Author: natty bumpercar

  • Bumperpodcast #359 – Chillin’ with Brody

    Bumperpodcast #359 – Chillin’ with Brody

    It has been awhile since we recorded – as Natty had some serious throat going on … But, we’re back – and Natty runs into someone new. Someone ridiculously interesting? Get yourself ready!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com, or to call in and leave a message – 646.847.7976. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this hilarious episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar returns to his studio only to discover a surfer-bro podcaster named Brody recording his own show, "Chilling with the Bros." Natty learns that Aloysious J. Pig has been renting out the studio to other podcasters to keep the lights on. The situation gets even more chaotic when Rufus T. Rufus appears, still managing the studio's paperwork despite previous attempts to steal Natty's podcast. Brody shares wisdom from his various podcast episodes covering everything from banana storage to personal space, while trying to launch his own podcast network called BroNation. The episode explores themes of entrepreneurship, unexpected houseguests, and the surprisingly deep philosophy of bro culture.

    Memorable Quotes

    “Time is like a bow that wraps around the boxes of your life with all your memories and all your whatnot.”

    — Brody

    “It's stardust. The universe was formed, and straight up from that, you were formed as well. It's the ultimate dichotomy.”

    — Brody

    “I'm glad I ran into you in my own headquarters, Brody.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #podcasting #entrepreneurship #business #studiorental #broculture #self-help #confusion

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: Yum Yum! So it's you know it's like in the summer and so I'm like we should do a recap of like all the cool adventures we had and just like where we went and what we did and just like some killer waves and like all the food we ate and you know just like put everything into a nice box and then wrap it up into a bow and like just put it into the time capsule because time is not linear. Time is like a bow that wraps around the boxes of your life with all your memories and all your whatnot. Hey bro what's going on? Hey not much um who who are you? Man my name is Brody. Okay yeah what are you doing here? I'm doing my podcast. I'm dealing with the bros because you can't spell bro without Brody. Brody without bro you know and it's like a podcast that I do for all my bros where I tell them everything that's been going on man and all the cool things that they should be into and what they should not be into as well unless they so choose. Okay. Obviously. Obviously. I'm sorry. Um cool. It's really nice to meet you and I apologize if I seem confused. I just don't know what you're doing in my house. Bro. This is supposed to be where I record my podcast. I'm sorry uh Natty. Hi everybody. It's me. Hello. Hey pig. That is Brody. He's recording his podcast. We rent the studio out every so often so that other people can come in and put you know do the production work. We do the podcast. Right. Okay. We do the editing. We do all the all the stuff. We rent it? People ain't normally want to go for the podcast and Brody you can see on this piece of paper on the wall. Oh. That's my name. Brody. Brody's it? He's he's chilling with the bros because you can't spell Brody without your bro you know but so I it's what I record here. I pay money. I hope you don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't. I don't want to do it. I don't want to kick me out. Oh no. I just. My listenerships all my bros and and bro that. So appreciate it one day man. No man. We we are not gonna kick you out. Don't worry. You almost got me talking in your style. Uh Brody why don't you uh so Natty this is how we pay for things. This is how we keep the lights on. This is how we have ice pops in the freezer. This is how you know we do it. We we we keep the lights on. It's right. We keep the air conditioning on. We keep the uh the the uh the clothes I don't know. We keep bananas in the fridge. Whatever we do. This is one of the ways we do it, okay? You guys got bananas in your fridge, bro? I think that causes them to oxygenate and brown quicker. I think what you should do, according to episode 47, Bananas in Our Mist, that you're supposed to hang those nanners off of a hook where they're not touching nothing, and then they're going to keep for a lot longer, bro. Wait, I feel like I just learned something from you, Brody. This podcast is actually much more educational than you ever would have anticipated, if I'm to be honest. Yeah, man, so we haven't been picked up yet, but we're in discussions and talks to get on some serious podcast networks because the stuff that we're pumping out, people want to listen to, and they're like, I want to know how to be a bro, or even if they don't want to be a bro, they just want to know how to live like a bro or a bro. I'm very inclusive, so I'm just like, you know, finances, episode 32. Okay. Scratch them pennies, okay? You should listen to that one. Podcasting 101. That was episode 101, all right? Wow. And that's just telling anybody, how they can get in on the game, okay? My voice doesn't have to be the only voice out there. Yeah. Like, I want everybody to, what? Uh, yeah, excuse me there, son. Uh, I hope you is not tracking sand into my studio. Uh, oh, hey, well, the natty bumper car, it's me, Rufus, T. Rufus. I don't want you here, Rufus. You're not, you kicked me. Oh, now we haven't gotten over all of that yet. No, you tried to steal my podcast, and you tried to steal everything. E pluribus hunum. E pluribus hunum, that's what it was. What are you doing here? Hey, natty, natty, natty, natty, relax, back up. Don't forget, he's a man of the law, all right? So he's, don't touch, don't even get in his personal space. Man, episode 71 was about personal space, and did you know that, like, if you hold your arms out and spin in a circle, like, that's yours, man. That's your land, and know that he can take it from you, and nobody owns it at that moment other than you and your eternal flame, right? Yes, so that's what I guess I'm here to talk about, to discuss, natty. The reason I am here is I am still the protractor-nator of all of the logistical paperwork for this whole environment, this whole studio, this whole platform, if you will, and this young gentleman here, this Baro, Brody, I believe, he has some miscalculations, misappropriations, misstatements, if you will, on his ledger, on his documentation. Okay, that's, how in the world are you still managing everything if you tried to kick us out? That doesn't make any sense to me. Like, you tried to get everyone out of the studio, you tried to take my podcast away from me because you said I was being a loop-de-loop. You just like loop-de-loops on? Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Right. Well? No, I'm not saying I'm that now. Okay. But I'm saying that's what you did and we still trust you, why? Well, now it all comes down to documentation and well, we have a con-tract, and it is unbreakable, unbondable, undeniable. And in this contract, it states heretofore that I, 324, shall not 567 ever be, uh, terminated if you understand. So I am here, I am illog, and I am here to am in a charge and i will be handling your business moving forward sir man natty i feel like you should totally listen to episode 12 i don't 12 12 12 a we had a missed number so it's 12 a but it's um all about it says uh contact your contract and what it's all about is reading over your your you want to get in contact with yourself you for what you want your contract to be and where it should go does that make sense that's don't forget everybody on chilling with the bros with me your host brody okay uh i feel like i should start subscribing to your podcast pig i want to talk to you quick sidebar no you said sad but that's a legal language so should i be involved no you actually shouldn't i need you could you just leave the room and you know what we'll have our people contact your people you don't have to be so hands-on i would appreciate if from now on we just mail back and forth that's acceptable do you do email of course i do i do whatever i i pone express i i will uh i have a line line line i have a pager i have every form of communications that this natural technology and technological world have provided to everyone so sir i will see you when i see you if you understand what i'm saying and that's why it's an i emoji will see the letter c u the letter u win and that looks like a little clock i again another i c the letter c you that's how advanced i am i can cut language down left and right so to make Time go faster. Time is going so fast these days. Let me tell you about my children. No, you're out. You're done. He has kids. That's the first I've ever heard of that. Yeah. Known the guy for like 15 years. Okay. So, Pig, I just want to get a couple of things straight. So, anyone can come here and record at any time? Yeah, there's a sign-up sheet. They put the name on it. They play. Okay. And then they come in. And how do they schedule it? And they're in the house? Yeah, they're in the studio headquarters. Headquarters? Yeah, headquarters. Okay, I forgot. You're fine. Okay, I forgot we called it that. It's a little weird, but fine. No, you're fine. You're fine. Listen, so it's a lot of things you're going to pick up on. I know your memory, your brain is a little bit flustered still, but you're doing much better. So, yeah, anybody can come in. They schedule it. They come in. They record. We do the thing, and then they do the stuff, and then it's up there in the cloud, wherever it goes, and then they listen. Yeah, man. My listenership, it's spiking. People listening to this? Like, it's going through the roof, dude. Okay. Like, bro. We did this one episode where a bunch of comedians got together, and they listened to other comedians' sets, right? Okay. And it was, like, comedians listening or something, right? Okay, that's a good concept. It was episode. But we might make a whole other podcast. That's the beauty of Podcast Nation, is you can just record stuff, put your mind in there, put your heart and soul in. You get that? And when you gain an audience, man, you can splinter. Pretty soon this time next year, maybe, I'm going to have my whole platform. Like, it's all going to be just me and all my different podcasts. So it's going to be like Brody Nation. Bro Nation, right? And so you should totally, if you want to hook up, I don't know if you do any kind of podcasting. You have this sweet studio, so maybe you should. Cool. Thank you. Did you just offer me a spot on your podcast platform? Because it's the Bumper Podcast. That's why we're all here. That's why the studio is here in headquarters. Pig helps out. Rufus, I don't want to say his name too often because he'll just show up. But, yeah, I would be honored, I guess, because you seem like you know what you're doing. Very versed in a lot of different subjects. So I'm kind of more, I'm beyond impressed. So thanks. Thanks for, I'm glad I ran into you in my own headquarters, Brody. So, cool. Hey, everybody. You know, I'm Natty Bumpercar. And as I'm really starting to learn, I've got a lot to learn about podcasting, about what goes on in my own house, and all the different people that show up in my house. And, yeah, I'm kind of still a little bit freaked out about all of this. But, man, I'm telling you, there's no reason to be freaked out. The universe is inside of you and around you. And what you want to do is, like, just get in touch with your chakras. Like, look into a mirror in a dark room, and all you're going to see isn't just the darkness. What you're going to see is what's inside of you, man. And it's what's inside of me. Okay. You know what that is, bro? No, I don't, and I'm terrified to find out. But, hey, we're here. Why not? I'll take a guess. Is it, like, oxygen or H2O? Corpuscles? No, man. Blood? I don't know. What is it? I want to find out. Yeah, man. So, it's even inside of you, little Al. It's stardust. Am I right? The universe was formed, and straight up from that, you were formed as well. As was I. As was everything around us. So, at any time you're breathing in, it's just the universe, and it's holding you together, and it's forcing you apart at the same time. It's the ultimate dichotomy. Episode 89, Ultimate Dichotomy. Listen to Chilling with the Bros. Sorry, I got a bug in my throat. I got to recut that. Listen to Chilling with the Bros. Man, Brody right here on BroNation. Okay, cool. Did you already, because you just mentioned BroNation, but now it's already yours, or you move really fast. Really fast. World ain't wait for snails, bro.

