lactose? Lactose? Lactose. Lactose intolerance. Okay. Lactose intolerance. That was my favorite moment. Oh, no. Because I couldn't eat ice cream anymore. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's my least favorite moment. I couldn't eat ice cream anymore. I'm sorry. And so what I started doing was just buying it by the tub and putting it in my freezer. But why? I currently have 16 freezers in my house full of ice cream that I can't even eat. That's so many freezers. Which is fine. Yeah, it's okay. You know. Yeah, I'm sorry. Yeah. Yeah. I don't remember what the question was at this point, but I feel like I should have You answered it appropriately. Yes. Thoroughly. You did very well. Willingly. Yes. And entirely. Okay, great. I thank you so much. I'm going to go stir my ice cream now. Okay, Ullman. And not eat it. No, Ullman. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. Oh, we had so many nice stories, and then we had kind of a sad story at the end. Oh. I guess maybe Ullman can pick it up by having a big ice cream party, and everybody can come and sample some of the 16 freezers full of ice cream that are in his house. Oh, man. I got a little sad. Hey, man. Uh-oh. Yeah, I got a problem. What? A real problem right now. Who? Yeah, it's me, Pig. I don't understand. So listen. You had your big year in show, your big decade in show. You're bringing in all these random characters. Who's Frenchie? Who's Bargle? Who's Cousin? I don't know none of these people. They ain't never been on the show. And you're wrapping up the entire decade with all these people who ain't ever even been on the show never once before. It don't make no sense, man. It makes perfect sense. Come on. Aloysius J. Pig, I'm your co-host. I'm on the show all the time. You are, but… I don't even understand. No, Natty. None of this makes… It doesn't make no sense contractually. You have not even put these people… You haven't given them key cards. You haven't put them on the registrar. You haven't even given them cubbies in the locker rooms here at headquarters. You don't need cubbies. I don't believe that they should be featured on the Bumper Podcast 2020 year-end, decade-ending, wrap-up episode, last one of the season of the year. I do fear, however, that you are… Perhaps a little loop-de-loop, and maybe that's what's happening. I am not loop-de-loop in the least. Fine. If you guys want to give your big last decade memories, then I guess we can do that. Aloysius, you go first. Yeah, great. So here I am, chopped liver, stuck on the end. I guess this is my least favorite. I'm going to be like that old dude who… Old man, fine. But I don't even know what to say. I guess I'm happy. I wake up in a warm bed of hay every day. I get food. That makes me happy. I have my friends. Some of my friends are not as nice to me today as they were yesterday. Don't know what's going on with that. But overall, I'd say it's a great decade. I was basically, you know, born into the industry in the last decade. So I see a bright future. I do, too. I'm sorry. Please, come on. Okay, we're good. Get it together. Get it together. Get it, get it, get it, get it. I, myself, have had a phenomenal decade. That's good. I've moved over to e-science. I don't have to have as many documents in my bag. Okay. I can just look at my literature on my tablet. Okay. And I can understand that it's all there. And people just put it in their phones. That's cool. It's not much, but it's really helped me out tremendously. Well, that's good, Rufus. I don't have to go to the library to use a fax machine anymore. Okay. My litigious career is over the top, over the roof. That's good. I think we have a couple more. Let's bring Doodle Poodle. Please come here and tell us how your decade was. Also, I made a lot of doodles. So for the last year, I learned how to sharpen a pencil. And I even learned how to make watercolor doodles. So I had a fun time. I always have a fun time. I like being a dog. Thanks, Doodle Poodle. All right. Now I feel a little bit better. We did have a lot of new characters. I don't really know what I was doing. But I had an amazing decade with you guys. The 2010s were pretty swell. And I really hope the world gets to be a better place and more inclusive and nicer to everybody. And, you know, I like progress. I like things moving forward. That makes me happy. You know, I feel like we have a lot of work to do. And I feel like, you know, just if you talk to people, smile at people, acknowledge people, because everyone's going through stuff. And you don't know what they're going through. So if you're at a restaurant and maybe your water doesn't get there fast enough, it's okay. Your water's going to get there. And, you know, it's… Just relax, everybody. It's going to be okay. All right? All right. Happy New Year to you and all of yours. And the Bumper Podcast will be back in 2020 with all kinds of fun episodes. I'm assuming… I'm hoping that you'll be there with me. Share it with your friends. Rate it on whatever you listen to. And give yourself… Give yourself a hug. You deserve it. Or at least a high five. Whatever you want. It's fine. Wait, wait, Daddy. Oh, hey, guys. Did I forget you? Yeah. Oh, I can't believe it. I'm so sorry. Hi.

Unknown: Hi.

Natty Bumpercar: You know what I forgot to say my favorite part of the last decade was? Everything. You guys.

Unknown: Oh. Oh, yeah.

Ollie (Natty's son): I liked everything.

Natty Bumpercar: You liked every single thing?

Ollie (Natty's son): Yep.

Natty Bumpercar: I don't know if that's true.

Ollie (Natty's son): I liked when we went to Atlanta.

Natty Bumpercar: You liked when we went to Atlanta?

Ollie (Natty's son): Yeah. Oh.

Natty Bumpercar: Oh, that's sweet. What about you?

Ollie (Natty's son): I liked everything.

Natty Bumpercar: Every single thing? Yep. Even when Popcorn was a puppy?

Emmy (Natty's daughter): Yep.

Natty Bumpercar: Wow. So, Emmy, you were born in 2009. Well, we don't have to give all that out, but yes. So, here's the cool thing. So, you have now, as of two days from now, been alive in three different decades. Yep. The 0s. Both. The 10s. And the 20s. The 20s. So, three decades is 30 years, but you're only 10 years old. Is that crazy?

Emmy (Natty's daughter): Yeah, 20 years now.

Natty Bumpercar: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, Ollie, you were born in 20 what? 13. 13? Are you sure? Yeah. That doesn't make any sense to me.

Emmy (Natty's daughter): He's only been one decade from now.

Natty Bumpercar: He's, for right now, it's one decade, but in two days, it'll be two decades. Woo. And I've been alive in 800 decades. No. Because I'm eternal.

Unknown: No, you're not.

Natty Bumpercar: Dad. That's yelling. Why are you yelling at the microphone? I don't know. Yeah, you don't know, do you? Well, so, real quick. What are you thankful for from the last decade? Don't say everything.

Ollie (Natty's son): The Easter Bunny thing.

Natty Bumpercar: The Easter Bunny thing? Okay.

Emmy (Natty's daughter): It's Christmas.

Natty Bumpercar: You're thankful for Christmas and the Easter Bunny and your family?

Emmy (Natty's daughter): Yes. I'm thankful for the one when we got our dog, and I'm thankful for the one Kalahari.

Natty Bumpercar: Oh. So, your trips we took with your friends.

Emmy (Natty's daughter): And Atlanta.

Natty Bumpercar: Wonderful.

Ollie (Natty's son): Well, guys, Happy New Year. You too, Dad. Happy New Year.

Natty Bumpercar: I love you guys.

Ollie (Natty's son): I love you too, Daddy.

Natty Bumpercar: Let's see. I love you guys more than beans love rice, more than cheese loves mice, more than…

Ollie (Natty's son): A billion, kajillion dollars.

Natty Bumpercar: Oh, that's right. More than a bajillion, kajillion dollars.

Ollie (Natty's son): I love you more than anything. Me too. I love you. Oh, geese. Oh.

Natty Bumpercar: Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

Unknown: Good job, guys.

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December 30, 2019