Tag: podcast

  • Bumperpodcast #11 – Off the Rails

    Bumperpodcast #11 – Off the Rails

    Not only were we off the rails in this episode – but – to my knowledge – I’m honestly not even sure if rails were even seen at any point.

    Better luck next time?!

    [Click the title to get to the episode!]

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

    About This Episode

    In this hilarious episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar is completely exhausted from life with his new "roommate" – his code word for his new baby. Natty struggles through the episode, rambling about accidentally having a metronome on during recording and trying to stay coherent despite severe sleep deprivation. He mentions he had planned to talk about world-changing inventions, but his bone-deep exhaustion derails those plans. Between references to dust having dust and his bone marrow being tired, Natty delivers a relatable and funny take on new parenthood while trying to maintain his hosting duties.

    Memorable Quotes

    “My bone marrow was tired, the crust on my eyes has crust, the dust on my dust has dust. I don't know what that even means, I just know I'm so sleepy all the time.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “I have a code word for my baby, it's that he's my roommate and I didn't know if I was being explicit enough.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #parenting #sleepdeprivation #newbaby #exhaustion #podcasthosting #improvisation

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: can i can i tell you guys wait i think i was normally when you can i you say like can i get a witness wait i have the metronome on man i'm dying here one second please all right i'm back now for you that was no time at all but for me there was i had to find metronome and turn it off because what i was hearing in my my ear was my babbling the music and so i was keeping i was i was i was babbling to a four four time and well we are off the rails today uh and i and i have to tell you why and i'm not blaming it on anyone but it's my new roommate you and he uh he i talked about him last week it's very exciting it was it still is it's tremendously exciting stuff uh he doesn't like i mean he doesn't like to sleep and uh i i can't sleep because i'm constantly um is the new roommate breathing what's the new roommate doing over there at 4 a.m when he he's gurgling he's making some funny noises let's go see what he's doing sleep no who needs to sleep sleep is for the week and for the people who don't have uh roommates i have a code word for my baby it's that he's my roommate and i didn't know if i was being explicit enough but i needed you to know i was supposed to this week talk about things i had topics i i i'd been i've been inventing things that i think are going to change the world that we live in today to make it a better place not one of those inventions that uh a slippery slope that takes us to badville bad time bad bad hold on bad sylvania that's what i was trying to say but my my uh my my lips kind of went oh i I gotta let you guys know the baby we had a code word my roommate he's awesome he's great i just have to figure out how to sleep again because my i was my bone marrow was tired the crust on my eyes has crust the dust on my dust has dust i don't know what that even means i just know i'm so sleepy all the time and i don't want to bring that to the bumper podcast so i shan't well maybe i shan i don't know we're gonna try to shan not but we might shan yes so it could shan either way and i just need to know i just need to make sure that you kids are with me solidarity

    Unknown: i'll keep on to the Wolverine see my childhood hi oh hi hi hey hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi

  • Bumperpodcast #10

    Bumperpodcast #10

    A baby is born . . . and sometimes he makes some noises – I try to figure out some of the noises.

    [Click the title to get to the episode!]

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

    About This Episode

    In this episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar announces exciting news that's been spreading through all communication channels: there's a baby! After encouraging the studio audience to clap loudly enough, Natty brings out the baby who promptly begins crying. The episode features Natty's humorous observations about the constantly crying newborn, including jokes about the baby's New York origins affecting his sounds ("gaga goo goo") versus Natty's Southern baby babble. Throughout the segment, Natty attempts to soothe the dancing, crying baby while reflecting on the challenges and sweetness of caring for an adorable but vocal infant. The episode ends with Natty trying to get the baby to sleep.

    Memorable Quotes

    “he was born in new york so he's like gaga goo goo hey you know because that's what he sounds like”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “as long as he's doing his baby dance crying his baby dance crying i think that everything's going to work out for the world”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #babies #parenting #crying #newyork #regionalhumor #infantcare #comedy

