Author: natty bumpercar

  • Bumperpodcast #369 – Finders Keepers

    Bumperpodcast #369 – Finders Keepers

    Some ‘local yokels’ burst onto the scene without much of a plan – but, with a real hankering to jibber-jabber. Pig is not impressed.

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this chaotic episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar returns to his studio only to find two uninvited southern gentlemen have taken over his equipment, claiming "finders keepers" and squatter's rights. Aloysious J. Pig confronts the intruders about proper podcasting etiquette and basic manners, while lawyer Rufus T. Rufus arrives with mysterious past connections to the trespassers. The situation escalates with confusing legal arguments, southern sayings about dogs and butter, and cryptic references to a forbidden "crow situation" involving bird law. Natty struggles to regain control of his own studio as the would-be podcasters insist the dusty, unused equipment is now legally theirs.

    Memorable Quotes

    “What you guys did is uh to be clear is you broke into our house and you uh started just using our equipment to record”

    — Aloysious J. Pig

    “We foundered keepered and we wandered and we are not gonna squander this is we found this equipment down here unused dusty”

    — Intruder

    “Finders keepers if you find something try to return it people lost something and they might be sad about it losers weepers is not legally binding”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #podcasting #squattersrights #southernculture #legalhumor #trespassing #finderskeepers #studiochaos

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: no no no because what i'm saying is that if we're gonna record a podcast and we need to have some sort of structure and we need to have some sort of an idea listen it's phenomenal that we found this equipment that is unused it's got dust on it but listen to me people aren't gonna listen just to hear my vocal chops they're one and gonna listen to a specific thing listen to me uh man you gotta figure it out as you go along you can't just come into it and not have an idea you gotta see how things shake out on the tree you gotta listen to what the people want and then you can build from there that that that you there makes sense to me um so maybe i could talk about my truck or maybe i could talk about uh the way i make a barbecue or uh uh planting season or going out into the woods or you know all the different who is this so uh my name is uh aloesius j pig and my question for you is who are you exactly never seen you before it's what are you doing here it looks like a little hog just wandered in here i'm a pig wiggly wiggly wiggly what are you doing little hog no come on over here who i can talk to you for a sec listen bro i don't know who you is and i don't like how you're talking to me i don't really don't like how you're looking at me and i don't like that you're using bumper cars equipment okay so i would suggest and i would recommend and i would ask you to talk to me about this that you please ask i do now listen up there uh piggy pig uh i i'm you have to excuse my friend he doesn't come out very much and we ain't never seen no talking uh poor sign as you as you as you are and so what i i'm sorry if he must have offended you but when we got here this equipment was unused unverified and so i believe it is within our recompense that we can use so i think what was saying uh my pink little pal is that uh this is ours now by squatters rights squatters rights finders keepers now uh little piggies who lose things on the losers so understand thank you so uh you two um local yokels uh burst into the studio you see some equipment and then you decide that it's yours that ain't how finders keepers works at all the rules is if you find something on the beach on a trail on a street i mean first off that still ain't yours right let's just be honest you found it sure but it really ain't yours you could uh you if you you could turn it into the authorities you could uh put it up on a post so maybe if the people come back they could find it uh you could uh you know look for some sort of authority or something but what you guys did is uh to be clear is you broke into our house and you uh started just using our equipment to record uh listen what is it exactly you're recording listen we we foundered keepered and we wandered and we are not gonna squander this is we found this equipment down here unused dusty as i've said so mistreated equipment and we are deciding to utilize it to its fullest potential because what we have my friend that you do not have is experience okay you understand what i'm saying now what i'm speaking to is truth fine listen i don't know this this stuff belongs to natty bumper cards a bumper podcast you i you didn't even do an intro i heard you when you was talking when you do a podcast you gotta be like hey my name's billy or whatever your name is and then you gotta say and this is my show it's this so you gotta tell people what they're listening to all right what you guys did is you burst in and you're just like yammer yammering on the tape and then you're gonna put that out there and then you're gonna put that onto the world no one's gonna listen to it because it ain't make no sense all right i know i know listen believe me around here we know what it takes to get people to listen to podcasts and yammer yammering ain't gonna do it okay so without further ado i'm gonna ask you one more time to skidoo and if you don't i'm gonna have to get my lawyer involved one second here piggy loo i'm hearing a lot of voices down here that i do not uh recognize exactly rufus t rufus i haven't seen you in a dog's age what is it dog's age exactly a certain amount of time in the south you understand so is it like a set amount of time or is it just like some random dog is there like a specific dog as you know big dogs they don't live it's sad but little dogs you want to get a medium-sized dog for the for the length of dog like you want to get a medium-sized dog okay just it's we just say it's a dog's age it's it's a soliloquy here in the south that we say things just we can say things like uh oh that butter don't burn that's something we say in the south don't know what it means necessarily i could say uh butterscotch but uh everything i don't know there's something else with butter that you can say butter smooth as butter that's not that's not it uh but we have phrases you understand no i don't understand and i don't think that you really understand because you're just talking about butter all of a sudden first she was talking about a dog and how long dogs live and now you're talking about butter and said no i don't exactly make no sense to me okay rufus do you know these guys well now i do hey mr rufus uh mr t mr t root hello mr rufus t i need you son when you talk to him he is a man of the law and so i want you to respect him all right yes sir daddy i'm sorry sir wait a minute so now he's your dad and you both know rufus yeah and you okay i i don't even know what i walked into today i don't even know what i walked into today i don't even know what i walked into today i really don't if i'm to be honest that's my thing i think i say that a lot if i'm to be honest yeah it's my it's my crutch is that a verbal crutch if anybody doesn't know a verbal crutch is something that you find yourself saying over and over so for instance if i'm walking up to a door and i go open sesame if i do that every single time i come to a door that becomes like a thing and people are like oh it's the sesame pig like that and i'm just like hey i say other things if i'm to be honest and they're like yeah that's right you're there if i'm to be honest pig and it becomes like that all right so watch out for verbal crutches and verbal tics and whatnot because people sometimes will acknowledge you'll be like oh this is the pig that comes in every time and gets macaroni and cheese he's the mac and cheese pig and i'm just like i eat other things i got an apple last week all right aloesha's uh you know i i feel like i should straighten a cup of things out for you were tangent in there you were being tangents you were tangentially moving around a little bit now i feel like i should straighten a couple of things out here i do recognize these uh gentlemen and i cannot uh as a client attorney actually comment on their relationships but what i can tell you is that uh i think by finding keepers this is now their equipment see that's what we was trying to tell him roof but he didn't believe he said we just burst in here i think you know that we are not the type that burst we are genteel men genteel men and we would never burst into a situation and just try to take things over as such does anybody know what natty is natty bumper car because i i can't i i did not wake up this morning expecting that have to deal with this and i don't feel like i've got it in me right now so i can't rufus if you're on their side now then i gotta just i gotta find some other avenue some other you guys are exhausted speaking of exhaustion you guys remember rufus mr reed was that time that we was out in the field and then all the flock of crows just jump up in the air and we were like it was do you guys remember that it was there's a lot going on with them birds because you had something in your pocket like some sort of seed bird seed i think it was and so they were coming at us that was a hooting man that was a hooting man and i was just like we gotta run we can't these birds are gonna attack us no i gotta hush up it's crazy time it's good seeing you you hush up child you're not supposed to be talking about such thing remember we said according to bird law that we would never divulge the information about that day all right so we can't be broadcasting it all around the land everybody to see this right so just stop you talking uh we made a pact that day that we we could could and would not ever discuss and talk and uh jibba jabba about the crow situation if you understand what i'm saying the bird seed and the food we just do not discuss okay yeah okay i'm sitting here looking around the room i'm gonna go but uh you guys i guess natty can figure this out all right i'm just a cute little pig i'm just the voice i'm just the face of the show i don't have time to deal with you guys so uh toodaloo nice to meet you oh see you later piggy pig oh not a hog we we don't eat all the way home this is my home okay i thought we established that my home studio is in my house and you're in my house in my studio using my equipment that belongs to bubba cock i'm gonna go yeah now he actually does live here just upstairs here's a little styled room with hay and a troll and uh whatnot so he he is correct in that uh we we we do have some legal footing on the uh funds keepers law but he the house we he has he has rights to that i do have to interject if you i guess you're the one with a law degree so from the big university so we'll trust you he knows what he's talking about you know um who is this thing hey i'm natty bumper car you're in my house you're in my studio you're touching my equipment who exactly are you did the pig come and get you yeah he came and got me uh-huh well so here's the thing uh these gentlemen uh associates of mine uh in the previous years past have discovered this equipment and have decided to take it upon themselves to make it for themselves and they have uh enacted squatters rights funds keepers so we are a bit of a legal pickle if you don't understand that i might have to divest myself of the whole situation because as you are my current client and they are my previous uh uh we'll say relations relations no i don't know that i should get involved other than to say you are not standing on thick ice my friend it is very slippery and it is very thin so be careful what you say because it can and will potentially be used next year cool so all i'm gonna say is please leave and i don't know why you're here well we're here because we found this equipment and we are gonna record and it it there's nothing you can do based on these paper works that we were just handed and it says right here finders keeper he should be leaving yeah weeping he should be he should be now listen daddy i i see that your eyes are dry currently but if you wanted to be weeping right now it would actually seal the deal so you if you start to weep at all i gotta tell you it is legally binding losers weepers that so if you then do weep then you do give it up the whole studio understand yeah fine i understand um this all blows my mind but i should tell you guys when i was walking in um something was going on in the back of the room and i was walking in and i was waiting for the guy tongue-in-cheek that you have 500 000 dollars about me what i've got to do all this so anyway we're going to get out here we're going to look for the police week i apologize i didn't send up an episode uh but evidently when i do that random people come in and start trying to take over uh so just always remember guys finders keepers if you find something try to return it people lost something and they might be sad about it losers weepers is not legally binding i am not a lawyer but i will tell you right now that if you start to weep when you lose something that does not in fact mean that the person who found it gets to keep it all right i'm natty bumper guard this is bumper podcast and uh i think i'm gonna clean the studio out right now it is pretty dusty

