Tag: bumpercar

  • Bumperpodcast #144 – Under Thumb

    Bumperpodcast #144 – Under Thumb

    Bumpercar kindly asks the Universe to “Step off, Back away and Move on.” – mostly because he is tired of being mushed under the Universes icky thumb.

    How you ever been mushed under a thumb? Let us know by sending an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com – because – we can help!

    We love to help!!!

    About This Episode

    In Bumperpodcast episode 144, host Natty Bumpercar shares his feelings about the week-long gap between podcast episodes, confessing that he pines away counting down the days. Natty gets emotional discussing how the universe feels like it's pushing down on him with its metaphorical thumb, leading to a heartfelt plea for personal space. To cope with feeling overwhelmed, he plans to eat Cinnamon the Horse's oats for extra oatiness and drink a beverage with awesome in it. This introspective and humorous episode showcases Natty's signature rambling comedy style as he contemplates running either the show or the ship after a recent promotion.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I sit in the corner and I look at the calendar and I just cross off days. There goes one day and then I sigh really loud and really long.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “I'm gonna eat a bowl of cinnamon the horse's oats this morning because I need to be a little bit more oaty.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Step off back away move on. Personal space is what I'm saying universe.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #personalspace #emotions #breakfast #universe #missingfriends #self-care #comedy #introspection

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: holy beans and rice and other things that go with beans and rice ladies and gentlemen it's me natty bumper car and it's the bumper podcast what are you doing how's it going i missed you i mean i'm starting to think maybe daily maybe two three times a day we need to have bumper podcasts because here's the thing seven days in between them here's what starts to happen i start to pine i do i sit in the corner and i look at the calendar and i just cross off days there goes one day and then i sigh really loud and really long just like there goes two days and then by like day three or four i'm just a pile of uh mush just on the floor so sad you guys don't want to see a sad bumper car there's nothing going on

    Unknown: about a sad bumper car it's only sad i i hope i i i'm sorry i just it's really really emotional right now there's a lot of stuff going on

    Natty Bumpercar: feels like you ever wake up bumper podcast and feel like the entire universe has its thumb resting right down upon you kind of hard like it's pushing you down which is bad enough right you got a thumb on you you and then it starts to just mush you back and forth and back and forth come on thumb get up off me what are you doing you know you just write me a note put it on the fridge i always go to the fridge i gotta go to the fridge write me a note i'm gonna see the note maybe give me some bad news there i don't also need you pointing at me or thumbing me as as it were i don't need you mushing me i'm wush enough i'm mush fine by myself thank you so much you go over there personal space is what i'm saying universe like you've got everything all around you universe let me just have this little bumper car space right here step off back away move on step off back away move on am i right i feel like i'm right that's fine maybe i just need more sleep maybe i just need more fiber i'm actually gonna eat a bowl of uh cinnamon the horse's oats this morning why because i feel like it's gonna make me really oaty and i need to be a little bit more oaty maybe i'm also gonna have a beverage what kind of beverage i don't know something with awesome in it because i need a little bit more awesome to so that i can run the show the ship am i gonna run the show or the ship i forget i recently got a promotion and it's either that i'm gonna run the show or run the ship

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  • Bumperpodcast # 136 – That Voice

    Bumperpodcast # 136 – That Voice

    Where was Bumpercar last week? He was deep down in a dirty sickly hole where he was left after being beaten up by the flu and bronchitis …

    And – he missed you very much.

    Have you ever been beaten up by a cold? Let us know by sending an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com – and then we can high-five!!

    About This Episode

    In this hilarious episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar is suffering from bronchitis and can barely speak, but the show must go on! With his voice completely shot, Natty takes listener requests to perform different characters and voices despite the pain. He gamely attempts impressions of a witch grandmother who wants to bake bread and cast spells, and a mobster whose tough-guy routine literally hurts too much to complete. Throughout the episode, Natty jokes about officially changing his name to "Natty Bronchitis" and struggles hilariously with words and breathing. It's a short but memorable episode showcasing Natty's dedication to entertaining his audience even when he's clearly under the weather.