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  • Bumperpodcast #358 – Who am I anyway?!

    Bumperpodcast #358 – Who am I anyway?!

    What in the world is going on with Natty? He wakes up, and doesn’t know where he is – who he is – or who anyone else is. Seriously. What is going on?!?

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com, or to call in and leave a message – 646.847.7976. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In episode 358 of Bumperpodcast, chaos erupts when Natty Bumpercar suddenly loses all memory and doesn't recognize his own show or his best friend Aloysius J. Pig. When lawyer Rufus T. Rufus attempts to claim ownership of the podcast by invoking a legal clause about going "loop-de-loop," Aloysius becomes suspicious. With the help of art therapist Doodle Poodle and his superior canine sense of smell, they discover evidence in the trash: a container of two-year-old broccoli cheese soup with purple felt attached—matching Rufus's jacket. The gang exposes Rufus's scheme to poison Natty and steal the show. This hilarious whodunit adventure features classic Bumperpodcast absurdity as the crew solves the mystery and restores Natty's world.

    Memorable Quotes

    “If Natty Pumpercat ever goes a loop-de-loop, a loop-de-loop, then all of the properties, you understand, are handed over.”

    — Rufus T. Rufus

    “I'm not a person. I'm a dog. I'm a talking dog. I'm a dog who doodles.”

    — Doodle Poodle

    “I think I would have gotten away with it, you understand? If it wasn't for all of these crazy dogs and crazy pigs and whatnot and et cetera.”

    — Rufus T. Rufus

    Topics: #amnesia #mystery #friendship #betrayal #lawyerjokes #arttherapy #comedy

    Featuring: Aloysius J. Pig, Natty Bumpercar, Doodle Poodle

    Full Transcript

    Aloysius J. Pig: Where have I… Where am I? Where have I been? I'm so confused. Hey, what's… Pumpercat, what are you doing? And who… What are you doing? Who are you anyway? What do you mean, who am I? What do you mean? What are you doing? Are you talking all weird? I don't know. It's me, your best friend in the whole wide world. It's Aloysius J. Pig. I don't know. What is wrong with you anyways, huh? You got a weird look in your eyes? I don't know. Are you okay? You're sweating a little bit? Are you okay?

    Natty Bumpercar: You're a talking pig. I don't understand it at all. It doesn't make any sense to me. Nothing is making any sense. I'm so confused right now.

    Aloysius J. Pig: Bro, I need you just to relax. This is clearly outside of my pay grade. Hold on one second. I need a little bit of help here. I need a little bit of help here. Pumpercat's gonna loop-de-loop. Now, excuse me. I heard you said you need a little bit of help over here. Now, is this something that a legal guardian of legalities could be assisting? Assistance? And you will, exactly? Is that something that his eye? Mr. Rufus T. Rufus. I may have to help you out as much as I can.