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  • Bumperpodcast #368 – Spicy Socks

    Bumperpodcast #368 – Spicy Socks

    Popcorn the dog has been feasting on socks – which leads to a bit of a kerfuffle, and to a potential business opportunity!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In episode 368 of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar faces a crisis when his dog Popcorn develops an insatiable appetite for socks. Aloysious J. Pig breaks the news that the puppy has destroyed every sock in the house, leading to a chaotic discussion about puppy behavior and responsibility. The situation escalates when a mysterious new lawyer named Frenchie appears on the scene, creating confusion and competition with the show's resident lawyer Rufus T. Rufus. With Producer possibly masquerading as the French attorney, the episode spirals into comedic chaos. Despite the sock-eating mayhem and legal shenanigans, Natty shares exciting news about new Bumperpodcast business cards and stickers for 2020.

    Memorable Quotes

    “The weirdest part was I went into her little dog house and found a stack of papers. She had actually written up a business plan for a kiosk in the mall called Spicy Socks.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Oh, hello. It's I'm Frenchie. It's a new lawyer in the neighborhood. And I am very good at the law, the American law.”

    — Producer/Frenchie

    “Don't let lawyers get involved with your dog's dreams. Don't let lawyers step all over your puppy's plans.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #dogs #puppies #lawyers #comedy #pets #businessplans #competition #chaos

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Frenchie (Producer), Producer