    Memorable Quotes

    “My name has officially changed, we went through everything, the website will change soon enough to Natty Bronchitis.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Hello, how's it going? It's going to be a beautiful season this year at the witch house. I guess I'm a witch grandmother, I didn't realize this when I went into the character.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “You never want to listen to a podcast where the host actually dies on the show, so I think that we're gonna wrap it up.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #illness #voiceacting #improvisation #comedy #listenerrequests #characters #bronchitis

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

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  • Bumperpodcast 131 – Whispers

    Bumperpodcast 131 – Whispers

    Ooh! It’s one of those whispering shows where secrets are being told … You should definitely listen in to find out which secrets are being discussed.

    But – someone – or something – try to shut us down because of what we are talking about ….

    Then – Bumpercar gets agitated and starts going on about trashcans running all around the neighborhood …

    Do you have awesome secrets that you want to unload? Let us know by sending an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com – and everything will be ice cream and cake!

    I love ice cream!!

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  • Bumperpodcast 130 – Foodie

    Bumperpodcast 130 – Foodie

    Natty Bumpercar is a bit of a foodie … He decides to make all of you a bit jealous by describing just how delicious his lunch was today …

    Why should you care about his lunch? Because there was a surprise that came along with the meal … And everyone loves surprises – don’t they?!

    Have you ever had food? Let us know by sending an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com – and we’ll all pat our bellies together.

    Is that how you spell the plural form of belly?

    About This Episode

    In this episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar shares his culinary misadventures with a disappointing microwaveable meal called "Asian Surprise." Natty describes himself as a foodie and walks listeners through the elaborate preparation process of this instant meal, complete with noodles, mysterious vegetables, and brownish goo. Despite his attempts to elevate the dish with chicken stock and peanut butter, the meal turns out to be a massive letdown. Natty hilariously questions why he doesn't just skip the meal entirely and eat spoonfuls of peanut butter instead, ultimately ending his lunch with some jello.

    Memorable Quotes

    “The surprise was hey you're gonna cook this and you're gonna be really let down you're gonna be severely disappointed.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Why don't I just skip that entire step of putting this thing together why don't I just eat a spoonful of peanut butter for lunch seems like it'd be maybe maybe be better for me.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #food #cooking #microwaveablemeals #disappointment #peanutbutter #humor #instantnoodles

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: well of course bumper podcast you know that i natty bumper car am a bit of a foodie i'm sure that's gotten around town i only eat at the finest restaurants i only go to the finest establishments for instance today i had some food prepared for me down in the kitchens here at headquarters uh it was a wonderful plastic bowl in which you opened it and then there was a plastic bag of noodles and a little tin bag full of what was called vegetables so i'm eating healthy as well and then there was another little plastic baggie full of uh viscous brownish kind of goo uh you know and then you prepare it you uh open the noodles put them in the plastic thing and then you open the vegetable and you spread them around nicely put the goo on put two not one not three but two tablespoons of water i use chicken stock because i like to elevate my meals a little bit uh and then you put on the top pop it in the microwave and 90 seconds later you my friends are going to be very disappointed at what comes out of that microwave i think it was called asian surprise is what i feel like the meal i think that's what it said on the packaging and the surprise was hey you're gonna cook this and you're gonna be really let down you're gonna be severely disappointed that you just spent the last we'll see 90 seconds plus it probably took about 45 seconds about three and a half minutes of your life picking out this asian surprise putting it all together microwaving it waiting the one minute in between microwave ding and uh actually opening the package and uh and i forgot there's one other little thing it's one there's a little tin it says topping and so you put the topping on because that's probably going to make it better it doesn't it was so bad so bad so so so bad and so here's what i do sometimes is uh the chicken stock obviously highfalutin but then sometimes what i'll do is i'll take a spoonful of uh peanut butter and i put it in things because i like how peanut butter tastes and i mean i don't know why i don't just skip that entire step of putting this thing together why don't i just eat a spoonful of peanut butter for lunch seems like it'd be maybe maybe seems like it maybe be better for me if i did that i'm not sure i'll go just have a spoon i could have half a spoon of peanut butter and i'll have a spoon over the jelly and yum-a-rific so then after that uh i ate about uh half not even half uh but then i ate uh something which is near and dear to my heart a little plastic cup of jello