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: bumper podcast news this is news this is news you don't know or maybe you know it's been all over the emails it's been all over the texts it's been all over the cell phones and the landlines and snail mail there's a baby that's right there's a baby you guys want to meet him i bet we could if if you clap loud enough we can bring him out let's hear it yeah that's a good clap a good cheer for the studio audience here at the bumper podcast let's bring that baby out everybody let's see what he has to say oh nice music baby coming out oh oh no oh you guys the baby cries he cries all the time how do i mean he's really cute he's adorable he's so sweet but yeah you see he cries a lot and it's sad when he cries a lot because you don't know what to do for him because he's just a teeny tiny little baby you know what let's let's drop the music and then yeah we can have just a a nice little crying baby in the background just to let us all just put us all in the same mindset right and that's a lot of crying let's put a little bit of music in the background a little there a little more dancing dancing baby crying dancing baby crying dancing baby crying yeah okay i got it okay so he doesn't only cry i've heard him make other noises before he uh at one point he was like gaga goo goo or you know like gaga gaga goo goo because he's he was born in new york so he's like gaga goo goo hey you know because that's what he sounds like uh when i was a baby i was born in the south and so i was like gaga wait i was like gaga goo goo no that doesn't sound like it but he i don't know what i sounded like i was like and he's like oh like i don't even he doesn't sound like that either he sounds you know a lot more let's be honest like you know like this and holy beans is that depressing but it's you know it's fine that's the noise he has he's got little lungs he's got to work them out he's gotta do a little bit of work in that and as long as he's doing his baby dance crying his baby dance crying i think that everything's going to work out for the world so Baby, you should go to sleep. It's time to go to sleep. Alright, I am the Bumper Podcast. You guys are great, but I have a baby, and he is even greater.

  • Bumperpodcast #9

    Bumperpodcast #9

    Needing a new camera . . . I stumble upon a much worse idea . . . A traveling portrait artist . . . Poodle.

    [Click the title to get to the episode!]

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

    About This Episode

    In episode 9 of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar embarks on a hilarious quest to find a new camera for upcoming events. From researching daguerreotypes to seeking out a mythical camera bird inspired by a TV show, Natty's search takes an absurd turn. Unable to find the perfect bird-powered camera, Natty instead hires Doodle Poodle, a portrait artist with his own voicemail announcement, to follow him around and draw pictures. The plan quickly backfires when the peppermint-scented, screaming poodle proves too much to handle, and Producer helps Doodle Poodle escape before Natty can even fire him.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I looked up bird, I looked up camera bird, bird camera and nothing came up.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “There was a screaming poodle who was in my house and following me around wanting to draw pictures of my baby and I'm pretty sure that he smelled a little bit like peppermint.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Wait are you serious? Did I just get walked out on by them? I didn't even get a chance to fire him.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #cameras #photography #technology #doodlepoodle #hiringmishaps #portraitart #comedy

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Producer, Doodle Poodle

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: all right bumper podcast it is your wednesday and we are gonna jump right into it here's a thing i was on a mission i had to get a new camera because we have things that are happening that i'm gonna want to take a picture of i wanted to get a camcorder and i didn't know what to do and so i did a lot of research and you know i was just like well i've heard daguerreotypes are really nice you know i've heard silver tents um there was a television show at one point that i was watching and you know they had a bird who actually lived inside of a box like inside of a camera and and you he would he would make the picture with his beak and and i thought that was maybe the best option but i i went on you know the big uh the big internet website there where they sell things and i couldn't find it i looked i looked everywhere i looked i looked up bird i looked up uh camera bird bird camera and and and and nothing came up and so what i ended up doing was kind of along that line along that vein uh i couldn't find a camera bird and so i i said you know what i i think that maybe what we should do is we should just hire a portrait artist and and have him come around with us everywhere we go hello boy

    Producer: boys and girls let's see what doodle boodle is drawing right now

    Natty Bumpercar: yeah and that was the worst part of the whole thing well you'll see maybe it's not the worst part but he came with his own voicemail oh hi everybody it's me

    Doodle Poodle: it's so great that you hired me

    Natty Bumpercar: yeah on second thought and i don't even know how this is on a second thought because i clearly that that was the worst part was that there was a screaming poodle who was in my house and following me around wanting to draw pictures of my baby and i'm pretty sure that he smelled a little bit like peppermint so

    Producer: hey dp what say we blow this joint

    Natty Bumpercar: wait are you serious did i just get walked out on by them i didn't even get a chance to fire him unmitigated disaster all right bumper podcast at nattybumpercar.com

  • Bumperpodcast #8

    Bumperpodcast #8

    Oh . . . There are robots in the world – indeed there are. But why are they so sad?!

    [Click the title to get to the episode!]