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: good good good good good morning good afternoon good evening whatever time it is that you're listening to the bumper podcast we greatly appreciate you being here and why well because there's 18 bazillion other things that you could be doing with your time but you're choosing to spend it with me and i appreciate that because i miss you guys i miss you guys a lot every day that i don't record i end up missing you did you miss me too hi pig hey what's going on bumpsy so here's the thing uh uh your dog uh popcorn was uh down in the basement need a laundry room and i'd like for you just to take a guess at what she was doing down the uh the basement is where the laundry is where the laundry room where the laundry baskets where the laundry chute is it's also where things are folded please tell me that she did not get into the socks she got she got into the socks you told yeah well so here's the thing uh nobody has socks anymore we are now officially a sock free house i don't know what it is she i never seen they eat no paints i never seen they eat no shirts but uh socks she's all about them socks don't matter if it's uh pig socks if it's bumper car socks uh old socks new socks red socks blue socks you see what i'm doing there huh so all gone i mean the sock is mostly still there but the uh the foot part gone the toe part gone okay but it is tubes you have fabric tubes all right excuse me uh this is really annoying like guys have you ever had a puppy and uh when they eat stuff all the time i think i've mentioned it before when we first got popcorn uh she's a little beagle black lab kind of cute kind of smallish about 33 pounds uh um she people were like watch out she's gonna eat everything and i was like i've had a dog at irving brown socks he didn't eat anything he was wonderful oh no no no no no no it could not have been more off the mark this dog eats everything uh the sofa she ate that a sofa couch how does a dog do that remote controls two of them shoes one two three four pairs of shoes two pairs of flip-flops i mean the list is never ending the socks after socks after socks after socks it's it's just too much um hmm so how do i handle this oh now excuse me i do believe that we have a predicament here why some sort of liturgy liturgist liturgitude lawyer talk speak if you if you catch my drift if you understand what i'm saying okay so i do i hmm hey rufus i do understand what you're saying but i don't think we need a lawyer right now at this point for the dog who ate some socks that's exactly what someone who would say who in fact very much did require having the services of someone who is scholastically trained in such situations as sock eating hey bump akari didn't wait rufus you actually went to school for sock eating law i didn't even know that was a thing well hold on a second maybe we do need them bump I know he can be a bit much, but in this situation, maybe he's going to be able to guide us. Maybe they'll actually be worth something for once finally, right? I don't know. Well, no. I think the answer is no. She's a dog. She's a puppy. We have to be better about putting our things away and making sure she doesn't get into places where she can eat things. I know it's hard to believe, but she's just a puppy, and we're responsible for her. And so we have to help her to make better decisions and not be in situations where bad stuff can happen. Now, as I was flipping through my law books here, I did come across a precedent-setting case of SOC law in which… The perpetrator did actually have to re-encompensate the affiliated members of the action in which the perpetration was, in fact, perpetrated. So what I'm saying is, son, now what I'm saying is, the law has spoken. Safe bump? It's that easy? The law has spoken. The law has spoken. I mean, case closed? No. I don't know. No. So here's the thing. When people… We got the puppy, and people said, oh, she's going to eat things. She's going to eat things. And then she started eating things. I started doing some internet research, and it was one of those situations where it was just like, how to get your puppy to stop eating things it's not supposed to. And it said to actually add… There was like this, a powder, right? A little spray. And it was a spray, but it was kind of dry when it came out, like a powder. And it was like some sort of hot cayenne, like pepper. And I was like, ooh, is that going to hurt the puppy? And so I got it, and I tried it. And just on a couple of pairs of socks. And she ran over like a bolt of lightning and ate… Like almost the whole sock before I could get it away from her. And the look in her eye, she was just like, yes. Yes, I do like spicy socks. And the weirdest part of that was I went into her little dog house, into her little area, and I found a stack of papers. And she had actually written up a business plan for like a kiosk in the mall, like those little… If you're in a mall and have little restaurants or little things in the middle, like, oh, you can get a pretzel, you can get a drink, whatever. She made a business plan, and it was really well written for a place, a little restaurant called Spicy Socks. So I don't know if I should… I mean, if this is her passion, then maybe I should just let it happen. Maybe I'm the problem here. I don't know. Now, of course, you are the problem, Mr. Bumpercar, as you always tend to be. Now, as far as these documents that you discovered, who exactly was the person who put them together? Because I do not understand, according to my log, that I was ever approached for such things. Oh, yeah. Rufus, you ain't heard? There's a new lawyer dude in town setting up shop. I don't know what his name is. It's like… I forget what his name is. It's like Frenchie or… I don't know. Something like that. But he seems like really good, and his rates are really good. And maybe he took over? I don't know. There's just been a lot… I'm just saying there's a little competition up in your area right now. I should ask Popcorn about this.

    Frenchie (Producer): Who's… What? Oh, hello. It's… I'm Frenchie. It's a new lawyer in the neighborhood. And I am very good at the law, the American law. I went through all the schools, and I did all of the things. And believe me, you are in good hands with Frenchie, me lawyer. And I will protect you. And I understood the stock law. And I can do all of the things that is… Oh, hello. This is absolute.

    Natty Bumpercar: My name is Rufus T. Rufus. And I have a lot of letters after my name because I have so many degrees, and they had to make them into letters. And I am the lawyer, imperate, in trans…

    Producer: In trans-fu-ma-si-o-ne. Yes, in trans-fu-ma-si-o-ne. Don't you try to help me now. Well, I'm just trying to help.

    Natty Bumpercar: You ain't. You're hop-stepping on my lily pad here. I'm the lawyer. I am. I am the lawyer, sir.

    Producer: Now, sir, there are plenty of rooms everywhere around here for lawyers. And I am another lawyer, and I will be the helping man to the peoples. All of these peoples everywhere.

    Natty Bumpercar: Pig, do you notice anything about this lawyer? Yeah. He sounds a lot like producer does.

    Producer: Actually, I don't think that he sounds… …anything like me, even a little bit at all, and I bet he doesn't even seem… I would agree totally with this frog man that I don't sound anything like him. He clearly has his own accent, I clearly have my own accent, and they're very far apart. I am a lawyer, he is a frog. And I am a frog, and he is a lawyer, so he's very different. I don't think that it's happening here.

    Natty Bumpercar: You know, Bumpercar, I didn't want to get back into the fray, as it were, but I do feel like I hear similarities in the voice of patterns, if you will. Maybe something I can look into as a copyright infringement. I'm going to shut this new lawyer down. Too sweet. Oh, man. All right, so what do we talk about today? There's a dog eating socks, going to open up a stand called Spicy Socks, there's a new lawyer called Frenchie, this show is off the rails. Yeah, I agree. But, here's a cool thing. We're going to figure all this lawyer-y stuff out in the back room, but neat things are happening in 2020. It's 2020, y'all. 2020. And I, we got business cards made with the podcast, and they're really cool. I'll probably post those when I post this episode. We also were getting stickers made of the podcast, and my goal for those is, is if people will listen to the show, and will subscribe to it, and will write a little review, then, you know, like give it a little rating, then that's awesome. That helps us out so much. Because as much as we… We all love getting down here and making this for you, we want other people to hear it, too. And so that's the ultimate goal. So I will let people know how they can get these stickers as soon as I kind of figure it all out and put it onto the internet webs. But anyway, I want you to know, Popcorn's a good dog. She's just a hungry dog. And sometimes puppies are going to make business plans about eating. So… That's just something that's going to happen. But what I would say is, don't let lawyers get involved with your dog's dreams. Don't let lawyers step all over your puppy's plans. She's… My puppy is smart. She knows what she's doing. She goes down to the local library. She does her research. And I'm… I'm here for her. Whatever she needs, I'm here for. Bumps, have you tried the spicy sauce? They are, uh, not so good. Yeah, I actually did try these things and was in the hospital for several days. I do not want to be involved with this business unless it's people suing, litigating against it. This place is going to fold like a deck of cards.

