Some little birds have floated into the house to let me know that on some computers (like any computer that looks at this here internet on a pc using Internet Explorer – which is maybe a bunch more computers than you can shake a stick at) – are getting a ton of white space up there – right above this post (at least for right now – since this should be the topmost post) . . . Well – I don’t want all of that space – and so come hook or crook – rain or shine – I will figure out how to get rid of that there white space.
And that is all that I have got for this second . . .
https://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpg00natty bumpercarhttps://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpgnatty bumpercar2006-05-24 15:22:092006-05-24 15:22:09Evidently – we have some sort of problem . . .
Seriously – I am going to post about this later . . . figured the picture would be a good tease . . . and I am nothing if not a tease . . .
Okay – okay – now the story that I was talking about – the story that the picture is about – and just a quick quick bit of what led up to 2:30 am Tuesday night . . .
I drove one thousand nine hundred and fifty three miles (1,953) over the course of about ninety six hours (96). The driving ate up about forty five (45) of the hours that I was gone – and has left me with a bleary attitude and nursing a sore wing. (yeah – I may have – might have – it is possibly possible that I just referred to my arm as a “wing” – no looking back . . .)
Where was I going? Why would I drive so far? Well that’s all a bit beside the point – just trust me – I drove a whole bunch – and went to some places – saw some people and did some stuff. If I get the notion – and some time – I will sift through my brain and shake some of the stories of the in-between out onto the table for you to see . . . but I can’t promise anything – I got really bleary . . .
So – after driving seventeen hours (17), I went to the post office to check my p.o. box – and then to the bank to deposit a check – and then just as I was passing chik-fil-a, I noticed to police officers having one of those chats – where the cars are facing in opposite directions – so that they can give a firm hand shake and proper see you later when the conversation is done and they scoot about their merry way.
As soon as I went by – zoomp – one of the cars was right behind me. You know that magical thing that police seem to do where they seem to actually be driving on top of your car right before they either swoop around you or click the lights on?! Well that was the game that he decided to play – I was too tired to even get the ice in the pit of my stomach – just maintaining my speed and not doing anything too erratic . . . almost home – almost home – and then the lights came on.
Evidently he was a mounty (according to the picture) – and so he (evidently) got off of his horse and sauntered up to my window – with the flashlight of god in my eyes (it was so so so bright – and I was so so so tired). I then got excited that I was going to get to talk to somebody – and so I pulled the “What seems to be the problem officer?!” line out of whatever cliche movie that it is from – and as he is checking out my ID and saying something about my tail light being out, I started yammering on about how I had been driving for seventeen hours (17). We had a little chit-chat about the drive and then he apologized for holding me up and said “Now you go and get some sleep . . .”
His horse – who I decided to name “Champ” – because he seemed so much like a “Champ” whinnied as he stood on his back legs and for just a second they were captured perfectly in the moonlight . . . man I wish that I had my camera ready – and that it wasn’t possibly illegal to photograph police officers as they charge out into the night . . .
Then I slunk home to catch some “z’s” – as the kids are calling them these days (and by “them” I probably mean sleep(s)?!) – and to dream of “Champ” the mighty police horse pulling my lifeless body from the icy waters of the Hudson . . . what a night of sleep it was!
Some of the above may/may not have happened . . . I will say it again – and I stand beside my initial point . . . I was a bit bleary . . .
https://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpg00natty bumpercarhttps://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpgnatty bumpercar2006-05-17 23:39:462012-11-27 17:44:23And that's when the Police stopped me . . .
So today I was working upstairs – which is where all of the “magic” happens – and then ‘bing-bong’ goes the doorbell. I rushed down the stairs and answered the door in an extremely dissheveled and frenzied manner – which – and I know that you weren’t necessarily asking – is usually a great way to open the door if you are trying to get rid of the people doing all of the ‘bing-bong(ing)’.
Now wait wait wait young sir – you may just be thinking to yourself – why in the world would you want to scare people away from your door?! Well it is an epic struggle from those who are at home in the middle of the day and those people who are all about knocking on my door to give me some crazy booklet with a baby holding a star and looking at a rainbow – or whatever – you know those people . . . Here is how the conversation typically goes:
Them:Why hello sir! What a glorious day we are blessed to be having. Would you be interested in . . .
It is usually by now that they realize just how dissheveled and frenzied my door opening was and start to trail off. So then I mumble something about “Having to work . . . working from home . . . gotta go to do some work” or something even more effective like coughing uproriously and then – and yes I do go back to the mumble for this – “Really sick . . . work from home . . . sorry about my dog . . . gotta go do something.” At which point they usually give measured glances to me and then at each other and decide to just cut their losses give me their pamphlet and go to the next house.
Today was the exception (and I have to point out that this was their third visit this week – and so I think that they are catching onto my little game) – I pulled the mumbling work thing – they gave me their pamphlets – and then the deal was done – right?! Oh no friend – because as they were leaving – just before they threw in their “Have a blessed day” thing – the leader mentioned that they would love to come back and talk with me about whatever I was supposed to be reading in their pamphlets . . . like some sort of potential pop-quiz or something. I was trapped – my tricks hadn’t gotten rid of them at all and so in a vain effort I threw out the “Even though I work from home . . . meetings . . . sometimes I go out . . . to meetings.” or something like that. She just looked and – even though I’m not even really sure if she said anything – this is what I got from her eyes – – “We know when you are here . . . we will find you . . .” So I have lost this battle . . . and will be boarding a cruise to Antigua on the first of the month . . . or maybe I’ll just have them in for tea and cakes . . . or – or – or . . .
https://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpg00natty bumpercarhttps://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpgnatty bumpercar2006-04-29 20:13:362012-11-27 17:44:22You know those people that come to your house?
https://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpg00natty bumpercarhttps://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpgnatty bumpercar2006-04-19 15:28:302012-11-27 17:44:13Now my dog needs a license . . .
Okay . . . So this is where I say howdy to an all new and improved way for me to waste my time – and by that I probably mean that it is a quick and easy place for you to come and see whatever it is that I am up to. Mostly – I am going to try to keep it to whatever I am working on at the time – with a little bit of flotsam and jetsam thrown in for decent measure (by ‘floatsam and jetsam’ I probably mean my dog, cats and whatever other ridiculousness I happen to fall into) . . . So Enjoy!
https://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpg00natty bumpercarhttps://www.nattybumpercar.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/04/sticker.jpgnatty bumpercar2006-03-16 22:21:082006-03-16 22:21:08This is the first "official" post post post
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