Natty Bumpercar: well well well if it isn't the bumper podcast with me natty bumper car this is number 114 of the of the year of the day this is number 114 i'm sitting i'm sitting here i'm not sitting here i'm sit how do you i'm standing but i'm not standing because i'm on my knees what is that called i know when you sit you're on your took us when you stand you're on your feet what's it called when you're oh i'm kneeling i thought i was so literally for a second there i got so excited because i thought that i just invented something where we needed a new word in the lexicon in the language and i figured uh that in whatever book holds all the words the dictionary that maybe a bumper car would show up there and it would be like this guy invented a new word for when you're on your knees it's not sitting it's not neat uh standing it's kneeling but i guess it's already there man what a letdown you would have been part of history today bumper podcast no but so i'm kneeling as the kids are evidently calling it these days right now because my chair is gone i don't have a chair i don't have a stool i don't have a bench i ain't got nothing i don't even have my two front teeth because i for christmas and evidently if you already have something and then you uh ask for it well it it cancels it out and then you get you get a piece of coal which don't tell anybody but that's part of my plan i'm really angling for the piece of coal because it's very chilly in headquarters can i tell you bumper podcast that the best part of living in headquarters which is a castle obviously is that we have a moat and so when winter comes around the moat freezes over and it's a big circle and we just get to get our skates on and just do laps and laps and laps and laps all the way around headquarters it's so much fun we have races and uh you know prizes and stuff the worst part is if you're ever in a race with a dragon he breathes fire and steam so uh you know let him stay in front of you and he'll be fine and he'll be fine and he'll be fine and he'll be fine and he'll be fine and for most of the race and then slip past him because if he's behind you he's gonna huff and puff and you're gonna fall through the uh the ice into the moat and then you gotta contend with the moat monster and there is nothing more disgusting than moat water i mean that's why when it's frozen over it's okay but when you're in there and you have skates on you know just like i'm swimming but i can't swim because i have skates on it's gross so don't skate on a moat with a dragon when he's behind you you learned a lesson today listen to this we learned a word caneling and we learned a lesson don't skate with dragons