    Producer: Haha, you have fallen into my trap. And that is, officially you have said bad things about my client's business. That you should not have said on the podcast. I will be suing you, Rufus T. Rufus. Get your papers ready because I'll be coming for you and taking you downtown.

    Natty Bumpercar: Okay, now I'm officially confused. Was that the Frenchie lawyer or was that producer? I honestly can't tell anymore. It's officially the mystery of the week.

    Unknown: Okay, well, I don't like that. You're still young and you can still lose to the送 XX. Fine, I'll give you another chance. This can't be working. When has Mia been straightforwarded on? Now I have asked Maria over time. To confirm, you now personally have made a request for your son, but you still do not yet. Have you received a copy of the contract? What do we do? Yes, Music Video Coding program. We are the same agency as Rufus. And we love agenda cool. Where'sinas? This is Chris. This is Alex.

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  • Bumperpodcast #367 – Time is a flat circle

    Bumperpodcast #367 – Time is a flat circle

    Natty starts talking about time, and baubles, and then gets a bit nostalgic, and also a bit flustered. It’s almost like deja vu!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In episode 367 of the Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar reflects on post-holiday blues and the passage of time after all the festive decorations come down. Host Natty explores deep concepts like "time is a flat circle" and nostalgia, sharing humorous stories about conflating memories of family dogs Popcorn and Irving Brown Socks. The episode takes listeners through Natty's personal experiences with déjà vu, cave crickets in a Georgia crawl space, and his children's nostalgia for "the good old days" at the brown house. Natty wraps up with motivational thoughts about using time wisely and the mysterious Tree Wolf who takes away Christmas trees each year, leaving pine needles everywhere.

    Memorable Quotes

    “Did you know in school in my yearbook I was labeled the one who likes fancy doodads the most? My middle name is sparkly doodad bumper car. It's not but…”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “The tree wolf comes out of the forest and he takes our tree and he drags it back into the forest. The tree wolf is not a clean wolf, he's a dirty wolf.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “Time is a flat circle and time is not linear. Your memories, the older you get they all build up and sometimes they start to get a little bit combined.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #time #nostalgia #post-holiday #memories #philosophy #family #dogs #motivation

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: oh woe is me woe is me woe is me it is that time of year when all of the beautiful sparkly baubles go away the lights the trees the ornaments all the fancy doodads and it makes me so sad because i love fancy doodads why did you know in school in my yearbook i was labeled the one who likes fancy doodads the most did you know that my middle name is sparkly doodad bumper car it's not but guys it's it's hard because we just went through all the big holidays you had your thanksgivings you had all this stuff in december we had new year's and now we're just in june january oh january it's this cold month that's just here and it's fine it's good i'm not gonna knock january why one of my sweet beautiful children was born in january but it's it's it's it's not the best month because i mean what do i yeah all the fun stuff just to happen now we gotta wait we gotta wait for what's the next thing valentine's day all right did you know i was at the grocery store the other day and uh they were taking all the christmas stuff down so this was december 26th and they were putting the valentine's day stuff up in december and i was just like no grocery store i will not buy your heart-shaped candies yet not until february 12th in a rush a mad rush that's when i get my cards and whatnot you know here's the thing it made me think of time and and i read i there was a cool uh little not slogan little saying call it says time is a flat circle and i was like what does that mean what is a flat what does that mean like a flat circle i guess if it was a 3d circle it would be a ball but time is a flat circle and so it was just kind of like the things that you have done will come back around and you'll do them again and again and again throughout your entire life i don't and i don't know really what the point of it is i guess it's just to say to pay attention you know also time is not linear what does linear mean it means like a straight line so time can fold back on you on itself and i know that doesn't make any sense but time is weird if you think about it you know you're born you live you do your life and then you're in you go away i guess i don't know i don't know what happens i haven't been there yet but you have memories and you have nostalgia and what that is is when the holidays come and maybe you smell a candle that smells like a tree and then you have another time that you smelled a candle that smelled like a tree and the time kind of folds in on itself and your memories and the older you get your memories they all build up right and so sometimes they start to get a little bit combined um especially my brain loves to conflate things what does conflate mean it means to just kind of squish things together a little bit sometimes unintended it's like how i uh you know i'll look at our dog popcorn who's uh 10 months old beagle black lab maybe you've met her i hope you have and uh just seeing her uh the way she'll run in the backyard sometimes will uh make me have little flashbacks to memories of irving brown socks my my puppy dog uh and then i start to think about things that socks did but things that popcorn did and then i can't remember which of the dogs actually did that thing and then i start to conflate them and then i just put them in the uh dog folder in my brain i'm like well that's a dog activity i'm just gonna put it in the dog box this is where the memories of dog things go and sometimes if it gets jostled or shaken up or moved around i'm just gonna put it in the dog box and then i start to think about then uh you know maybe one of the two of the thoughts will get a little confused um now that's a funny thing because it can get confusing have you ever had deja vu do you know what that is deja vu is super cool that's when you're doing something and then you kind of your brain goes wait a minute haven't i been here before haven't i done this thing before already wasn't i already in this exact spot or you know somebody will say to you like uh uh oh i'll have a fruit smoothie and you're like yeah you will how did i know you were gonna say that i feel like i've been in this very moment already and i don't know what deja vu is is it just your mind working quicker than the world around it is it just you know maybe you were kind of not focused not paying attention and then you come back to the world and it's kind of overwhelming and your brain is just like ah this is that okay here we are and this is what's happening i don't know is it is it uh shadows of whispers of memories of of things that are happening i don't know i don't know we're not learning i mean we're learning all kinds of fun stuff what we learned so far time is a flat circle time is not linear the one i just said deja vu that one conflation that was a big one to learn today um but so the older you get it's it's it's fun even my kids they uh you know 10 and 7 they they they will get nostalgic for things in their past i mean emerson's only 10 years old but he'll be like oh i remember the good old days remember the good old days i'm like what is the good old what does that mean to you what are the good old days you're 10 years old all your days have been pretty good what are the what are the good old days he's like ah the good old days where we lived in the brown house i'm like ah yes the brown house uh emerson has a a few touchstones uh that he likes to his memories go back to they flow back to and the brown house is one of them remember the brown house dad and i'm like yeah you were four how do you like what kind of foundational memories were you making at the brown house i remember the brown house was cold i remember the brown house was uh uh dark and it had um those cave crickets in the basement what are cave crickets they're horrifying monstrous little bugs that have these four legs and when they bounce they go boom like that and they're aggressive they'll come at you they're not bugs that are like i'm gonna scurry away i don't want to see people no they're bugs that are like like hey hey hey you hey hey you're like no no thank you i don't want no thank you please no go away bug not a fan not a fan when we used to live in georgia this was pre-children uh i had to do a lot of work under our house we had a crawl space a crawl space is a space under a house uh it's usually like three i think ours is maybe two and a half three feet so not not not a lot dirt you know it's the the ground is under the house dirt yucky dirt dirt dirt dirt and i had to go under there and clean out the whole space take everything that was out in there out and then i put in uh a new uh i put stuff called lime which is just some stuff you put in the dirt i don't know it changes the ph what does that mean i don't know so i was told to do and then i had to put this new liner on the ground to keep the moisture from the ground away from the house and as i'm doing all this work by myself in the dark these crickets would come at me constantly like boing boing boing what are you doing boing what are you doing boing what are you doing boing and i was just like please leave me alone i couldn't even sit up in there so i'd have to roll away from them and they would follow me and they were faster at hopping than i was at rolling and it was just not pleasant it was just not pleasant at all i'm hoping that that is not something if time is in fact a flat circle that is going to come around to me again and again i don't want to have any more confrontation i don't want to have any more confrontation i don't with cave crickets don't want to at all back to the point and time use it preciously use it wisely don't dawdle get as much stuff done as you can don't overextend yourself because if you do you might get sick and i don't want you to get tired okay i want you to live to your potential with and use your time as best you can and i don't want you to get tired okay i want you to live to your best as you can make yourself happy do good things for yourself do good things for other people use your time wisely right right this has become a motivational speech and i'm fine with that time is not infinite your your your time is finite finite finite finite infinite finite finite no finite uh what does that mean that means there's a beginning and there's an end so use all the time that you have as best as you can and and it'll be great it'll be great even if you have to rest a little bit that's still using your time just be cognizant be aware that you're using your time it'll be good it'll be good i uh i was reading all these quotes like famous people quotes and it was just they were all basically like um you know what was it uh this is uh charles darwin said a man who dares to waste one hour of life has not discovered the value of life okay so don't waste your time charles we got it charles darwin one day you should look him up he's cool he went to the galapagos islands there were turtles there there's more to them but that's that's that's just the high notes we're just hitting the high notes guy named uh let's see thomas jefferson you ever heard of him he's a big name says determined never to be idle no person will have occasion to complain of the want of time who never loses any it is wonderful how much can be done if we are always doing so just do stuff i mean these guys are much wordier than i am i'm basically like uh you should do some stuff maybe you should do some stuff like i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know i don't know like that but um anyway guys you know what i'm gonna go be nostalgic about my my my baubles my tree my christmas lights i'm gonna go uh clean up the glitter that fell on the ground as i was moving things oh and i'm gonna tell you one one more quick story so in our house here at headquarters every year the uh when it's time to take the tree down we take we have to take everything off the tree we take all the ornaments we take the lights off and uh then the tree wolf comes out of the forest and he takes our tree and he drags it back into the forest and i don't know what happens after that do you guys have a tree wolf where does your tree go how did who how does your tree leave the house my kids they some of them they were like dad you take the tree out and i was just like that's not even possible i can't pick this tree up it's too big doesn't even fit through the door the tree wolf does it and the worst thing about the tree wolf is that when he drags the tree out of the house he leaves all the needles everywhere the tree wolf is not a clean wolf he's a dirty wolf but anyway collecting trees for all these years out in the forest out in the woods i don't know what his plan is i don't know what his angle is but i know the tree wolf means business and i do too and you do too you know why because you're the bumper podcast cateers and it's a new year new year what does that mean we're getting stickers made pretty soon i'll tell you how you can get a sticker so just keep listening keep being awesome i love you you're my best friend all right