    Natty Bumpercar: Everybody here talks just so much, but I'm so glad that you're here. That pig was just talking at me. He was saying words that I don't understand. Oh, man. I don't know where I am, and I'm really confused. Can I get some help if you could please just help me out, please?

    Aloysius J. Pig: Rufus, you see what I'm talking about? He's gone on a loop-de-loop. He's gone on a loop-de-loop. Yeah, right. He's gone straight loop-de-loop, and that is a legal term. And by the letter of my contract, it says here, let's see, page 14, paragraph 77, addendum 4BXYZ. If Natty Pumpercat ever goes a loop-de-loop, a loop-de-loop, then all of the properties, you understand, are handed over. Handed over? Are passed over. What are you talking about? What do you mean? No, what do you mean by that? No, that's what I'm saying to you. I don't understand. He's fine. Something's just off-kilter. I walked in the room. He seems a little, you know, confused. I'll say confused. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. And maybe, you know, I did say he loop-de-looped, but maybe I didn't know the exact term. I didn't realize that was a legal term. It is. And now you're coming in here. So who exactly does all of this transfer to, huh? Well, now, as the instigator of the implication of his registrar… Now, in the whole legalese terminologies, what I have to tell you, my friend, is that it all actually, in actuality, reverts and processes and proceeds into my account. You understand? I don't… As the legal guardian, the signature, as the writer of the rules, if Natty Pumpercat ipso facto does go on a loop-de-loop, then all of this becomes… …under my transpire so that I can aspire to keep the wheels. I disagree. I'm moving on. You understand? I disagree. I don't know what you're talking about, lawyer Mr. His name is Rufus T. Rufus. But I just, I woke up, I was here, there was a microphone, this pig… That's me. …came in, and I'm still trying to wrap my head around that. And I don't know what, what's a bumper car? You are. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. I don't know what that is. Natty Pumpercar, that's you. Okay. Yeah, that's who you are. But I don't, I don't know what's happening, so I'm a little bit confused. I'm a little bit, I don't understand. I think we're all, we all need to calm down. We all need to take a couple of steps back here. I want you to put those legal documents away or I'm gonna, I'm gonna scoot you out of the room. Excuse yourself. I want you just to breathe a little bit. There you go, just breathe. There you go, just breathe. Now breathe a little bit. What, what? Now breathe a little bit. There you go, there you go, okay. I feel better. I've got another idea.

    Doodle Poodle: And, oh, what perfect timing. It's me. You're the person I was just about to come and get. Oh no, oh no. I'm not a person. Did I make you that way? Hup, hup. He's a dog. I'm a dog. I'm a talking dog. No, no, no. I'm a dog who doodles. What? Huh? What?

    Natty Bumpercar: What are you? It's me. Doodle doodle.

    Aloysius J. Pig: I don't know anything. Hup, hup. I don't know what's happening. There's now a talking dog and a talking pig and this. Uh. Okay. I should be breathing. I should be. I can't breathe. Um, so. I'm having a panic attack. I'm having. Naughty. I'm freaking out. I think I need to. Can I just lay down for a second?

    Doodle Poodle: I think you're going to be okay. What? I feel like. Have you gone a little bit loop-de-loop?

    Aloysius J. Pig: That's exactly what I said. There's the word. There's the legal term. There was now three people. Pigs and dogs have all agreed that the loop-de-loop process is in session. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. He didn't. He didn't know what he was saying. He's a crazy dog who makes drawings. Just let this leave him be. Now, doodle-poodle. I need you to do some sort of art therapy with Bumpercar because he's confused. He ain't know where he is. He ain't know who I am. He ain't know who you is. He ain't know nothing. All right? So, see if you can get him to do some remembering. Maybe through some drawings or something like that.

    Doodle Poodle: You understand? I understand. That's why I brought you in. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. So, Maddie Bumpercar is your name. And what I want you to do is just start saying some words. Okay. And what I'm going to do is make some doodles. And then I'm going to put all your memory brain marbles back together. And you're going to be totally fine. I swear. Okay.

    Aloysius J. Pig: Okay. Okay. Okay. I'm just going to accept this. Okay. Okay. That is happening. I'm just going to accept that I'm talking to a pig who says he's my best friend. I am. Uh-huh. Yep. And I'm going to accept that there's a dog who's going to try to do some art therapy on me. Perfecto. And we're going to see what happens. Yeah. Okay. Okay. So, start talking. All right. So, I woke up. I woke up here. In this place with the microphones and everything. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. Okay. I don't remember anything before I woke up. All right, so listen here. If you don't remember nothing, then this is it. That's the end of the story, and I believe we can put the pencils and the crayons and the cray-pars away because this is a dead end. The man has gone loop-de-loop, and we don't have any repercussions, so we should sign the papers. Just here, why don't you take that crayon and sign this paper, and everything will be done and fine and good and perfect and good and plenty. I don't trust none of this. I don't trust you, Rufus. I don't trust what's happening here. None of this makes no sense. Keep talking to the dog bumper car. We're going to get to the bottom of this. We're going to figure this out. You understand? We're going to get to the bottom of this. But that's everything I remember. I woke up. We're getting some good stuff here. And I was sitting in this chair, and there's a microphone, and the lights are on, and I can't think of anything else. I can't think of anything else. I can't think of anything. Wait. I do remember a smell. So the lights are on. I was sitting here. There was no sound. Okay. But there was an odd smell. Oh. But then you came in, pig. Huh? Pig. Yeah, Aloysius. Okay, and I thought it was maybe you. Wait, what? I'm sorry. I apologize. I bathe. I'm a pig, but I do bathe. You understand? I have my own en suite where I can go in and use the air. It's the restroom. I take showers, everything. We're good. Now, what was this smell? Hold on one second. Where do you think it was coming from? We don't need to worry about no smells. We don't need to. I say the smell is well, and there will dwell. You see? So we don't need to think about any smells or nothing like that. I think this is an open and shut case.

    Doodle Poodle: Well, wait a minute. This is done. Hold on, hold on, hold on. Not only am I a dog that makes doodles, but I'm also just a dog. And I have a really good nose. So I'm just going to smell around and see if I can find this. Wait a minute. What is this?

    Aloysius J. Pig: No. What is this in the trash can? This is inadmissible. This is incontrovertible. This is nothing at all. We should not be digging through the garbage. What are we, garbage men and pigs and dogs? No, no, no, no, no. Away from that garbage can. Come on now. Now, scoot.

    Doodle Poodle: Everybody, scoot.

    Aloysius J. Pig: You scoot.

    Doodle Poodle: You scoot. What is that? That's a container of that old broccoli cheese soup that has been in the freezer for two years.

    Aloysius J. Pig: I don't… Vampica, please tell me you didn't eat that, did you? I don't know. I don't remember, honestly.