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  • Bumperpodcast 129 – Skadoodle

    Bumperpodcast 129 – Skadoodle

    Bumpercar is back and he is officially healthy wealthy and wise … or at least part of one of those. We learn about the Mountain Top Wizard and the dress code to go and see him and we finally get Bumpercar’s stance on sweater vests.

    It is one of those days that makes you want to say hip-hip-hooray! Today on the Bumperpodcast.

    Send me an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com – and let me know how you dress when you go to the top of the mountain.

    I wear pants!!

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    About This Episode

    Natty Bumpercar is feeling great in this solo episode of Bumperpodcast, despite his microphone rig literally jumping off his desk. He explores the linguistic oddities of words like 'skadoodle' and 'skadaddle,' questioning why one is considered more ridiculous than the other. Natty also shares his reluctance to visit the mountaintop wizard due to his lack of proper mountain-climbing attire, particularly vests. The episode showcases his signature rambling comedy style as he discusses fashion, proper button-pushing etiquette learned at etiquette school, and his preference for cardigans. It's a delightfully absurd and improvisational journey through Natty's stream of consciousness.

    Memorable Quotes

    “I press it with my pinky because i went to etiquette school and i know proper uh button pushing etiquette”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Skadoodle is in my book no more ridiculous than skadaddle”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “I can tell by the cut of your jib that everyone who listens to the bumper podcast is dressed at least to the nines if not the eights”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #fashion #language #wizards #etiquette #microphones #comedy #cardigans

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: hey what's going on bumper podcast it's me natty bumper car and i am healthy and wealthy and why i'm healthy i'm not wealthy and i'm not wise i'm healthy i really just went overboard there i'm healthy but the phrase is healthy wealthy and wise so i got kind of excited wow the last couple of weeks have been rough i hope i'm not over modulating too much i see my little lines going over and over where they're supposed to go i apologize it's a good day i'm that happy i uh right before i started recording i went my little my finger i press it with my pinky because i went to etiquette school and i know proper uh button pushing etiquette and so i was pushing the button with my pinky and the entire mic uh rig is what i'll call it the entire uh the boom and everything uh it just exploded off the desk it jumped at me it leapt at me as as as as is to say as if to say uh no bumper car not today i'm not going to deal with your shenanigans i'm not into it i don't want it you skadoodle skadoodle skadaddle now wait a minute skadaddle why is that afraid like a word and when someone says something you're like now you just you kids just skadoodle on out of here then you point your laugh at them like they've done something ridiculous skadoodle is in my book no more ridiculous than skadaddle so bumper podcast if you could listeners come with me by staying in your seats talk to me but don't actually open your mouth because i can't hear you because this isn't right now it's not a conversation i hope at some point that we can figure that out but that seems like some sort of technical wizardry that is so far above and beyond me and i don't know any technical wizards i mean there's that wizard who lives uh on the mountain mountaintop wizard i think his name is uh he doesn't come down very often and i'm not going to go up to him because i don't have good mountaintop shoes uh or i don't i also don't have a good mountaintop outfit if we're going to be honest a lot of people when they go to mountaintops they wear vests and i don't have any vests because i'm not a vest kind of guy so what i'm supposed to just go up to the mountaintop wizard all dressed weird and he's right off the bat he's gonna be like i'm not gonna talk to you did you tell you come to the top of my mountain dressed in a uh sweater i do wear a lot of sweaters mostly with buttons i like sweaters with buttons i'm gonna call them cardigans even though i'm not even really positive if that's what they're called or not you can tell me you know i know you're a fashion a fashionable bunch a fashionable lot you know how i know that because i can see it in your eyes i can tell by the cut of your jib that everyone who listens to the bumper podcast is dressed at least to the nines if not the eights

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