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  • Bumperpodcast #366 – Decade Review

    Bumperpodcast #366 – Decade Review

    Natty invites all of his favorite guests over to talk about their favorite moments from the last decade. It’s a magical journey of reminiscing!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this special decade-ending episode of Bumperpodcast, Natty Bumpercar celebrates the last show of 2019 and the entire 2010s by inviting characters to share their favorite memories from the past ten years. The episode features appearances from quirky characters including Bargle, Cousin, Heos, Frenchie, and Ullman, who share humorous and touching stories ranging from community kudzu dinners to lactose intolerance discoveries. Regular cast members Aloysius J. Pig, Rufus T. Rufus, and Doodle Poodle also join to reflect on their decade. The episode concludes with a heartwarming surprise appearance from Natty's real-life children, Ollie and Emmy, who share what they're thankful for as the show wraps up a decade of puppet comedy.

    Memorable Quotes

    “You got to live your life. You got to live your life, man. You got to live your life. Because otherwise, you're not going to live.”

    — Frenchie

    “You got to be present. You got to be aware of the world around you. You got to live in it. Otherwise, what are you doing? You're here for a certain amount of time.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    “You're bringing in all these random characters. Who's Frenchie? Who's Bargle? They ain't never been on the show. It don't make no sense, man.”

    — Aloysius J. Pig

    Topics: #nostalgia #newyear #reflection #friendship #family #decaderetrospective #gratitude

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Ollie (Natty's son), Emmy (Natty's daughter)