    Natty Bumpercar: But I do have a weird taste in my mouth. So maybe I did. But if it was in the freezer for so long,

    Aloysius J. Pig: then why would I have eaten that? I never would have eaten that. That doesn't make any sense at all. Unless… Let me see that container. Holy cannoli. It has got a piece of purple felt on it. I am looking directly across the room at you, Mr. Rufus T. Rufus, wearing a purple felt jacket.

    Doodle Poodle: I believe, sir, that this is an open and shut case. Hold on, guys. You're all talking too quickly, and I'm still trying to draw all this. And I don't just… Hold on. I got… I got a stroke off for Natty's head. And then we were talking about felt. I don't know how to draw fabric, necessarily. And it's just… There's a lot going on right now. So… They like it all to slow down a bit.

    Aloysius J. Pig: Now, Mr. Aloysius J. Big, what I understand that you are saying is that you are pointing at me as the pro-quentin-twatter… Quentin… And it's a word. Pro-quentin-twatter of this crime. You're saying that I am a despicable. But what I want you to realize… Is that when you point your hoof, there are other fingers, hoofs, pointing back… No, I don't understand. That doesn't work. When you point your finger… One for… There's four fingers pointing back at you. But when you point your hoof, it's just kind of a… I guess they're all… So you are. You're all… You're pointing everything at me right now. Yes, indeedy-doodle. I sure am. I'm… So, I… If I'm to understand this correctly…

    Unknown: Whew.

    Aloysius J. Pig: You're my best… You're my best friend, Aloysius J. Pig. You are my lawyer, Rufus T. Rufus. You have papers right there that you're ready for me to sign to turn everything over to you. If I go loop-de-loop… And we find in this trash can a container of some two-year-old soup… That has… The same kind of fabric… That's on your jacket on it. Which makes me think that maybe… You served me this old soup…

    Natty Bumpercar: Which caused me… To go a little bit loop-de-loop. Is that what happened? Are you trying to take over everything?

    Aloysius J. Pig: Are you trying to take over… What is this thing called? This is called a bumper podcast. Yeah, this is called a bumper podcast. And I do believe that I will be making my ex-zones… And I think I would have gotten… Away with it, you understand? If it wasn't for all of these crazy dogs and crazy pigs and whatnot and… Et cetera.

    Doodle Poodle: Well, you better… You better scoot, buddy. You better scoot out of here. Because I don't like what you did to Nanny. And I wasn't even able to make a good drawing. I only got to use my nose. And I'm not nosy, poodle. I'm doodle, poodle.

    Aloysius J. Pig: Wow. This is… This is the world I live in? You guys are going to have to, like, re-educate me and tell me how this stuff works. Because I am so confused right now. And I… I'm really sorry that I forgot you. And that I forgot everything.

    Unknown: And…

    Aloysius J. Pig: Did we record all of this? Yeah, it's basically what we do. We come up with nutty, crazy stuff every couple weeks or so. And then people listen to it and it's all fun. It's all good. You're fine. Don't worry. You're fine. This really isn't that far out of the realm for what we normally do. If I'm to be honest. I absolutely concur on… Well, fine. We told you to scoot. I thought we were all kidding around. I thought we were all joking, etc. I thought we were just playing around. No. No, no, no. All right, everybody. Well, I guess… I guess I'm Natty Bumpercar. And I guess this is the Bumper Podcast. And I hope you had a good time. And I hope you had fun. And I want you to know that I think we're all best friends, right? Yeah. Okay.

    Unknown: We'll see you next time.

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  • Bumperpodcast #357 – Emotions

    Bumperpodcast #357 – Emotions

    If talking is therapy, then – this is something else, entirely. Natty brings on his two favorite guests to talk about emotions – and, other than a couple of flare-ups, things proceed nicely – which means that nothing gets broken. Listen – Learn – Love!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com, or to call in and leave a message – 646.847.7976. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this heartwarming episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar returns from an unexplained absence and teams up with two special young helpers, Emerson and Oliver, to explore the world of emotions. The trio plays an emotion game where they practice expressing feelings like happy, sad, mad, and scared, though things don't always go as planned. The conversation takes delightful detours into topics like pancakes that taste like eggs, Pokemon characters Totodile and Mudkip, a mysterious haunted bench in their backyard, and the difference between play dates and hangouts. The episode showcases the improvisational charm and authentic family dynamics that make Bumperpodcast so endearing, ending with an attempt to get the brothers to express love for each other.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I don't know at what age it stops becoming a play date and it becomes just like a hangout. You think 10?”

    — Emerson

    “We can record for 10 days if you want to… Just say it at the same time. You don't even have to say the names.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Kids talking about emotions. This is gold. This is podcast gold.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #emotions #feelings #family #brotherhood #pokemon #childhood #fear #happiness

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: hey everybody welcome to the bumper podcast i'm sorry i wasn't here last week i don't know where i was probably in a submarine or on top of a mountain or maybe in space i can't remember it's just such been crazy times lately but today i have two special helpers and we're gonna play a game and we're gonna talk about emotions and what is that do you guys even know what emotions are yes no oh well then this is gonna be perfect so let's see emerson do you tell me what you think emotions are they're feelings yeah that's perfect description oliver does that make sense to you yes okay so what i have is a list that i have made in my head of emotions and when i say the emotion i'll say a name and then i want you to hear to do your impression of an emotion okay okay so we'll start off with happy oliver can you be happy you can't just smile you have to actually say something because it's a podcast happy that's you're happy okay so uh emerson you want to try happy you're not happy no okay we'll see if we can get you around i'll do happy i am so happy that i'm hanging out with my two buds right now see that's happy i'm happy um let's try another emotion um because that one didn't seem to work super well how about um oh i've got a good emotion hungry you're so hungry are you just gonna say the emotion but wait a minute is it is hungry even an emotion

    Unknown: no i don't even know what do you need to change

    Natty Bumpercar: because sometimes it changes yeah so hungry is actually not an emotion guys the emotions that

    Unknown: we're going to go through there's like happy they're sad and mad yeah sick is not an emotion

    Natty Bumpercar: isn't that strange it's a physical manifestation are you hungry right now it's weird i feel like somebody made daddy pancakes this morning they taste like eggs well no mine didn't they didn't actually taste like eggs they tasted better this morning if you want some shining nice real нак 나와어요 They tasted like vanilla and almond because Daddy is a master pancake maker.

    Unknown: Not anymore.

    Natty Bumpercar: What? What happened? You don't like my pancakes anymore?

    Unknown: I love them. They taste like egg.

    Natty Bumpercar: Well, the next time I will not put an egg in even if the recipe calls for an egg. I apologize.

    Unknown: Put peanut butter in it.