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

    About This Episode

    In this episode of the Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar announces a new creative project for the website involving photographs of sad robots he's spotted around town. When an actual sad Robot character interrupts to question why Natty takes pictures without permission, the conversation takes an unexpectedly melancholic turn. Natty promises to help make things better for the sad robots and acknowledges that this episode is less funny than usual. He invites listeners to email him with their thoughts at bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com as he works to both document and hopefully cheer up the depressed robots of the world.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I look around town and I see a lot of really sad robots around and so I've been trying to take their pictures”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Why do you take the sad robots pictures? Well it's because they don't like pictures”

    — Robot

    “Normally bumper podcast is supposed to be fun it's supposed to be funny people are supposed to go giggle giggle giggle but today kind of depressing”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #robots #photography #sadness #newprojects #depression #helpingothers

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Robot

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: it's the bumper podcast what's going on everybody it's been pointed out to me that for the past few weeks i didn't tell you where you were i didn't tell you what you were listening to and so right off the bat i want to let you know where you are and what you're doing you're listening to the bumper podcast here i am natty bumper car and i'm gonna tell you about something that i've been working on it's a new project it's a new like feature thing that i want to do on the website and i think it's gonna be really cool it's do you guys like robots yeah i thought you might because everybody likes robots kind of a lot and yeah yeah that's yeah it's about sad robots you guys oh okay well that i don't really know i don't really get into that part of it but what i do know is that i look around town and i see a lot of really sad robots around and so i've been trying to take their pictures and um hopefully really soon what i'm going to do is start showing you their pictures so that you can see the sad robots and then maybe you can figure out why the robots are sad and maybe you oh i really got excited there did you hear me start

    Robot: talking fast why do you take the sad robots pictures well it's because they don't like pictures well

    Natty Bumpercar: i kept interrupting you i'm sorry are are you a sad robot is that i don't even really know who you i don't you know well hey buddy i i think it's all gonna work out for you i'm just taking some pictures and i think we're gonna make everything better for you i hope at least

    Robot: that's a big sigh all right you know normally bumper podcast is supposed to be fun it's supposed

    Natty Bumpercar: to be funny people are supposed to go giggle giggle giggle but today kind of depressing what do you guys think do me a favor if you could email me at bumper podcast at natty bumper car.com i'm not gonna spell it out for you but you know where it is and hopefully we'll fix these robots right right and hopefully uh we'll be a little bit funnier next time too

  • Bumperpodcast #7

    Bumperpodcast #7

    Ladies and Gentlemen . . . We are at war.

    Unfortunately – the inanimates are winning.

    That is all – for now!

    [Click the title to get to the episode!]

    Podcast: Download | Embed

    Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Spotify | iHeartRadio | RSS | subscribe

    About This Episode

    In episode 7 of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar shares his ongoing battle with an army of misbehaving pillows. What starts as a seemingly alarming battle cry turns into a massive yawn, setting the tone for Natty's hilarious confession about his nightly pillow wars. He describes how bad pillows mysteriously replace the good ones by bedtime, comparing the experience to sleeping on an angry badger or a sourdough roll. As the battle escalates and the pillows continue winning, Natty contemplates drastic measures—including the possibility of sleeping in the tub. This short, absurdist episode showcases Natty's signature improvised comedy style as he personifies household items into formidable foes.

    Memorable Quotes

    “It's like I'm sleeping on a badger, an angry badger.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “It's officially pillows 10, me less than 10.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “This is what happens when your inanimate objects start attacking you and start winning.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #sleep #pillows #everydaystruggles #absurdisthumor #inanimateobjects #personalbattles

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: do you guys hear that sounds like a battle alarm sounds like somebody sounding the battle oh man that was a big yawn i know i got y'all excited and it was a big battle alarm and then i started yawning a lot it was a big yawn and i made you listen to that and um here's the thing guys i'm gonna take you deep inside some personal battles that i'm fighting right now some personal strife that's going on in my life a little thing that i deal with almost every night it's a pillow fight it's a pillow fight times 10 it's a pillow war that's right every night i go in i hop into bed and what's going on there's pillows that are misshapen that are attacking me that aren't letting me sleep that are beating me up you it's officially pillows 10 me less than 10 and what i do is i'll go in and i'll find the pillows that i like there's a lot of pillows a lot of them i don't like and i'll put those pillows where i know they are and then by the time i go to bed the bad pillows have snuck their way back they are very sneaky these bad pillows and they've taken me to bed and i'm like oh my god i'm gonna go to bed and i'm gonna go to bed and i'm taking the place of the good pillows and i go to lay down and it's it's like a sour i'm laying on a sourdough roll but not crunchy like that or like flaky or tasty no it's like i'm sleeping on a badger an angry badger and there are in this fight in this battle there are lines that have been drawn and i'm not explaining this very well i am just so flustered right now and this is what happens when your inanimate objects start attacking you and start winning i'm not winning this fight i don't know what i'm going to do the only thing that i can think of and i it's a terrible compromise is i might start winning i don't know what i'm going to do but i'm going to keep sleeping in the tub