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: well well well hello there bumper podcast it's me natty bumper car and this is the last show not just of 2019 but of the entire decade 10 years of bumper podcasts why i remember when you were just a tiny bumper podcast and now look at you all grown up and big i'm so proud of you um so what i thought would be a fun idea for this episode would be if we um reminisce a little bit if we you know got some of the our pals that are on the show and had them in and kind of you know just reminisce and and and and thought about fun things that happened like maybe their favorite things so without further ado uh i'm gonna bring in our first guest so uh um take it away i guess oh look at that production we have a cool noise hey so um go ahead bargle what's what's what's your yes biggest memory i like it i like it i like it wow really i don't remember that well i'm so glad that you decided to come in and share that i'm not you know what i'm impressed because a lot of people don't put themselves out on podcasts or in friendships or relationships like you just did bargle so i'm i hey i'm glad we made it through the last decade and i can't wait to see what we do next decade cool cool cool well i mean that's gonna be hard to uh to top i mean it's not a competition but let's bring in our next guest to see what what how his decade was and what his favorite memory was well i remember when i was just a knee-high tadpole growing up in the kudzu wood thatту behind my house because i wasn't allowed in the house necessarily and all the kudzu creatures kept me company and one day we were supposed to be having a community kudzu dinner and we couldn't afford none of the food and so what we did was to um we all gathered our resources and we had a talent show and everybody came out from the hills to the valleys and we earned enough money that we all got to share a chestnut which was roasted on an open fire and just made everybody's dicky. That was my favorite moment of them all. That's wonderful. Thanks for having me, Natty. Absolutely, cousin. I'm so glad you could be here. Wow, this is really working out better than I ever would have expected. What great stories we're getting. I mean, they came together as a community. I'm so happy right now. I'm going to keep going because I feel like we're doing amazingly and I don't want to stop. Let's see, who's coming up? Oh, it's Heos. What's going on, Heos? Your name? Your name always cracks me up. I love it when you come on this show. Oh, really? That happened? And was she okay? Oh, thank goodness. I got worried. It turns out funny in the end. Yeah. That's tremendous. Man. Oh, really? Yes. Well, I didn't expect that. It's a real twist. Yes. Ah, thanks, Heos. It's great. Wow. I mean, it's like story after story after story. It's… I feel like everybody's had a pretty great decade. I guess we'll keep going. I don't know. Play the noise, producer. Right. So, I didn't know. I'm just… There. I almost went out of tune. I didn't want to have one of those. You don't. Because I was like, who wants to have breakfast and some lunch? That's too much. I don't believe it's proper. Yeah. And so, what I'm thinking is like, I'm going to go to Antibody. I'm going to have a spotter. You know, just a copper. And I'm going to just take it in and look around a bit. You guys do that sometimes. And so, my last decade, I was like, whoa, I just… Oh, other place. Yeah. And I was like, did you know? I didn't. I didn't know. How could you? And I had to really do to write a book. I did some research. And I did a walkabout. And I was just like, I think this is wonderful. This whole world is just such a big place. Yeah, it's huge. And I was like, look at this. You know, so it's like eye-opening. I was like, oh. I had no idea. I was just going to be like, experience. Everything. And I was just like, oh, stop. Oh. And so, I wanted to tell you that. And I was like, ugh. Yeah. And then, I didn't know. But I was like, really into it. And I was like, oh, man. There's a lot. And so, I didn't tell you. But I wanted to tell everybody about it. It's like, got to get out of there. You got to do your own stuff. All right? Because otherwise, you're not going to live. You got to live your life. Yeah, you got to live your life. You got to live your life, man. You got to live your life. All right. I agree. That's all I got. That's the best. Hey, you're the best, man. No, Frenchie. Listen. I think you hit the nail on the head there. You went out there. You weren't just going to sit around. And you lived your life. And you experienced the world. And it was an eye-opening experience. And I think that's what you have to do in life. I always talk about it on the podcast. But you got to be present. You got to be aware of the world around you. You got to live in it. Right? Otherwise, what are you doing? Like, you're here for a certain amount of time. And you got to, really, you got to keep your eyes open. Keep your ears open. Interact with people. Hear their stories. Get their perspectives. And you may not always agree with it. You may not even like it. But I think it's important to stay aware. Right? Of what's happening around you. This is, I think, my favorite episode that we've ever done. Let's see. I think we've got one more. And then we've got a couple surprise guests coming in. But let's see how your, what your favorite moment of the last decade was. Ullman, get up here. Well, I don't really appreciate it that you say this is my last decade. No, no, no. Because I've been here for much longer. No, not your last decade. The last. The. Excuse me. The. I didn't know what you meant by that. No, yeah, the last decade. My choice is the last decade. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, sorry. Not my last decade. No, no. No. That's a, that's a bit of nomic. I understand now. Okay, good, good, good. Sorry about that. Let me research. My favorite moment of the last decade, I believe, was I fell in love with a beautiful sunset What? What? Named. Named. Sunrise and the clouds and the skies and the butterflies and people saying why, why and all such things as that. And I chose to live that life with sunrise and sunset and the butterflies. You're still rhyming. And also I found out that I'm allergic. To what? What are you allergic to? To milk. Like lactose? Lactose? Lactose. Lactose intolerance. Okay. Lactose intolerance. That was my favorite moment. Oh, no. Because I couldn't eat ice cream anymore. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's my least favorite moment. I couldn't eat ice cream anymore. I'm sorry. And so what I started doing was just buying it by the tub and putting it in my freezer. But why? I currently have 16 freezers in my house full of ice cream that I can't even eat. That's so many freezers. Which is fine. Yeah, it's okay. You know. Yeah, I'm sorry. Yeah. Yeah. I don't remember what the question was at this point, but I feel like I should have You answered it appropriately. Yes. Thoroughly. You did very well. Willingly. Yes. And entirely. Okay, great. I thank you so much. I'm going to go stir my ice cream now. Okay, Ullman. And not eat it. No, Ullman. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. Oh, we had so many nice stories, and then we had kind of a sad story at the end. Oh. I guess maybe Ullman can pick it up by having a big ice cream party, and everybody can come and sample some of the 16 freezers full of ice cream that are in his house. Oh, man. I got a little sad. Hey, man. Uh-oh. Yeah, I got a problem. What? A real problem right now. Who? Yeah, it's me, Pig. I don't understand. So listen. You had your big year in show, your big decade in show. You're bringing in all these random characters. Who's Frenchie? Who's Bargle? Who's Cousin? I don't know none of these people. They ain't never been on the show. And you're wrapping up the entire decade with all these people who ain't ever even been on the show never once before. It don't make no sense, man. It makes perfect sense. Come on. Aloysius J. Pig, I'm your co-host. I'm on the show all the time. You are, but… I don't even understand. No, Natty. None of this makes… It doesn't make no sense contractually. You have not even put these people… You haven't given them key cards. You haven't put them on the registrar. You haven't even given them cubbies in the locker rooms here at headquarters. You don't need cubbies. I don't believe that they should be featured on the Bumper Podcast 2020 year-end, decade-ending, wrap-up episode, last one of the season of the year. I do fear, however, that you are… Perhaps a little loop-de-loop, and maybe that's what's happening. I am not loop-de-loop in the least. Fine. If you guys want to give your big last decade memories, then I guess we can do that. Aloysius, you go first. Yeah, great. So here I am, chopped liver, stuck on the end. I guess this is my least favorite. I'm going to be like that old dude who… Old man, fine. But I don't even know what to say. I guess I'm happy. I wake up in a warm bed of hay every day. I get food. That makes me happy. I have my friends. Some of my friends are not as nice to me today as they were yesterday. Don't know what's going on with that. But overall, I'd say it's a great decade. I was basically, you know, born into the industry in the last decade. So I see a bright future. I do, too. I'm sorry. Please, come on. Okay, we're good. Get it together. Get it together. Get it, get it, get it, get it. I, myself, have had a phenomenal decade. That's good. I've moved over to e-science. I don't have to have as many documents in my bag. Okay. I can just look at my literature on my tablet. Okay. And I can understand that it's all there. And people just put it in their phones. That's cool. It's not much, but it's really helped me out tremendously. Well, that's good, Rufus. I don't have to go to the library to use a fax machine anymore. Okay. My litigious career is over the top, over the roof. That's good. I think we have a couple more. Let's bring Doodle Poodle. Please come here and tell us how your decade was. Also, I made a lot of doodles. So for the last year, I learned how to sharpen a pencil. And I even learned how to make watercolor doodles. So I had a fun time. I always have a fun time. I like being a dog. Thanks, Doodle Poodle. All right. Now I feel a little bit better. We did have a lot of new characters. I don't really know what I was doing. But I had an amazing decade with you guys. The 2010s were pretty swell. And I really hope the world gets to be a better place and more inclusive and nicer to everybody. And, you know, I like progress. I like things moving forward. That makes me happy. You know, I feel like we have a lot of work to do. And I feel like, you know, just if you talk to people, smile at people, acknowledge people, because everyone's going through stuff. And you don't know what they're going through. So if you're at a restaurant and maybe your water doesn't get there fast enough, it's okay. Your water's going to get there. And, you know, it's… Just relax, everybody. It's going to be okay. All right? All right. Happy New Year to you and all of yours. And the Bumper Podcast will be back in 2020 with all kinds of fun episodes. I'm assuming… I'm hoping that you'll be there with me. Share it with your friends. Rate it on whatever you listen to. And give yourself… Give yourself a hug. You deserve it. Or at least a high five. Whatever you want. It's fine. Wait, wait, Daddy. Oh, hey, guys. Did I forget you? Yeah. Oh, I can't believe it. I'm so sorry. Hi.