    Natty Bumpercar: This time? I thought the last time I put peanut butter in it you did not like it.

    Unknown: I did.

    Natty Bumpercar: You did?

    Unknown: Uh-huh.

    Natty Bumpercar: Let's see. What emotion were you this morning when you tasted my pancake? Were you sad?

    Unknown: No.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, so…

    Unknown: I was depressed.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, no. That sounds very sad. Holly, have you ever been sad before? No.

    Unknown: He's lying.

    Natty Bumpercar: He's lying. Oh, that sounds like you're mad now. Holly, can you be mad at the microphone? No, not monster. I don't want you to touch the microphone. Mad! Oh, gosh, Ollie, you seem so angry. Emmy, sweetie, Emmy. I'm mad! Why are you so mad? Oh, my gosh.

    Unknown: I'm not mad, actually.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, you're just pretending because I forgot we're playing the game. Has Daddy ever been mad?

    Unknown: Yeah, yeah, yes.

    Natty Bumpercar: Emerson, what does it sound like when Daddy's mad?

    Unknown: I don't know.

    Natty Bumpercar: Is it like, Emerson! Like that? No. Emerson! Ooh, yeah, that was pretty good. Sometimes I go, Poppy! And sometimes I'm sad when I do this. I go, Poppy! And sometimes you… Please go to sleep. I'm so tired, Poppy.

    Unknown: I don't know what you're doing. She has to sleep on the ground.

    Natty Bumpercar: Okay, so if Poppy is on you, then you make that weird noise and then you tell her to sleep on the ground, or does she know what that means?

    Unknown: I don't know what it is. I just push!

    Natty Bumpercar: Huh? You push her?

    Unknown: Gently!

    Natty Bumpercar: Okay, gently. Gently, gently. Emmy. What about, uh, we're at four minutes, so we only have a couple more minutes left. So, Emmy, have you ever been… Uh, so we did… So you've never been happy?

    Unknown: No.

    Natty Bumpercar: You're not happy right now? No. Because we're going to go someplace?

    Unknown: I know we're going somewhere, but that's the only time I'm happy.

    Natty Bumpercar: Wait, the only time you're happy is when you're going someplace? Mm-hmm. What about, is there other times you're happy?

    Unknown: When I get stuff.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, when you get stuff and when you go places. So are you not happy just in general? Oh, man. What about you, Ollie? Are you ever just, just happy?

    Unknown: Yeah.

    Natty Bumpercar: Like, when you wake up, are you happy?

    Unknown: Yeah.

    Natty Bumpercar: When you are in the shower, are you happy? No.

    Unknown: Yes.

    Natty Bumpercar: It's like Emerson, you love the shower.

    Unknown: I know.

    Natty Bumpercar: But you're not happy?

    Unknown: I was talking to Ollie.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, well, Ollie is more happy when he's in what? The bath. The bath. That's right.

    Unknown: I hate the bath.

    Natty Bumpercar: You don't like the bath? Why is that? Shh. Oh, really? Really? Because of…

    Unknown: Shh. Shh. We both like Snake and Turtle.

    Natty Bumpercar: Snake and Turtle, you guys do like.

    Unknown: Wait, what is it again? I forgot.

    Natty Bumpercar: No, it's not Snake and Turtle, is it?

    Unknown: Oh, no. It's Toad-a-Dile and Mudkip. He's Toad-a-Dile and Mudkip.

    Natty Bumpercar: Wait, what?

    Unknown: Toad-a-Dile and Mudkip, the Pokemon.

    Natty Bumpercar: What's Turtle-down?

    Unknown: Toad-a-Dile.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, Turtle-dile and…

    Unknown: Toad-a-Dile.

    Natty Bumpercar: What is it?

    Unknown: Toad-a-Dile.

    Natty Bumpercar: Toad-a-Dile and Mudkip? I like Snake and Turtle better. I don't know why, because it sounds weirder to me, but…

    Unknown: No, that would… Then that would be called… No, we named it something else.

    Natty Bumpercar: Something beside Toad-a-Dile and Mudkip?

    Unknown: Yeah.

    Natty Bumpercar: Did you know in Pokemon Go the other day that there was extra Mudkip day? But I didn't see a single one. Not a single one.

    Unknown: What?

    Natty Bumpercar: Ollie, can you think of any other… Is this an emotion? Scared?

    Unknown: Hmm. Scared.

    Natty Bumpercar: Have you guys ever been scared?

    Unknown: Yes. Yes.

    Natty Bumpercar: Emerson, what's the most scariest thing ever to you?

    Unknown: Me.

    Natty Bumpercar: Okay. You do not like to be alone, right? Same here. What about… Well, what about this? I'm going to make it even scarier. What if you're alone and the light goes off? That's scary, right?

    Unknown: Mm-hmm.

    Natty Bumpercar: What about if you're alone and the light goes off because it's a thunderstorm and the power goes out? Man, this sounds terrifying.

    Unknown: No, this is scarier. You're out in the woods at night.

    Natty Bumpercar: What? You've never been out in the woods at night. How do you know if that's scary?

    Unknown: What about the creepy bench?

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, talk about the creepy bench. That's in our backyard.

    Unknown: Yeah, football's gone.

    Natty Bumpercar: Football's gone?

    Unknown: What do you mean? Done forever.

    Natty Bumpercar: Football's done forever? Yeah.

    Unknown: Why? I'm not sure what it means. I can't even look for it when I'm in the kitchen.

    Natty Bumpercar: The football's hiding?

    Unknown: Yeah.

    Natty Bumpercar: So wait, so you and your friend were playing football in the backyard.

    Unknown: Yeah. No, we were just punting it.

    Natty Bumpercar: Yeah, so you punted it. You were punting with flip-flops on yesterday. I think your friend was kind of impressed. He was, because he, I even heard him. He was like, Emmer, be careful with your foot. And you were like, I got this. I'm a punting fool. I think you're happy when you play football. Mm-hmm. Or when you play sports or when you're having like a play date, like a hangout. Yeah.

    Unknown: Why is it called a play date?

    Natty Bumpercar: I don't know why it's called a play date. I was just, did you hear right before I said it that I kind of paused? Mm-hmm. Because I don't know at what age it stops becoming a play date and it becomes just like a hangout. You think 10? Okay, so we're a few months, yeah, we're a few months away from that. But for now, we can still call it a play date, right? Mm-hmm. And then at 10, we're going to be like, this is officially a hangout. Yes. Okay. So Ollie, do you know anything about the Haunted Bench?

    Unknown: Yes.

    Natty Bumpercar: Can you tell me about it? It sounds really scary.

    Unknown: Oh my gosh. Ollie got possessed.

    Natty Bumpercar: Ollie got possessed? Yeah. What possessed Ollie to get possessed? What? A lizard in our yard?