    Unknown: Hi.

    Natty Bumpercar: You know what I forgot to say my favorite part of the last decade was? Everything. You guys.

    Unknown: Oh. Oh, yeah.

    Ollie (Natty's son): I liked everything.

    Natty Bumpercar: You liked every single thing?

    Ollie (Natty's son): Yep.

    Natty Bumpercar: I don't know if that's true.

    Ollie (Natty's son): I liked when we went to Atlanta.

    Natty Bumpercar: You liked when we went to Atlanta?

    Ollie (Natty's son): Yeah. Oh.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, that's sweet. What about you?

    Ollie (Natty's son): I liked everything.

    Natty Bumpercar: Every single thing? Yep. Even when Popcorn was a puppy?

    Emmy (Natty's daughter): Yep.

    Natty Bumpercar: Wow. So, Emmy, you were born in 2009. Well, we don't have to give all that out, but yes. So, here's the cool thing. So, you have now, as of two days from now, been alive in three different decades. Yep. The 0s. Both. The 10s. And the 20s. The 20s. So, three decades is 30 years, but you're only 10 years old. Is that crazy?

    Emmy (Natty's daughter): Yeah, 20 years now.

    Natty Bumpercar: Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And, Ollie, you were born in 20 what? 13. 13? Are you sure? Yeah. That doesn't make any sense to me.

    Emmy (Natty's daughter): He's only been one decade from now.

    Natty Bumpercar: He's, for right now, it's one decade, but in two days, it'll be two decades. Woo. And I've been alive in 800 decades. No. Because I'm eternal.

    Unknown: No, you're not.

    Natty Bumpercar: Dad. That's yelling. Why are you yelling at the microphone? I don't know. Yeah, you don't know, do you? Well, so, real quick. What are you thankful for from the last decade? Don't say everything.

    Ollie (Natty's son): The Easter Bunny thing.

    Natty Bumpercar: The Easter Bunny thing? Okay.

    Emmy (Natty's daughter): It's Christmas.

    Natty Bumpercar: You're thankful for Christmas and the Easter Bunny and your family?

    Emmy (Natty's daughter): Yes. I'm thankful for the one when we got our dog, and I'm thankful for the one Kalahari.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh. So, your trips we took with your friends.

    Emmy (Natty's daughter): And Atlanta.

    Natty Bumpercar: Wonderful.

    Ollie (Natty's son): Well, guys, Happy New Year. You too, Dad. Happy New Year.

    Natty Bumpercar: I love you guys.

    Ollie (Natty's son): I love you too, Daddy.

    Natty Bumpercar: Let's see. I love you guys more than beans love rice, more than cheese loves mice, more than…

    Ollie (Natty's son): A billion, kajillion dollars.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh, that's right. More than a bajillion, kajillion dollars.

    Ollie (Natty's son): I love you more than anything. Me too. I love you. Oh, geese. Oh.

    Natty Bumpercar: Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh.

    Unknown: Good job, guys.

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  • Bumperpodcast #365 – Holiday Season

    Bumperpodcast #365 – Holiday Season

    Yay! The boys are back in town, and they are excited to talk – and sometimes scream – about the holidays!

    The Bumperpodcast is an oftentimes hilarious weekly romp around Headquarters, in Coffee-Can Alley, with Natty Bumpercar and his entire gaggle of pals!

    You should send us an email to bumperpodcast@nattybumpercar.com. We’re here and we’re listening!

    Go like our Facebook page (https://www.facebook.com/TheBumperpodcast/)!!

    About This Episode

    In this special holiday episode of Bumperpodcast, host Natty Bumpercar is joined by two young guests, Emerson and Oliver, for a delightful conversation about Christmas traditions. The trio discusses their family's Elf on the Shelf named "Elfie the Abominable Snow Monster," debates whether Christmas trees grow pine cones, and shares their holiday wish lists. Emerson reveals a preference for LEGOs while Oliver humorously asks for a kitty cat (despite allergies). Rufus T. Rufus makes a brief chaotic appearance when someone mentions "loop." The conversation meanders through topics like chimney cleaning costs, school delays due to ice, and the proper way to say holiday greetings, creating a charming and authentic glimpse into a family's Christmas preparations.

    Memorable Quotes

    “A baby sister? NO!”