    Unknown: It was.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh my goodness. What other animals have we seen in our yard this week?

    Unknown: A snake. No.

    Natty Bumpercar: This week? No, we saw a?

    Unknown: Why is it like?

    Natty Bumpercar: Huh? What like? That's the sun. Sun. Oh. Mr. Golden Sun. You remember that song? No. Ollie, do you remember that song? Can you sing it?

    Unknown: No. I don't even remember anything about it. She does.

    Natty Bumpercar: I bet you do. And you know what would make me happy? Hearing you sing that song.

    Unknown: No.

    Natty Bumpercar: Because I like it when you sing.

    Unknown: It's not in public.

    Natty Bumpercar: It's not in public. We're in our studio right now.

    Unknown: Sure.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, that's true. People are going to hear it. Can I sing it? Mr. Sun. Sun. Mr. Golden Sun. Okay, that's good. Okay. Uh, so let's see. We did, we did fear. We did scared. We did happy. We did sad. Uh, Ollie, Ollie. I want more. Ollie, are you ever sad? I know you get mad. Who do you get mad at, Ollie? You can't just point. Emerson. Why do you get mad at Emerson? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. This is like a group therapy session all of a sudden. Why is Emerson a big jerk? Do you think is he just being a big brother or is he just being kind of mean? Oh, no, Ollie, that was not one of the answers. But you still love him to pieces, right?

    Unknown: Yeah.

    Natty Bumpercar: What? Well, now this podcast cannot end until there is mutual love all the way around.

    Unknown: It's been 10 minutes.

    Natty Bumpercar: I want to hear Emerson say, I love my brother, Ollie.

    Unknown: Ah, sorry. It's been 10 minutes.

    Natty Bumpercar: Well, we're going to be here for 10 hours if I don't get. All you have to do is say, Ollie, Ollie, you say, I love my brother, Emerson.

    Unknown: No. No.

    Natty Bumpercar: You have to say it.

    Unknown: Never.

    Natty Bumpercar: Emerson, you have to say, I love my brother, Oliver. Ah, you guys. We can record for 10 days if you want to. No. Okay, let's do this. Just say it at the same time. You don't even have to say the names. Just say, I.

    Unknown: I.

    Natty Bumpercar: Love.

    Unknown: No.

    Natty Bumpercar: Say love.

    Unknown: No. Like.

    Natty Bumpercar: Fine. I like. Can you say, I like, Emerson? Say, I. Like. Like. My. My. Brother. Ow. Yay. I was squeezing you out. Guys, thanks for talking about emotions. Do you feel like we accomplished anything? What did I forget? An emotion? Love? Oh, that's a feeling. I can talk about love all day. Because I have my two friends here. My two boys. Ow. My firstborn love and my secondborn love. And all I need is Poppy and all the love is complete. I love my wife also, but she's not here. Oh, okay. Ow.

    Unknown: This is going to be past the closing.

    Natty Bumpercar: That's okay. People love this type of episode. Kids talking about emotions. This is gold. This is podcast gold. Don't let me listen. Okay. Uh, let's see here. Oliver, go upstairs and get your shoes. Emerson, get your stuff ready. Listen, Bumper Podcast. I feel like we can't do that right now. Yeah, I know. I feel like we talked about a lot today, right? We talked about being sad. And now there's a fight. Hey, Emerson. Oliver, can you just come here? Oliver. Emerson, you do your own thing. All right. Ollie. What just happened?

    Unknown: I was going up and Emerson picked me up.

    Natty Bumpercar: He picked you up? Is he that strong? Oh, my gosh. Emerson is stronger than me. Okay. Can you say goodbye, Bumper Podcast?

    Unknown: No, I'm good.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, no. I don't want to end on such a sad note. Let's do a clapping song and then we can go. Clap, clap, clap your hands. I'll say it. Clap, clap, clap your hands.

    Unknown: What? What? Clap, clap, clap your hands. Clap, clap, clap, clap your hands. I forgot. Clap, clap, clap. Clap, clap, clap your hands. Clap your hands, everybody. Clap your hands. Who said that? Clap, clap, clap your hands. Come on. Now clap your hands. Okay, now you're smiling. All right. Bye, Bumper Podcast. You are the best.

    Natty Bumpercar: And you know what, Bumper Podcast? What emotion I'm feeling right now? Happy that you're my friend.

    Unknown: Basketball. Basketball.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, my word.

    Unknown: Basketball.

    Podcast: Download | Embed

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  • Bumperpodcast #356 – Birthday

    Bumperpodcast #356 – Birthday

    It’s Natty Bumpercar’s Birthday – and, he wants to celebrate it with you in the worst way – and, what is the worst way? It’s song – of course!! Ollie is here to help, and – so is a little mouse!!! Birthday!! Birthday!! Birthday!!!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com, or to call in and leave a message – 646.847.7976. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this special birthday episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar celebrates his birthday with impromptu musical performances from the entire puppet cast. Aloysious J. Pig kicks things off with memories of baby Natty, followed by Rufus T. Rufus reluctantly singing despite claiming it wasn't in his contract. Doodle Poodle joins in with his signature doodling style, mentioning a mysterious gift left on Natty's pillow. The episode features heartwarming moments as Natty receives birthday wishes and hugs from Oliver, and closes with Natty's touching birthday wish: asking listeners to go out and be kind to others as his present.

    Memorable Quotes

    “Oh, I remember when you was a baby then, you would cry and colic all of the time. Your diapers smelled, and we all said, well, one day you'll grow up and be just fine.”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    “Well, this wasn't in my contract. I didn't know I was going to have to sing, but I don't mind if I do, because my voice has a special ring.”

    — Rufus T. Rufus

    “I want everybody to go out into the world and be nice to somebody today. If you see somebody that needs somebody to be nice to them, be nice to them.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #birthday #celebration #music #singing #friendship #kindness #family

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Aloysious J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, Doodle Poodle

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: Hey everybody, it's me, Matty Pumpercar, and this is a super special day, and this is a super special episode, because you know what it is? It's a birthday episode, and you know whose birthday it is? It's my birthday, and I think the only way that we can do this, the only successful, awesome, cool way that we can do this, is probably through song. But don't worry, because if I do it in song, it won't take very long, because I'll forget a lot of words, and they won't always rhyme. Take it, pig.

    Aloysious J. Pig: Oh, I remember when you was a baby then, you would cry and colic all of the time. Your diapers. Smelled, and we all said, well, one day you'll grow up and be just fine.

    Rufus T. Rufus: Take it, Rufus. Well, this wasn't in my contract. I didn't know I was going to have to sing, but I don't mind if I do, because my voice has a special ring. And it's nice. It's Natty Bumpergar's birthday, and that is a special thing. Rufus, you didn't sound like yourself today. Yeah, I know, son. It's hard for me when I'm singing and everything. But Natty Bumpergar's birthday is the most wonderful. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

    Unknown: Oh, my God. I got a good one. Santaf哈哈哈 Excuse me, son.

    Rufus T. Rufus: I got some contracts I gotta go sign. Doodle poodle.

    Doodle Poodle: Did you have something you wanted to say Well, of course I do. Because I like to sing, and I like to draw, and I like to doodle all of the time, and I like to make sort of the funny thing is the drawings and such and whatnot, and all of the time. Waaah! And Nami, you know what? I think I made for you a special little gift. I really hope you like it. It's up on your pillow slip.

    Natty Bumpercar: What are you saying, Doodle Poodle? What special gift did you leave on my pillow? And what's a pillow slip? Is that a pillow cover?

    Doodle Poodle: Yeah, I don't know. I was just trying to rhyme something and I got a little confused. I'm not normally much of a singing dog at all. I'm more of a doodle dog and what not. Hey, Oliver, did you want to sing anything or are you just going to hang out and listen?

    Natty Bumpercar: I think he's just going to hang out and listen today. Are you having fun listening though? He gave me a thumbs up. So it's Natty Bumperguy's birthday. Thank you to Pig and everyone. We had Aloysius songs. Oh, wait, that's Pig. Huh, how much fun. And Doodle Poodle and Rufus. Is there anyone else in the house? No, that's strange because I have in my pocket here this tiny little mouse.

    Unknown: Me and Sammy are here. Ah, although they're not in a mood today to sing. Well, Chat didn't say much. They're not singing? They're not. They're laughing. I just want to say thank you hehe. But hey, hey, it's Rufus, you're a интерاج guy. Thank you to everyone in the house. It's Rufus tipo my name. And I'm part of his family. Thank you for your love and for listening.

    Natty Bumpercar: levant home, though my Christmas card didn't sound too good, we mean everything. There are still luck left in this house. Well, it's the only little house we have and why are you interested in? nice of you to sing a song about me i've never met you before thanks for singing to me thanks to everyone well i remember the day i was born a hundred and so years ago and all of the puppets and all of the animals they all came out and said whoa look at that natty bumper car n a double t b-u-m-p-e-r-c-a-r it's natty bumper car n-a-t-t-y-b-u-m-p-e-r-c-a-r it's natty bumper exactly did you want to say anything what's a good thing to say to somebody on their birthday happy birthday that's a sweet thing to say what's another nice thing to say to someone on the birthday you know what i'll say to you i love you and you're awesome oh i got such a sweet hug from my ollie bean my ollie bear my ollie boo-boo cakes but listen bumper podcast just because it's my birthday here's what i want for my present from you i want everybody to go out into the world and i want everybody to be nice to somebody today maybe even multiple somebodies, especially somebodies that you don't even know. If you see somebody that needs somebody to be nice to them, be nice to them. If you see somebody that doesn't need somebody to be nice to them, be nice to them. Somebody needs help, help them, all right? Because that's how we make the world a slightly better place, even by just a little bit, even by just like one little iota, one little ounce, one little smidge, and that is what I want for my birthday. Is that a good present? You think you can get that for me for my birthday? You don't know? I think you can, because you're pretty awesome. You know who else is awesome, Bumper Podcast Coutures? You are!

    Rufus T. Rufus: Bump, bump, bump, bump, birthday. It's your birthday, and I want to celebrate it in the worst way, because you're older, and you are bolder, and it's your birthday, birthday, birthday, birthday, birthday, birthday, birthday, yeah, it's your birthday,

    Natty Bumpercar: and I want to celebrate it. And I'm going to celebrate it in the worst way. Yeah, we made up this fun little song for you. And we're going to sing it all day long. All day!

    Unknown: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

    Podcast: Download | Embed

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  • Bumperpodcast #355 – Kid Football

    Bumperpodcast #355 – Kid Football

    Natty has a couple of helpers on today’s podcast. One is a one word answer giving football star, and the other is really good at the trampoline – and running from the dog.

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com, or to call in and leave a message – 646.847.7976. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this heartwarming family episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar celebrates his son Emerson's triumphant football playoff game where he scored his first touchdown of the season, helping the previously winless Jaguars defeat the Cowboys 24-6. The episode features both of Natty's sons, with Oliver sharing his pool adventures and touching his father's heart by making him a custom mug after his original tea mug broke. The family discusses their upcoming plans to visit Time Warp Comics and see Spider-Man, while dealing with the challenges of their new 16-week-old puppy Princess Poppy. This casual, improvisational episode showcases the genuine dynamic between Natty and his children, complete with tangents about birthdays, podcasting techniques, and puppy training struggles.

    Memorable Quotes

    “Oliver did the sweetest thing in the world this week it made my heart cry a little bit… Oliver went to camp and he made me a new mug for my tea.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Ladies and gentlemen, what you're hearing right now is the love of a father and a son over tea. Tea for me.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “You know who you are? You're my best friend.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #football #fatherhood #family #sports #children #puppies #heartwarmingmoments #flagfootball

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: Good googly moogly I was out on the field today watching some football and I want to tell you people that the world needs heroes right now and I have one of the heroes standing next to me this is the bumper sports podcast coming to you live and I'm talking about the gridiron I am talking about the trenches I am talking about the men against men fighting for inches for yards with the football ladies and gentlemen what I saw today was the pinnacle was the peak was the high point of sports entertainment in all across the land so if you know who I'm talking about and I think you do you're gonna be very excited if you don't know who I'm talking about then I'm about to educate you if you don't know nothing about football then you don't know nothing about nothing but you know who does my next guest also I forgot to say welcome to the bumper podcast what's going on my man oh hi are you kid football are you the super speeder are you the running machine oh well this is more exciting than I thought it was gonna be tell me what happened today on flag football Sunday playoff you ran the whole field so you were on one side of the field and then you ran where was it again the entire football field I am very very very impressed did you how did it feel felt good are you gonna give me one word answers for the rest of the show no oh there he goes ladies and gentlemen kid football best football play I saw all day all day you know what I'm saying all right I'm gonna hand this over now we're gonna talk to somebody else somebody also very important in my life somebody who is a trampoline wizard somebody who can run from a dog in the back of the car and run from a dog in the backyard like you don't even know what's happening like it ain't even hard at all let's and lemons and then it's a little bit right pa this is a blip blip blip blip blip ladies and gentlemen here he is Oliver Cornelius tell me what's going on what is my name my name is sporty bumper car I guess I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I don't know I didn't really think too I didn't think too hard about the I didn't think obviously I didn't think too hard about the voice because I was baby it was basically Rufus T Rufus and the name I obviously didn't think about very hard either hey everybody it's me Natty bumper car we had a big football game today with Emerson he did wonderful his team that Rufus is gone Rufus that wasn't Rufus that was sporty bumper car remember we just established that yeah usually I work that stuff out before starting the podcast today I did not do that today I did not do that today I did not do that today I did not do that today I did not I did not but Emerson so his team was the Jaguars he played flag football his team was 0 and 5 that means they had lost five games a whole season and then they're in the playoffs they're playing the Cowboys who were 1 and 4 which means they won one game lost four games and lo and behold the Jaguars came through what was the final score 24 to 6 was the final score so Emerson scored a touchdown it was his first touchdown and he was the first to score a touchdown of the season I was a very proud papa that other thing was in the preseason all right so anyway Ollie tell me about yourself what'd you do today I went to the pool you went to the you played pool no I went to the pool oh you went to the pool I see how was that good did you float on top did you sink to the bottom did you float on top or did you