    — Oliver

    “You can't touch him because he's… the magic is gone and then you no longer have an elf.”

    — Emerson

    “Did you know the plural form of lego is lego? You don't have to put an s on it. Just lego. It's like if you see one sheep, five sheep.”

    — Natty Bumpercar

    Topics: #christmas #elfontheshelf #holidaytraditions #family #legos #gifts #santaclaus #kids

    Featuring: Natty Bumpercar, Rufus T. Rufus

    Full Transcript

    Natty Bumpercar: well well well boys and girls ladies and gentlemen it's me natty bumper car and this is the bumper podcast but i can't do this episode by myself because it's a very special episode where i have my very special friends who i helped create in the headquarters studio with me let's introduce them hello there what is your name emerson your name is emerson that's fun what is your name oliver your name is oliver what are you guys here for do you think for the podcast well yes yes you are here for the podcast but what do you think we're gonna that's right it's a christmas podcast it's a christmas miracle and we're talking about our elfer stuff and our yeah you think okay so let's see we'll start off with the christmas stuff because that's what we were talking about for what emerson what's your favorite thing about christmas spending spending getting present oh that's a good answer i'm gonna look over this way um oliver same question what is your favorite thing about christmas like you got talking to the microphone can you say that again family and hanging up my stocking you like hanging up your stuff we haven't done that yet have we have do we even have a christmas tree yes do we we name our christmas no wait what i thought everybody named their christmas tree no it's not i'll say hi piney it's a pine tree yeah i get it hi uh i think i get it um what are they what it's called oh pine cone hi coney like pine cones i don't think i grow them they don't grow pine cones oh christmas trees don't grow pine cones nope man this and so we have

    Unknown: our elf so wait what's our elf's name elfi the snow monster elfi the snow monster elfi the

    Natty Bumpercar: abominable wait really and you've now we've had him for 10 years he's been around with us his name just changed elfi the abominable yes that's what you named him i didn't name him you did yeah okay how does the elf work what's the deal with that um so we good in our last day wow and does he come every day no oh no what happens oh no oh no oh no and then what happened he didn't come so do you think he goes back to the north pole and talks to santa claus and he's probably heading what no he's no i don't think our elf goes to the sewers it's not town hall town hall that's similar to the

    Unknown: sewer maybe maybe he goes maybe he goes back to the sewers

    Natty Bumpercar: to the pole yeah i think he goes to the north pole and like to the elf spa and gets like an elf pedicure and manic and like relaxes let's not do that with the trash can um so he brings you guys little presents every day which is very very nice oh you got when did you get that today oh that's cute uh cardinal is a bird oh um and so that's fun so christmas elf and our elf is currently so wait does he is he on the christmas tree every day where does he usually go like a yeah it's hard to keep up with this elf he moves around a lot um and so what else do we oh he got a little cough has he really i wonder what's drawing him no oh you i can't touch him because he's what happens to the elf he's gone magic the magic is gone and then you no longer have an elf you never longer have uh elfie the snowman what do you guys oh sorry elfie the abominable snow monster can't jinx me we're doing a podcast i had to think about it for a second and i'm like oh my god i'm a second but i'm not allowed to talk if you jinx me and this is a pod it's an audio medium yep that means talking talking yeah no one's gonna no one's gonna listen to a podcast if everyone's jinxed and not talking it sounds terrible it sounds better uh emerson what do you want for no i guess you don't uh but do you have stuff in mind for legos oh but now you are telling did you know the plural form of lego is so you don't have to put an s on it no just just lego it's like uh if you see uh one c five yeah so lego is singular and plural it's the same lego logo if you see one logo it's a logo see a lot of logos plural no it's l-o-g-o-s um ollie what do you think you want for a baby sister no oh my goodness that was a big yell uh a kitty cat a family he's allergic oh that's true wow i want i only want eight stuff oh did you really so i guess i wow i think we all win in the end now do you guys feel like have you been good enough this year for yes okay and do you have uh is the chimney been cleaned out nope i think it did get clean we had some gentlemen come out and uh clean our chimney so maybe that'll that's what the new pipe is oh yeah that's the the chimney pipe yeah we got a new pipe for santa claus it's crazy wrong it cost way too um yeah to fix all this stuff that's broken around here whoa a hundred dollars he wants a stack of cash wow that's just stacks on cash and what is it uh we're making money the pyramid mummy oh i got hit in the face that's not nice uh why are we still home guys why is there a delayed opening all the time but there's no snow ice ice ice baby baby ice ice ice baby uh so um yeah there's a lot there but not enough to delay the school opening uh and so we're we're doing this to occupy our time a little bit right yes and uh they are not a sponsor of this podcast so yeah we could just we could just say we're going right and actually i think they changed their name i think that their name is now duncan i don't know if it still has donuts yeah because yeah i don't know i thought i read um so what else is exciting for about the holiday it's the holiday songs and the loop what

    Unknown: did somebody say loop over here

    Rufus T. Rufus: rufus d rufus that is my name and i heard someone say i'm not gonna have to steal anything that i already own child this is my podcast this is my house and you are my children no and you also cannot yell into the microphone and it did because that's gonna cause legal issues where it was eardrums explode and i had to pay for it can't afford to do these disney fucking people this is excellent oh god this is awkward it looks had to arms to God I just hope he gets the best night out of me this morning I have to go to the martiness stage ouu ok が o ov that's

    Natty Bumpercar: so hey no no he didn't did you say loopy loop oh i think i might have been singing a song and i think it might have come um so wait emerson i'm curious that's interesting so you don't say happy holidays what do you say oh merry holidays and you said merry christmas so do you know something really oh well it's merry christmas but i i usually just say i go happy holidays because there's a lot of different holidays that are happening around this and so i want to make sure everybody feels there's uh it's christmas wanza there's hanukkah it is uh a holiday i don't really i don't know a lot about it but well here's a good thing i think i'm going to uh do some research and come back and tell you guys about all the holidays the next time there's also tuesday that's a good holiday

    Unknown: yeah isn't it a holiday taco tuesday christmas oh is that day and christmas eve is on that's true

    Natty Bumpercar: and what happens on christmas eve yeah it goes away right i know i know what's going on well guys thank you so much that's true thank you so much for being on this show did you have fun today uh are you guys hungry let's go get some food in your belly but listen just throw the food in your belly i'm not gonna do that no way um all right bumper god bumper podcast this is natty bumper car with my little pals emerson and oliver and you guys are amazing

    Unknown: you you

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