    Unknown: swim a little bit did you go off the diving board the high dive I wasn't even there and you went off

    Natty Bumpercar: the high dive who protected you who saved you you don't even love me anymore you don't even need me oh thank you Oliver did the sweetest thing in the world this week it made my heart cry a little bit so what happened was I had a mug of tea it got knocked over it got cracked and broken and I was so what happened was I had a mug of tea it got knocked over it got cracked and broken and I was sad and then Oliver went to camp and he made me a new mug of tea and a new mug for my tea and what did you want to write he made me a new mug of tea and a new mug for my tea and what did you want to write you dad and what were you gonna put next to the words Oh it's but like I because I didn't have that mug we had an old mug and I added you THANK YOU standing with me and you can point the finger I through the google right there this is the

    Unknown: first one after the third the fifth and fourth are twelfth from the fourth is the number one and you're going to play a game and you're going to have a game tomorrow don't you think you're gonna play I didn't have that much time.

    Natty Bumpercar: It's okay. I loved it so much. It was the sweetest thing you've ever done in my entire life.

    Unknown: I changed it to that I love you.

    Natty Bumpercar: Aw. Ladies and gentlemen, what you're hearing right now is the love of a father and a son over tea. Tea for me. What's that? That little line right there? Whoa. Ollie, who is a professional podcaster at this point, noticed, because we do use templates for our Bumper podcast, that one of the tracks was not cleared out by our engineer, producer. I'm very sorry about that. It's okay, producer. But listen. And so he saw that there was a track coming up that was going to interfere with our vocal track, and so he quietly let me know, and we paused it and fixed it. High five. High five, Bumper podcaster. Good. Bumper podcaster. Bumper pod… Bumper… Bumper…

    Unknown: Bumper podcast group.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, Bumper podcast group. Bumper podcast cateers. Where are we headed to now, guys?

    Unknown: Time Warp and then the movie theater.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, we're headed to Time Warp Comics here in lovely Cedar Grove, New Jersey.

    Unknown: And then we're going to see Spider-Man fall from home.

    Natty Bumpercar: And then we're going to see Spider-Man fall from home. Spider-Man. Spider-Man. Spider-Man. Spider-Man.

    Unknown: That is not going to make it. That is definitely not going to cover my eyes when Spider-Man is fighting the Fire Monster.

    Natty Bumpercar: Wait, Oliver, you're too young to see Spider-Man, aren't you?

    Unknown: I'm going to cut all your hair.

    Natty Bumpercar: Emmy, stop. See, we're actually doing something. Why don't you go upstairs and get ready, and then we'll come up and get you.

    Unknown: And my dad's dad sent the Nairam some stink bombs.

    Natty Bumpercar: Yeah, it's true. I did get a bottle. I did get a box in the mail that had not only stink bombs, but emotional bombs as well. Ah.

    Unknown: What?

    Natty Bumpercar: What? What does that even mean? No. Emotional. That's what I said.

    Unknown: Are you going to use them?

    Natty Bumpercar: Do you know whose birthday is this week, Ollie?

    Unknown: Emerson's.

    Natty Bumpercar: Huh?

    Unknown: Emerson's?

    Natty Bumpercar: Is it Emerson's birthday this week?

    Unknown: I have zero idea.

    Natty Bumpercar: You have zero idea whose birthday it is. That's interesting. Let's see if we can find your brother. Hey, Emerson. Are you around? Do you have any idea? So we're coming up. Whose birthday is next in our family?

    Unknown: I think it's Emerson's.

    Natty Bumpercar: It's whose? It's mine. It's my birthday. When is it? Do you know? No idea?

    Unknown: No idea.

    Natty Bumpercar: Ollie has zero idea. Well, guys, funny thing. To get these tickets to see Spider-Man, you actually have to know when my birthday is. So I guess it's today. Is it really? No, it's not today. When is it? I'm not telling anybody. You know what, Bumper Podcast Cateers? No, this is what's living right now. You love me more than my own children. On my phone, I replaced the picture of my children and put my dog, Princess Poppy, on there. Even though she doesn't sleep. Even though she bit Emerson's arm today. Because she's a beast.

    Unknown: And she bites me.

    Natty Bumpercar: She bites Ollie all the time. We are in that biting puppy phase. And it's not super pleasant. The what?

    Unknown: Sometimes a kicker.

    Natty Bumpercar: What?

    Unknown: Sometimes a kicker.

    Natty Bumpercar: A kicker?

    Unknown: I sometimes, I kick.

    Natty Bumpercar: No! You're not supposed to do that. That's bad. That's mean.

    Unknown: Wow.

    Natty Bumpercar: Ladies and gentlemen, we… We've been doing this for a long time. Do not. We love our dog very much. And she's 16 weeks old.

    Unknown: We've been doing this for a long time.

    Natty Bumpercar: We've been doing it for 8 minutes and 46 seconds. Should we wrap up? Should we quit? Should we go?

    Unknown: We should never quit.

    Natty Bumpercar: We should never quit. Ladies and gentlemen, this is the 24-7, all-year-round, 365-days-a-year bumper podcast. It's a live stream. It's going to be on for the rest of your life. Please listen. Please like. Please subscribe. You are amazing. Huh? Okay. Oh, wait. We're going to get another friend over. I thought that was a pretty good out. But evidently, Ollie didn't think so. So he's going to go over into… To the basement here at headquarters and find a new friend. Oh. Hey, puppy dog. Who are you? Shrug. The puppy dog shrugged at me. Okay. Bye, puppy dog. Okay. Go away. You're sullying our beautiful podcast. So, Emmer is a touchdown scorer. Ollie is a trampoline monster. And Ollie is a trampoline monster. And I am Natty Bumpercar. And you, you know who you are? You're my best friend. Bumper podcast! Yes! This is what I mean!

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